Chapter 5
1166 Words
“Try this one.”
I looked up from the ceremony invitations spread across the dining table as Damon held up a deep blue piece of fabric toward Selene.
Selene wrinkled her nose playfully. “That colour would make me look dead.”
Kael snorted. “You’re impossible to shop for.”
“I didn’t ask you to buy me anything.”
“Yeah, but Damon apparently adopted you.”
Damon grinned unapologetically while Elias shook his head from across the table.
The entire dining hall buzzed with Winter Moon Ceremony preparations.
Flowers covered nearly every surface while servants rushed between tables carrying candles, fabrics, and decorations. The pack had spent years anticipating my mating ceremony.
Yet somehow…
I no longer felt part of it.
“Lyra?”
I blinked as Magnus looked toward me from the head of the table.
“What colours did you choose for your ceremony dress?”
Every conversation seemed to pause.
Waiting.
I opened my mouth.
Then realised I had not even thought about it.
Not properly.
Because every time I tried lately, something else happened.
Selene smiled softly. “Silver would suit her.”
The room instantly agreed.
“Yes, definitely silver.”
“White too.”
“She’d look beautiful in white.”
I forced a smile while my stomach twisted painfully.
This was supposed to be my moment.
My ceremony.
My birthday.
Yet somehow Selene had become involved in every single part of it.
“Actually,” Damon leaned back casually in his chair, “we’re taking Selene into town later.”
I frowned slightly before I could stop myself.
“For what?”
Kael shrugged. “She needs proper clothes.”
“And she’s never seen the Winter Market before,” Damon added.
Selene looked uncomfortable instantly. “I told them they didn’t need to do that.”
“You barely own anything,” Rowan said calmly from beside her.
Again.
Beside her.
My chest tightened.
Usually Rowan sat beside me during family dinners.
Now it had become normal for Selene to be there instead.
Nobody even questioned it anymore.
“We could all go,” Elias suggested suddenly.
For one brief second, hope flickered weakly inside me.
Something normal.
Something like before.
Then Rowan shook his head.
“Too crowded.”
The hope vanished instantly.
Selene lowered her eyes. “I don’t want to cause problems.”
“You’re not,” Rowan replied immediately.
I looked down at the invitations spread across the table because suddenly I could not bear watching them.
“Lyra?”
I glanced up.
Damon frowned slightly. “You okay?”
“Fine.”
“You seem quiet lately.”
Before I could answer, Selene suddenly stood.
“I should probably leave you all alone.”
“No,” Rowan said instantly.
She hesitated uncertainly. “But this is family stuff.”
The words sliced deeper than she probably intended.
Or maybe exactly as deeply as she intended.
Because I noticed the tiny flicker in her eyes when she said it.
Testing.
Watching.
Rowan exhaled quietly. “You’re staying.”
Something inside my chest cracked slightly hearing the certainty in his voice.
As if there had never even been a question.
Later that afternoon, snow fell softly across the territory while wolves prepared market stalls for the upcoming celebrations.
I stood near the training grounds watching younger wolves spar when Damon approached beside me.
“Still sulking?”
“I’m not sulking.”
“You definitely are.”
I rolled my eyes.
Damon bumped my shoulder lightly. “You know you could’ve come with us.”
Could have.
Not:
we wanted you there.
Something about that difference hurt.
“You’re taking Selene,” I replied quietly.
“So?”
“So…” I looked away. “Nothing.”
Damon studied me carefully.
Then sighed.
“Lyra, she’s been through hell.”
“I know.”
“She needs people around her right now.”
“I know.”
“Then why are you acting like this?”
My chest tightened painfully.
Like this.
As if I was being unreasonable.
As if I was selfish for noticing the way everything was changing around me.
“I’m not acting like anything.”
Damon frowned.
Before he could answer, laughter drifted across the courtyard.
Selene.
Kael walked beside her carrying several shopping bags while Rowan followed behind them both.
The moment Selene spotted me, she smiled brightly.
“We found dresses for your ceremony too.”
My stomach dropped.
“What?”
Damon looked confused. “Rowan asked them to set some aside while we were there.”
I stared at Rowan.
He barely met my eyes.
“You weren’t there,” he said simply.
The words hit like ice against my skin.
You weren’t there.
As though that explained everything.
As though it was normal for another girl to help choose dresses for my mating ceremony.
Selene stepped closer holding one of the silver fabric bags carefully.
“I hope that’s okay,” she said softly.
I stared at the bag.
At her fingers wrapped around it.
At Rowan standing beside her instead of beside me.
And suddenly I felt exhausted.
“No,” I whispered quietly.
Everyone froze.
Even Selene.
I swallowed hard before forcing myself to continue.
“It’s fine.”
But it wasn’t fine.
Nothing about this felt fine anymore.
Kael frowned slightly. “You’re being weird lately.”
The comment stung more than he realised.
Or maybe exactly as much as he intended.
“I’m tired.”
“No,” Kael replied slowly. “You’re jealous.”
Shock flashed across my face.
“Excuse me?”
His jaw tightened slightly.
“Selene’s done nothing except try fitting in here, and you keep acting cold towards her.”
“I have not—”
“She’s scared of upsetting you.”
I stared at him in disbelief.
Because Kael had always been the first person to defend me.
Always.
Even against Rowan.
And now?
Now he was defending Selene.
Damon shifted awkwardly beside me while Elias looked uncomfortable.
But nobody corrected Kael.
Nobody defended me.
Not even Rowan.
That hurt worst of all.
I stepped backward slowly.
“You know what?” I forced a small smile despite the burning behind my eyes. “Forget it.”
“Lyra,” Rowan finally said my name.
But his voice sounded tired.
Not concerned.
Tired.
Like I was becoming difficult.
That broke something inside me completely.
I turned away before anyone could see the tears gathering in my eyes.
As I walked back toward the estate, voices drifted softly from nearby pack girls standing beside the courtyard fountain.
“Selene’s beautiful.”
“She fits in surprisingly well.”
“I think she’s softer than Lyra.”
“Honestly? I can see why the brothers like her.”
Their laughter followed me all the way back inside.
And for the first time in ten years…
Blackthorne territory no longer felt like home.
- Writer
