Her Impossible Mate

16- Say It

...Raine...

The scent of pancakes attacks my nose as I stretch out of my deep slumber. I blink a few times to adjust to the sun beating through the curtains and rub the sleep from my eyes. At the realisation I'm definitely not in my own bed, I bolt upright. Looking around the room, I see the traditional country decor. My face screws up at the unexpected surroundings- too much wood and magnolia for my liking.

And then I remember how I got here. Zander.

I take a peek under the covers and am relieved to see I'm still wearing last nights leggings and shirt. My bag sits on an old rocking chair in the corner. I head over for a scrunchie to tie up my hair into a messy bun, before venturing out of the room.

I tiptoe around for fear of disturbing the silence. My eyes are assaulted with more cottage decor- cutesy flowers embroidered everywhere and far too much natural wood on show again. 

Following my nose leads me into a traditional cottage kitchen. Zander is busy cooking, dressed in uncharacteristically casual clothes. I lean against the door frame and admire him in the new surroundings.

The radio plays as he flips the pancakes and stacks them high. He seems more relaxed, like a weight has been lifted and is left behind in the city. His usually slicked back hair is ruffled into soft waves and the bop along to the beat of the music. Wait, is he whistling?

I break a little smile at this new side of him just as he looks up and beams with a childish grin.

"Hungry?" Even his voice seems less strained. It's sweet, really. I nod and head over to the breakfast bar across from him. He dishes up the perfect plate of pancakes and slides it over to me. 

"So, you cook?" I ask as I dig in, my stomach already rumbling.

"My mother would be offended you think otherwise." He plates up his own serving and joins me at the breakfast bar.

I take another bite with an 'mmm' of satisfaction. As I chew, I take a look out of the kitchen window. Fields and forest stretch as far as I can see, with several luxury looking cabins scattered around.

"Where are we?" I frown out at the unusual sight. It's been years since I've seen this much open space. We must be far from the city.

"This is our pack land." He continues to chew down his breakfast as he talks. "We have this available for our pack whenever they need it. For a break or a place to shift and run free away from prying eyes." I nod along. "We also use it for traditional things- births, marriages and death. And whenever we initiate new members to the pack." 

"Do you do that often?" I glance sideways, still fascinated by this relaxed side of him.

"Not much these days. I suppose you don't know much about our pack, huh?" He twists to face me. I give him a shrug and side smile in agreement.

"Well, I guess you should. Everyone who works at Crescent Corp is a member of the pack but not all of the pack work at Crescent Corp. We have our traditions, but they are free to live their lives. The business offers them the opportunity to earn money. We also have apartment blocks in a designated part of the city where people can choose to live. There are no obligations, though. We really just support one another. We are a family." I let his words sink in. The situation sounds like a win-win, but with my experience of pack life, it seems too good to be true. 

"I work at Crescent Corp, and I'm not a member of the pack." I smirk smugly, and he quirks his brow. 

"You're special." He shrugs and returns to eating his pancakes.

After the cleanup, Zander heads off to do some emails and calls. It turns out that as the boss, the work never stops. He promises not to take long and tells me to explore and relax.

I take the opportunity to head out into the wilderness. My hands run over the rough bark of the trees as I explore the forest. The last time I was in a forest like this would have been back at my old pack. 

Taking advantage of the space and the privacy, I decide it's time to break my shifting abstinence. It feels like months since my last shift, the opportunities few and far between in the city.  

I strip down and tuck my clothes below a tree. Grounding my feet, I take a deep breath in preparation for the change. You would think breaking and reforming every bone in my body would be excruciating, but really it feels incredibly satisfying. More than anything, the release as I embrace the animal inside is incredible.

I shake my fur free, my paws pressing firmly into the dirt beneath me. The control is now transferred to my wolf, and she wants to run. I take off through the trees, dodging and jumping over obstacles with ease. The wind whistles past my ears and dances through my fur as I run faster and push myself harder.  

Time is of no concern to my wolf as she embraces the freedom she has craved for so long. Only when the sky starts to turn at dusk do I realise how long I've been gone. 

Panicked at the lost time, I speed back to my clothes, shift into human form and sprint back to the cabin.

Bursting through the door, I worry that my extended absence has annoyed Zander. The kitchen and lounge area is quiet, lit dimly with some lamps. 

Zander strolls casually into the dining area, a warm smile at my return. 

"I'm so sorry. I just lost track of time." My words are rushed as I still try to calm my breathing from my rush back to the cabin.

"It's fine, Raine. I assumed you were just having fun. These lands are protected. You're safe here." I blow out a sigh of relief, placing my hands on my hips as I try to regulate my heart rate from the run. 

"Besides, work took longer than I hoped. I did tell them to leave me alone but..."

"You're the boss." I finish his sentence, and he just shrugs.

"Do you like it? Being the boss?" I scan over his pensive face. He looked so relaxed this morning, but already a few hours of work has his face tensed with stress. 

"If we're doing the deep questions, I'm going to need a drink." He ruffles his hand through his hair. It seems like he is covering his feelings with humour, but I give him a light chuckle.

"Get changed, and I'll get the wine." While I have always disliked being told what to do, my body responds instantly to Zander's commands. I hurry to the bedroom to get into something more comfortable.

Skimming through my options, I smirk to myself at the skimpy red shorts set I had packed. I chew at my lip, debating if I should be so bold.

The fire, wine and this seductive set might push us into dangerous waters. But who doesn't crave a little danger? 

I slip into it and brush out the tangles in my hair from my shift. My heart thumps in my chest, knowing that going out there dressed like this would send a signal... F*ck it.

I enter the living room to the pleasant warmth of the crackling fire just as Zander finishes pouring the wine. He looks up, and instantly his eyes devour me. I stand confidently under his hungry stare, his apparent desire making me feel brave.

"You remember what I said about packing clothes with little fabric?" His voice is rough, causing my stomach to flutter. 

"I do." I stalk over to him. His jaw tenses at my approach, his chest rising and falling more clearly with deep breaths. 

He hands me the glass and takes some measured steps back to create space between us. I quirk my eyebrow in surprise.

"You said we had to get to know each other." He sits and signals for me to do the same. I'm disappointed that this hasn't had the intended effect. But I can't fault him for respecting my earlier boundary. 

We start with casual conversation then take turns to ask questions. The wine flows, as does the conversation.

"Favourite colour?"

"Red."

"Convenient. Favourite food?"

"Steak, you?"

"Anything with chocolate. Favourite season..."

And so the questioning continues. Trying to keep up with Zander's drinking is trickier than expected. Ending up a few glasses of wine past my limit, I feel the urge to get riskier with my questions. After reading up on Zander's track record with women, one very personal question is at the forefront of my mind. 

"Ok. I've got a good question." He raises his eyebrows expectantly. "How many s****l partners have you had?" His eyes darken at the question, his body tensing in discomfort.

"Raine. I don't think this is a good line of questioning for either of us." His tone is firm and cold.

"Why?" I pout, my voice a whiny pitch. 

"You want to tell me how many you've had?" He sits taller, his casual demeanour disappearing.

"Why? Will you be mad?" My words start to slur, and the exaggerated gesturing of my hands causes the wine to slosh around the glass.

"Raine. That's enough." His tone is almost threatening. If I wasn't so drunk, I would have obeyed.

"It's fine. Cami says if they don't make you come, it doesn't count. I'm practically the Virgin Mary!" I cackle at the words, the admission not even phasing me in my drunken state. 

Zander's angry frown drops away to confusion. He looks over me as he absorbs my confession. Finally, under the pressure of his judging gaze, my words start to sink in, and I realise what I have just brazenly declared. 

My confidence falters, and my cheeks start to flush. Trying desperately to avoid his stare, I gulp at the remnants of wine in my glass.

"I think that's enough for you, huh." In my drunken haze, I hadn't even notice Zander stand and move towards me. He pulls the glass gently from my hand and sets it on the coffee table. His eyes have returned to their bright blue, his rigidity relaxed.

He helps me to stand, and I stumble slightly as the room starts to spin. I groan in the dizziness as Zander helps guide me to my room.

I flop myself onto the bed with a groan, and Zander chuckles behind me.

"C'mon you." His hands reach around and lift me into the correct position, then he pulls the covers over me as I wriggle into place.

"Do I have to put you to bed every night now?" I chuckle as he tucks me in. 

"I think it's the reason I slept so well last night. My personal tucker inner." I giggle, my words hardly making sense.

He raises his eyebrows and gives me a sarcastic 'mhmm' before he turns to leave.

"Wait!" I shout before he can leave my room. He turns back with a confused frown. "You could stay?" His face relaxes as he walks back to the bed. He leans over and places a soft kiss on my head.

"Not tonight, my love. Not like this." His voice is soft, and he caresses my cheek. I shrink back into bed, embarrassed at his rejection. I really have made a fool of myself tonight. He kisses my head again then leaves. 

I roll over and curl into a ball. Despite my distress at his rejection and my intimate confession, sleep is quick to take over. The alcohol overrides the shame. My vision clouds in darkness as I fade into a restless slumber.

I wake early from the not so peaceful sleep. I grumble at the memories of last night. Note to self: never drink again.

Desperate for water, I sneak out of the room to the kitchen. Zander is nowhere to be seen, thankfully. 

To make up for my drunken antics, I decide to make breakfast. Thumbing through the cupboards, I gather the ingredients I think I need.

Despite my best efforts with the pancake batter, the consistency looks all wrong. I sigh defeatedly and rub at my pounding head. 

I continue to stir, hoping to save this disaster. Zander enters, laughing at my screwed-up face spooning up my lumpy batter.

"Need some help?" I sigh again, fighting the urge to ping the mixture at his smug face. He comes up behind me, his hands resting on my hips and places a kiss on my exposed shoulder. The contact feels natural like we've behaved like this before. He spins me around to him, his brow furrowed in concern as he scans over me.

"How are you feeling?" His hands rest casually on my hips as I chew awkwardly at my lip.

"Sore head but otherwise fine. That's what I get for trying to keep up with you." He smiles and locks me in place as his hands land on the counter at either side of me. 

I become sheepish at the thought of embarrassing myself last night. "I'm sorry if I was... a bit much last night." His face falls as we stand in silence for a few moments. He probably thinks I'm pathetic.

"Did you mean what you said last night? About your s****l partners?" He quizzes me while I'm trapped between his arms. I avoid his gaze, and my cheeks flush in embarrassment that I had been so open about anything s****l. His finger slides below my chin and pulls my gaze from the floor. I feel the heat of my cheeks, so my embarrassment must be evident.

"You know that is nothing to do with you and entirely to do with them?" His voice is soothing though this topic is uncomfortable. I fight against his finger holding my head up, desperate to shrink away from this conversation. He keeps his hold on me, his thumb now brushing over my bottom lip, pulling it down.

"They didn't please you, Raine." His voice is rough and hungry. "I don't need to have s*x with you to please you. I swear I could make you come without even unzipping my pants, if you let me." My breathing picks up at his suggestion. My stomach twisting in anxiety and excitement. His thumb has continued its path from my lip down my chin and tickled down my throat. His hand now sits loosely around my neck, and I gulp as heat floods through me.

"Is that what you want, Raine?" His voice sends shivers down my spine. My mouth is dry as I draw in ragged breaths. No s*x, just my pleasure? Sounds perfect to me. Words fail me, so all I can muster is a slow nod, my eyes fixed on his. 

"Say it." He commands. "Tell me what you want." I gulp again, desperate to find the words to give him my consent.

"I- I want you to m-make me come." I feel relief at the ability to verbalise my desires. My permission is granted, and a throbbing of anticipation courses through my core. I know if anyone can take me over the edge, it is most definitely him.

He smirks deviously as his grip on my neck closes. I gasp at the firmness of his hold, yet it only offers me pleasure. With his hand wrapped around my neck, he pulls me into a heated kiss. There is no build up, only passion. Our tongues swirl together, though this time, I let him take the lead. I'm at his mercy. 

He grunts in approval, sensing my submission. His hand releases my neck but travels south and sweeps over my ass. His other hand matches the motion as he pulls me up roughly. My legs wrap around his waist as his hands grip dominantly at the curve of my ass. Our kiss never breaks as my hands tangle into a firm hold of his hair. 

He walks us through to his bedroom without breaking our connection. Leaning forward, he places me gently on the bed. He climbs over me, hands either side of my head as he holds his muscular frame just above me. Grunts and groans of satisfaction rumble out his mouth as his groin grinds against mine. I feel every inch of him, and f*ck, it feels big.

Finally, he slows to a stop and pulls back to gaze down at me. I sigh at the loss of his lips on mine, tipping my head back in the hopes they would reconnect. He smirks down at my desperation.

"Are you sure you want this?" His voice is raspy from the heat of our kiss. I nod again, my hand already twisted into his hair to pull his face back down to mine. His eyes darken. "Use your words, Raine."

My chest heaves with lust, desperate to continue this passionate exchange.

"I want this. I want you." My fist tightens in his hair, and he licks his lips at my words. He stands abruptly, and I prop myself up with my elbows under me, confused at his sudden movement.

He pulls his shirt over his head, revealing his mouth-watering physique. My eyes bulge at the sight of his chiselled muscles, intricate ink detailing his hard chest. His finger curls at me and signals for me to sit up. I obey, and his hands find the hem of my tank top just as I straighten up. He pulls it quickly over my head, my breasts bouncing free from the tight fabric.

"F*ck." He growls out as he adjusts his erection through his pants. He climbs back down next to me, his hand placed gently on my stomach. My skin sets on fire at the placement, desperate for it to move to more intimate spaces. He obliges as his hand travels up and brushes over my hardened n*pple. He engages me in another kiss as his large hand massages gently at my breast. He pinches sharply at my n*pple, causing me to gasp free of his lips.

"I want to hear what feels good. Tell me what you want." I gasp again as he pinches my n*pple even sharper this time.

"I- I want your fingers inside me." My voice is a whisper, my back arching at the thought. Zander chuckles as he teasingly runs his fingers down my naked torso.

"Patience, my love. I want to build to you up for release." I groan in disagreement but quickly stop as his finger rub at my sweet spot through the fabric of my shorts. He places sucks and kisses down my neck to my chest before engulfing my n*pple in his warm mouth. I wriggle at the pleasurable tingles spreading through my body. His light rubbing over my shorts continues, but I crave the feel of his fingers running through my slick folds directly.  

He catches on, and finally, he pulls the shorts down. I buck my hips to allow room for them to slip under and kick them down my legs.

He still teases as his hand rubs up my thigh, slowly creeping close to the desired spot. Finally, two of his fingers dip slightly into my needy opening. I hum at the contact as he groans beside me.

"You're so wet for me, Raine." I hum again in agreement, desperate for him to push deeper. "What do you want?" He asks, voice deep and rough.

"Go deeper." He grunts in approval of my request and bends to my will. He slowly pushes his fingers deeper, my back arches again at the feel of him inside me. His fingers curls and slowly push against my walls. This marvellous man appears to have found the spot instantly, causing a small squeak to escape from my mouth. I feel my body climbing steadily to the cliff's edge. I want more; I need more.

"Faster." I breathe, and again he follows my instructions. His fingers move in and out at a smooth pace. He builds his speed, and my body hums under his rhythm. Whines and moans break free despite my efforts to hold them back. 

He slides his fingers out and through my folds to my precious bundle of nerves. My breathing accelerates as he circles my little nub, smooth and steady. The climb continues, my body's reaction spurring him on. He circles faster, and I feel my body shudder on the precipice of release.

"Let go, Raine." I crumble at his command as I finally allow myself to fall over the edge. 

"I'm- I'm coming." I shout out as my body shatters beneath me. A warm gush of release floods through my folds and onto Zander's hand as his fingers dip back in. He groans in approval but doesn't stop his tantalising movements. Wave after wave crashes over me, a feeling of ecstasy I could never even dream of. I clench around his fingers in uncontrollable bursts of euphoria. My body jerks involuntarily as my eyes roll back into my head. 

Zander's movements slow as my body movements calm. Finally, he removes his fingers, and I let out a sigh of exhaustion. He moves his soaked fingers to his mouth and places them inside. Slowly, he pulls them out with a deep rumble of pleasure.

"F*cking delicious." His throaty voice is so attractive. I blush ferociously at the thought of how much of me is on him as he dips his fingers back in his mouth to continue the cleanup.

I curl myself up and bury my face into his bare chest. The sudden realisation of what has happened and the nakedness of my body overwhelms me. He brushes a lock of hair behind my ear and places a tender kiss on my head.

"You are breathtaking. I will never get enough of watching you come undone." I giggle with embarrassment as he just holds me for a few minutes, rubbing soothing circles on my back.

He stands and reaches for his t-shirt. Pulling me to sit, he slips it over my head. Thankfully, his tall and broad frame means it covers my modesty. He beams from above me and grabs my hand to pull me to stand.

"Shall I sort out those pancakes now?" His tone mocks me, and I chuckle as I playfully push at his shoulder.

This weekend has been perfect so far. Seeing Zander in this context, free to be himself, has been good for my heart. And one thing is painfully clear- I am hopelessly addicted to Zander Heroux.