How to Hate Your Crush - My Teacher is the Devil

Chapter 5

   “How to Make Your Crush Notice You”. I turned through the pages eagerly, though I had no hopes of success. The only other person I live with is my father, and he usually respects my privacy, however, just as a measure to ensure I won’t suffer any kind of embarrassment, I sat with my back against the closed bedroom door. I never thought I would ever be reading one of these magazines… Do these tips even apply to someone like Mr. Brady?

            1. Flirt with him. Laugh at all his jokes, even if they are not funny. Also, drop some hints to get the message across, such as winking.

No way I’m doing this. I can’t even get near him, much less flirt with him.

            2. Make physical contact. Touching him gently in social situations will signal that you do not just simply want to be friends.

I’d say we have already crossed all sorts of barriers on the physical contact spectrum. Any more of it and the law will have to interfere.

            3. Be in the same place as him to make him feel like you’re always around. Act as if it is a coincidence but be careful not to be too obvious.

I already pretty much do this. Any more of it and I’ll be a stalker.

Despite the ridiculousness of the other tips and guides, the last one caught my attention. I read over it a couple of times and wondered if it could work. I have always avoided Mr. Brady out of embarrassment, but what if I try to pretend like I am angry? He will definitely be curious. But… once again, with this man I can never tell what will work; he is more of a demon than a human.

            4. Give him some space. It is said that love grows with distance. Pretend to ignore him and act mad. This will make him eager to find out why you are acting this way and will make him more attracted to you.

I have got to try it out, but it won’t be easy. He always finds a way to trap me… And what if it goes wrong and he becomes angry at me? I shook my head and pumped my fists: I have got to try!

~~

The next day, at school, my heart was burning with excitement to put my new experiment to test – or was it fear? But anyhow, I forced myself to ignore Mr. Brady and avoid him as much as possible. I succeeded in staying clear of him for the entire day, but I could not tell whether or not he even noticed it. It is like a ghost playing hide-and-seek with someone who cannot see it. What is even the point? However, I persisted and kept this plan going. He eventually must realize something is up… I hope.

And so, he did. The next day, he called out to me after class. I lowered my head and pretended not to hear, proceeding in my way out of his classroom. The following day, he called me once again. I smiled to myself as I walked away, knowing that my plan was working. Those magazines do have some useful tips after all. However, this time, Mr. Brady chased after me. Hence, I ran into the bathroom to hide from him. That was way too obvious… Anyhow, I do want him to think I am upset. I rested my back on the wall and clenched a hand onto my chest, feeling my heart pound – not from the running, but from a heavy conscience. No matter how rewarding it is to know that he does, in fact, notice me and my actions, I cannot help feeling guilty – as well as scared. What if he is only calling out to me to discuss school-related subjects? What if he puts me on his blacklist and lowers my grades? I shivered at the image of his mischievous grin that reproduced itself in my mind.

“Ellison.” Mr. Brady called out to me on the fourth day as I walked across his classroom. His tone was stricter than usual.

Despite the shivers that produced goosebumps all over my body, I pumped my fists and persevered. Just a couple more days. I repeated to myself. I must be strong. Thus, I lowered my head, avoiding eye contact, and walked past him. He called me again in the hallway and I ignored him once more. I hesitated for a second and wondered if I was wrong to do this as a student, but he is my teacher and that did not stop him from teasing me and kissing me. It hurts, but I must endure it. I must make him think that I do not care about him.

I met with my friends for lunch but did not talk much, thinking upon my actions and Mr. Brady’s reaction. Noy awoke me from my trance as she noticed I was not carrying my bag. I looked around my seat as I looked for it and realized I left it in the History classroom. I finished eating as fast as I could, and I immediately went back inside by myself. However, while I was walking down the hall, before I could reach the classroom, I felt a pair of strong hands grab me by the waist. They pulled me and I struggled to keep my balance until I was pushed against a wall.

I had closed my eyes from the impact, but as soon as I opened them, I saw that I was in Mr. Brady’s classroom and he was leaning onto me, trapping me against the cold surface. His expression appeared to be filled with rage as he observed me furiously. Had the trick worked, or is he simply angry because, as a student, I have been disrespecting a teacher?

I looked up at him fixedly, unassured, and timidly, unsure of what to say or do – or if it was best to remain frozen so not to arouse any more rage. The first question that appeared in my mind was whether he was going to kiss me again, for our faces were nearly touching, but with such an expression, it seems more likely that he would kill me instead.

“What do you think you’re doing?” he growled. He paused for a moment, staring at me intently, but I had the feeling that speaking would only make it worse. “Ignoring me like this… You’re really looking for a punishment, aren’t you?” Suddenly his grimace morphed into a grin more horrid than ever. All the hairs on my body rose and I shivered in place, frightened by this dreadful countenance.

Mr. Brady pushed me even more aggressively against the wall and brutally smacked his lips onto mine. He strongly pressed his body against mine and leaned his hand on the wall beside my head. This kiss is much more passionate than the others… Is it because I ignored him? Does this mean my plan worked? But all he does is kiss me; he never tells me what he thinks of me. No matter, even if I do not understand his feelings and intentions, I cannot stop him. Truthfully, I do not want to.

A hand that was on my hip slivered its way upward until it slid under my shirt. Its warmth caressed my waist, but soon grew greedy, creeping upwards. My eyes widened and I tried pushing him away, but he kept pressing himself against me. The hand persisted and nearly reached my chest when I regained my strength and managed to push him away. Our lips separated and I frowned at him.

“What’s wrong? You’re not trying to provoke me anymore?” Mr. Brady smirked eerily.

Huh? He knew of my intentions?

“You need to be punished,” he nibbled on my ear, “don’t you think?”

“Stop.” I begged as he bit my neck, his hand almost reaching my chest. “Please, stop!”

“You’ve provoked me, and now you will pay for it.” he threatened in a devilish tone. “I’ll give you a private biology lesson.” Mr. Brady whispered into my ear.

The hand finally slipped under my bra. I squirmed, struggling to free myself. Once more, a tear ran down my cheek. I did not care if he would think I am a crybaby, for I am always crying. I just wanted to break free. Even though he is the man I love, I do not want this. Mr. Brady noticed me crying and released me from his grasp. His hand slipped out of my bra and the grin on his cheeks faded away. He wrapped one arm around me and pulled me tightly towards his chest. The other hand landed on the back of my head, stroking and petting my hair. Despite it all, it calmed me down. Thus, I accepted the embrace and clenched onto him, letting my tears fall against his chest.

“You don’t need to do these things to get my attention.” he half-whispered in a soft tone. “You already have it.”

I lifted my head and looked up into his eyes, wondering what he meant. They were warm and shone as they met with mine, and I could not believe this gentle face fostering such a reassuring smile was harassing me just now. What could he have meant? I’ve already his attention? He only gives me attention when it is to tease me; besides that, he ignores me. I just cannot figure him out. I buried my face in his sculpted chest, frustrated with the question in my mind: should I trust him? Is he a gentle angel as his eyes     appear to be, or is he a devilish fiend whose art is to deceive?

“Mr. Brady?” I said as my lips appeared to move on their own.

“Hm?”

All in all, good and bad, no matter how much he annoys me or how much he toys with me, one thing is still true:

“I love you.” I said into his chest. The words came out much more naturally than the first time. For some reason, I felt like I had to say it again, maybe half-hoping that he would give me answer.

But he didn’t.

Mr. Brady blew out air from his nose as if he were smiling and placed his other arm around me as well, hugging me tighter.

“Just be yourself.” he said in a cool, and soothing tone. “That’s all you need to do to get my attention.”

He discarded my assertion, but somehow, I was pleased with his answer. I felt at ease and a new warmth and light grew within me. Like a new hope rising, I smiled and lost myself in his embrace, hoping this moment would never end. How he makes me feel like this after causing me great pain I do not know, but it was enough to make me happy, and to make me fall in love with him over and over again.