Always been mine!

chapter nineteen

Me: "What cobwebs?" I rolled my eyes. "He said he isn’t going to give up until I let him f**k me. He thinks that'll make me get over whatever man hurt me in the past."

Bonnie laughed loudly.

Me: "This isn’t funny, Bee!"

B: "I’m sorry, babe, but it kinda is. You’re twenty-three and all flustered over him saying that. Just f**k him already! After all,you want to do it. How long has it been since you got laid? Three years?. You’re not getting out of it until you let him stick it up in you."

Me: "You’re disgusting."

B: "Tell that to my boyfriend because he's giving me those EYES. Hold on let me move to the bathroom."

Me: "You’re in his house or hotel?"

B:"I thought we're talking about you! How do I come in? We're in a hotel."

Me: "f**k you, Bonnie.”

B:"He already did that for you, don't worry. Give me an hour, am coming."

I hung up and dropped the phone on the floor.

A lot of good that conversation did. She’s such a fantastic friend, confirming what I already knew.

I slid to the floor and grabbed the phone. This time, though, I dialed Mumba’s number.

Her: "What?”

Me: "Are you coming over?"

Her: "About to. Why?"

Me: "Bring alcohol with you."

*****************************************

Mumba: "Who is that?"

Me: "Who’s who?" I rolled my head to the side and look at Mumba.

Her: "That." She jabbed at the screen on her tablet.

Me: "Don’t you mean ‘him’?" I asked, squinting. "Christopher Katongo. He plays for the national team, too."

Her: "Mmm. Do you think your new boy toy could hook me up?"

Me: "Ronald is not my toy," I protested with a sigh. "He’s a very large pain in my ass."

Bonnie: "Yes. Yes, he is." She lay back on the bed next to me and put her feet on the wall. "Large and sexy. I don’t want to know about the butt pain though."

I slapped her hip with the back of my fingers.

Mumba: "Right. Now back to Christopher…" she shoved the iPad in my face. "Do we know where this guy lives?"

Bonnie laughed. "What, are you gonna go over there, knock on his door, and declare yourself available for a good f*****g?"

Mumba blinked. "I was considering it."

"You should," I said, resting the wine cup on my stomach. "God knows among the three of us I am not getting some."

B: "But you have ‘some’ offered to you on a silver plate.”

M: "Some? No, Bee. She has a whole Greek god begging for a kiss and would do anything to get inside her." Mumba said as she grabbed her own cup.

None of us spoke for a few seconds. Then we all laughed loudly.

The phone on the nightstand rang, and Mumba rolled onto her side. "We should probably put the wine down now."

I grabbed the phone and tipped my cup up to show her what I thought of that idea.

“Agreed.” Bonnie tipped hers up, too, giggling, then choked.

"What?" I answered.

“Nikki? Is that you?”

I slammed the phone down on the bed, my eyes widening.

Me:“Oh, f**k!” I whispered.

B: "What?” She hissed.

Me: "Ronald is on the phone."

"I want Christopher’s number!" Mumba said, diving over me to grab it.

Me:“What? No, you crazy b***h!” I held the phone over my head and scrambled down the bed.

She grabbed my leg. I responded by tugging myself away hard, and she let go…leaving me to fall on my ass on the floor.

Ronald:“Uh, hello?”

Me:“Hello.” I giggled into the phone. “I’m sorry. My friends are assholes.”

B:“I didn’t do anything!” Bonnie shouted.

Me:“Shut up!” I whispered across the room. “Hold on,” I said to Ronald.

Mumba:“I thought you didn’t want to talk to him?” Mumba questioned, loudly.

I shot her a warning stare. Geez, what are we, sixteen? Can’t I even get away with pretending I’m in my twenties?

I shut my bedroom door behind me and ran into Mum’s room. “Hello. Sorry. They’re crazy.”

R: "Hey,” he replied, and I could almost hear the smile in his voice. “Can you do me a favor?”

Me: "Um, that depends."

R: “Can you let me in?"

Me: “I’m not home.”

R:“Liar. Your car is packed outside.”

Me:“Mumba gave me a ride to her place.”

R:“Yeah?”

Me: “Yeah.” I nodded.

R:“You know we’re not talking on your cell, don’t you?”

I snapped my head around to look at the phone. s**t, I stared right at the silver house phone. “Oh. Well, this is slightly awkward.”

I ran down the stairs and through the house to the front door. His reflection was blurred by the glass of the doors, but he was definitely there.

Wow. He really did mean he wouldn’t give up.

I pulled the door open and looked straight into his eyes. “Hi.”

R: "Hi. You can put the phone down now."

Me:“ "Right.” I said as I stepped back and set the phone in its holder. “What are you doing here?"

He shut the front door behind him “Are you drunk?”

Me:“No!” I pursed my lips when he raised an eyebrow at me. “Maybe a little. A tiny bit.”

He smiled.

Me:“Wine sippy cups,” I explained unnecessarily. C’mon, Nikki. Does he care how you drink your wine?

R:“Right. Anyway, I came to ask you something.”

Me:“Can I say at this point that I’d rather you didn’t? Your questions generally don’t lead anywhere good.”

R:“Fine.” He leaned against the wall and folded his arms across his chest.

Me:“So you’ll go? Fabulous.” I grabbed the door handle, but he was quicker, his fingers closing around my arm.

R:“No,” he said. “If you won’t let me ask you, I’ll tell you.”

Me:“Really?” I stood up straight, snapping my eyes to his. "You’re gonna tell me, huh? And how well do you think that’s gonna work out for you, Bemba boy?"

R: "Probably as well as my attempts to f**k the hell out of you." He leaned forward. “But I’m gonna give it a good shot.”

I stared at him, "I dare you.”

“It’s my friend's birthday tomorrow. His mom is putting on this fancy dinner at the Intercontinental Hotel tomorrow night.”.

Me:“Well, happy birthday to him.”

R:“Funny girl,” he tugged me closer to him. “I want you to come.”

Me: "Translation: you need a date and you want me to be it.”

R:“Nothing gets past you, does it, babe?”

“Not a damn thing.” I smiled sweetly. “And I’m sorry, but I’m busy tomorrow night.”

Mumba: “Doing what?!” Mumba asked from behind us.

Bonnie: "Mumba! WTF!” Bonnie laughed. “You didn't say it correctly." Then turning to us she continues, "she's very free!”

“Uh, I wonder why!” I closed my eyes to take a deep breath. “Of course,” I said stiffly. “Why wouldn’t they be there?” I tugged my arm from Ronald’s hold and stepped away from

him. “You might as well come out, eavesdropping bitches.”

They fought their way through the doorway then untangled themselves.

M:“Hi.” Mumba grinned widely like a love sick puppy.

B:“Hi.” Bonnie echoed, grinning, too.

R:“Hey.”

Me:“Anyway,” I interrupted, “Sorry, but I’m busy. Maybe never, okay?”

B:“Maybe never? Are you insane? Who says no to such a perfectly-built man?”

Me:“I’m sure there’s some one downtown who will kiss that better.”

“Hold up.” Mumba steps forward. “This dinner. Is Christopher going to be there?”

B: "We woke the beast,”

R:“Yeah,” he replied. “Why?”

Mumba smiled widely. “ Give us a moment.” She snatched my arm and pulled me after her. Then she dragged me into the tv room, and Bonnie shut the door behind us.

Me:“What the hell?” I look at Mumba.

M:“Nikki! He will be there!”

Me:“I am not going to dinner with him just so you can get your panties wet.” I folded my arms across my chest.

“Maybe you’ll get yours wet too.” Bonnie’s eyebrows shot up suggestively as she sipped from her wine cup.

I snatched the cup from her and finished its contents. “Nope. Still not feeling the urge.”

“Please, Nikki. We’ll come with you and we’ll keep you away from him,” Mumba begged. “I mean, Bonnie will keep you away from him. Okay? It’s kind of the same thing.”

Me:“You weren’t even invited. I was. And I have no desire to do this.” I looked at them and they had wide smiles on their faces.

Me:“No. You can go, but I won’t.”

My friends looked at me like I had lost my mind, and maybe I had. I opened the door, ignoring Mumba and faced Ronald. “I have things to do, so I shall let you know by morning. Goodday Ronald.”

****************************************

The birthday party was wonderful. I ignored Ronald every time he tried to get me alone. I enjoy s*x as much as the next person but I honestly would be lying to myself and him if I had s*x with him. He was hot, yes but every time I had s*x, only one face popped up in my head. Michael. I enjoy slow, deep lovemaking, and I enjoy hard and fast s*x but I respect it, too. I respect the connection that comes from being so intimate with someone, and I won’t ever lose that. I won’t let it go. s*x is for relationships, for trust and strong feelings, not hurried f***s.

"Babe,I need to see someone outside." Bonnie cut into my thoughts.

Me:"who? Why now? Am following." I needed some air.

B:"I don't think that's a great idea, you can't meet him, like this! Not now!" She said as she got back and grabbed her purse.

Why was she hiding her mystery boyfriend? I had drank too much.

I excused myself and headed out. I stood outside for five minutes before I got into my car and drove off.

I leaned out of the car and pushed the code in for the gates. They opened, and I drove through, desperately wishing my mind could get the hell off Ronald and onto the twenty possible outfits waiting for me on my desk.

I wished I could focus on scarves and neckties, on socks and gloves.

I parked the car in front of the garage and shoveled my keys inside my purse.

"Nikki.”

I turned at the sound of his voice. “What are you doing here?”

Him:“What are you doing here?”

Ronald responded, slamming his car door.

Me:“I live here.” My jaw clenched.

He walked towards me. I swallowed as he got closer because, although it’s dark, I could see his facial expression. The light from the house gave me a full view of his tight jaw, his pursed lips, his strong cheekbones. The annoyance in his gaze pushed me back and I

wondered how he was the one who was annoyed when I was the one he always pissed off.

When he reached me, he grabbed me and pushed me against the wall, his fingers sliding into my hair and his mouth descending on mine.

He’s stronger than I am, and he held me in place as his lips attacked me. I gripped his shirt at his waist, curling my fingers into the soft material.

He tugged on my hair and his

tongue slipped into my mouth when my lips parted.

My p***y clenched at the deepness of the kiss, at the way he controlled it so powerfully.

He pulled away and looked me in the eye, breathing heavily. “Don’t ever walk away from me like that again.”

“Or what?” I replied ,putting as much strength into my voice as I could.

He touched the tip of his nose to mine. “Or I’ll be forced to f**k you on the spot.”

He closed his mouth over mine once more then untangled his fingers from my hair and walked back to his car. I watched his powerful stride swallow up the driveway. He yanked open his car door and looked right at me.

“I’ll pick you up at four o’clock tomorrow. Be ready. I hate waiting.”

“What for?” I shouted as he sat in the car.

He didn’t reply. He simply turned the car around, and drove out.

I watched him disappear through the gates and into the darkness, my heart still fighting to break free from my ribs, and let out a long, shaky breath.

I’ve only been kissed that way, once. By Michael. Only he would walk toward me with so much determination and kiss me until I couldn’t breathe.

How could two guys be alike in that area? Or was my mind playing games on me? Making me think and see what wasn't there.

I opened the door with a shaky hand and locked it. Mum was in the kitchen, and she watched as I kicked off my shoes, leaving them scattered in the hallway.

“Nikki, are you okay, honey? You’re back early.”

Me:“Yeah.” I walked through the room without stopping.“ Just have a lot to do for Chanda.”

Her:“All right. Goodnight.”

Me:“Night, Mum.” I ran up the stairs and slammed my door behind me.

I leaned against it and closed my eyes. He left me in the dust with a simple demand and wet panties.

I took a deep breath and threw my purse on my bed.

I ripped my dress over my head and threw an oversized green Zambian jersey on before heading to my desk. Then I opened Chanda’s file with a smile on my face.