Learning How To Fall

Facts about me

A few facts about me, I love flowers and I hate bees. Hating bees may mean that I'm scared of them, well because they sting but hating bees indirectly implies that I hate how the flower population thrives. As such, loving flowers and hating bees can't be both true at the same time.I love flowers so I pick them and neatly arrange them in a vase and leave them to die. I love rain but when it starts I seek shelter. I am a moving breathing tangled mass of paradoxes. I love gift wrapping because I am good at packing emotions into neat little boxes and giving them away and truly forget what they are till they visit one Monday afternoon and I do not recognise them but they look oddly familiar.

My point is, I've never known how to feel. I have never learnt how to feel and I have equally never been taught how to. As a result, when I fell for Akhe there was no doubt that I would not know what to do. We have been in the same class since Grade 9 by then he was just another addition to the class.In grade 10 I started knowing him as the boy who was always in trouble, By grade 11 we had become friends.

During lunchtime or whenever we had a free period and he hadn't gone to see one of his many friends he would sit with me and tell me about the girl that stayed across his home that he had a crush on. We would then devise strategies on how he would ask her out. I enjoyed this a lot because although I had been labeled ugly and undesirable in high school I still was a lover of love. I had accepted that it was something I would never receive but I always made sure to listen to my friends when talking about their crushes and the boys that were approaching them ,and I could already tell when two people liked each other way before they even knew.

Later in the academic year as I was leaving the classroom, he blocked the exit and confessed how he had fallen in love with me. I laughed it off and told him he was good at telling jokes and suggested we spoke about his crush instead. "leave her out of this, it is you I want, can't you see?" I was rendered speechless, eventually he made way and I went to meet Emily, at the moment we had been friends since I switched high schools and it had been slightly over two years. We spoke about the numerous boys who were interested in her while I subconsciously thought of what Akhe had said. On our ride back home he was all I could think about.

Let me paint this picture for you, I wore small framed glasses, my hair was rarely kept, my school shoes were always dusty although I polished them every morning and to put the cherry on top, I am very dark in complexion.

On the other hand he was so neat,tall dark and a bad boy, and yes I didn't beat the allegations. Good girls always fall for bad boys.Did I mention his eyes?He had the prettiest eyes. One look at them and I could see our future painted, A comfortable home with a huge backyard for the kids to play. I didn't know what our profession would be then but I knew he loved and I loved him, so no matter where we were, we would always be wealthy.