THE ARGUMENT
1070 Words
AVA
I sat at the long dining table, my eyes fixed on my untouched plate. My appetite was long gone.
The air felt heavier tonight, pressing down my chest like a heavy weight.
The clicking sound of my father's cutleries was enough to fill the silence between us.
Another night of suffocating expectations.
“Ava” my father says, his voice cold and sharp.
I clenched my fists under the table. “Yes, Dad?”
His gaze pierces through me with heavy disappointment.
“Do you have an actual plan for yourself”
Here we go again.
Forcing my voice to stay calm, I bit the inside of my cheek and inhaled deeply.
“I'm going to be a writer, that's why I chose
literature”
His scoff was immediate,
“Literature?” He leans back on his chair, swirling the wine in his glass.
“And you plan to write what exactly? Fairy tales? Wasting your life while the real world moves on without you”.
The words sting, but I keep my face neutral. Showing weakness would only make my sister happy.
My throat tightens” it's what I love”
His expression darken as if I confessed to commiting a crime. "Love doesn't pay bills, love doesn't build a future. Do you actually think this nonsense of yours would get you anywhere?"
My eyes twitched
My older sister, Eleanor, smirks, dabbing at the corner of her mouth with a silk napkin. "Honestly, Dad, I don't know why you're surprised. Ava has always been nothing but a disappointment."
A disappointment.
The words hit like a slap,but I refuse to let it show on my face. I should be used to it by now, the hurtful words, the abuse I should be numb to. Somehow it still gets under my skin, carving wounds I can't seem to heal.
" She could have studied law" My father continues as if I'm not here. " Like you, like I wanted. But no, she insisted on chasing a foolish dream with a useless outcome."
He sets his glass down with a sharp clink. " You're useless".
I bit the bottom of my lip, trying to hold back my tears. I glanced at my mother, searching for Even a flicker of defense on my Behalf. A word, a Glance maybe, something.
But she keeps her eyes on her plate, hands folded neatly in her lap. The perfect image of a submissive housewife. In this house, silence is a virtue.
The knot of my stomach tightens, the air suddenly feels too thick, the room too small, too suffocating.
" I asked you a question Ava" my father pressed, his voice now full of irritation.
I swallowed the lump in my throat, " And I answered it".
His jaw clenches. " You call that an answer?" He scoffs.
I dig my nails into my palm, Breathing slowly. "I don't know what else you want from me. I cannot study what you want, I'm chasing the dream that I love"
" I want you to wake up" he snaps. " To stop acting like a dumb child. This world is not kind to people like you. You think passion is enough? Do you think that dream of yours would put food on the table? You're playing a losing game child, and I won't have any daughter of mine make a fool of this family."
Something inside me snaps
I push my chair back, legs Scraping against the marble floor, the sound slicing through the tension in the air.
My father's eyes narrow at me. " Sit down"
I managed to hold my fumbling hands " No" I snapped.
" I won't sit here and listen to this anymore".
Eleanor chuckles under her breath, a mocking sound. " And where do you think you're going, little sister? Must you always be stubborn and disobedient."
She's wrong.
I don't know where I'm going but I know I can't stay here.
His voice hardens. " You walk out of this house, Ava, don't bother coming back".
A warning. A promise.
The naive Ava would have hesitated, would have let the fear of being cast out chain me to this house and this life.
But not tonight.
I met his gaze, my voice finally steady. " Watch me".
I expect my mother to flinch. To beg me to stay, to break the silence she has wrapped herself in for years. But she doesn't move, she doesn't even look at me.
I scoffed, I'll never be like her.
I turned on my heel and walked away, my footsteps echoing through the cold hallway. I won't stop. I don't look back.
As I step out into the night, the cold air sweeps at my skin. The weight of their judgement presses against my back, suffocating me.
But for the first time, I don't let it hold me down,
For the first time I feel free.
The city hums with life, light flickering, laughter erupting from bars and clubs. I don't know where I'm going, but I know I won't stop.
I walk till I find myself outside of a club, The naive Ava would never be found around such surroundings. The fear of ruining her father's reputation would prick her. But not anymore.
Fuck them and their opinions. I walked into the club, music bursting from left and right, strippers on the stage dancing, men yelling and spraying them with money.
I started to rethink my decisions. I shrugged the thought. I don't care. I took a seat at the bar and motioned for the waiter.
“ Give me something strong,” I said.
“ Can you handle it?” He asked, confused.
“ Are you going to give it to me or not?” I said sternly.
The bartender hesitates but serves me a glass.
I take a sip, wincing at the burn.
“They wished she was the only child they had”
A laugh escaped me, it was sharp and bitter. I wasn’t drunk enough for this.
I run my hands through my hair,
They think wanting something different makes me broken. Whereas,all I want to do is write and live on my own terms, not chained to theirs.
“ I don’t know how to give up”
I mutter to myself.
“Talking to yourself is either a sign of genius… or a sign of madness.”
- Writer
