The Rogue Lycan's Mate

Chasing Echoes

With the intimate lying position we had for all night, Alva and I, we both flinched as we saw our faces inches away from one another while waking up. After bursting into a laughter, we both realized how we needed a laugh like that. We had our breakfast at the balcony of our suit, can't say I could ever get tired of its view. From where we were sitting at, I could see many monuments. I liked this city already but it is a pity that we have to leave here as soon as Aidan comes. "When will your friend come here?" I asked to Alva. She was looking at the sky, lost in thoughts. I stood up and touched her arm timidly. Alva startled and then turned her face towards me. "I am sorry. I was thinking... Just thinking about future." she said and patted my shoulder. Spending a survival week with her and sharing the nights together in a same room and in the same car made us feel closer to each other. But envy was still irritating me, damn."I don't know when but he should have been here early in the morning that good for nothing moron. He send a horde of guards to our door but still he is no where to be found." Alva frowned. "Are they werewolves? The guards out there?" I asked. She folded her arms, c****d an eyebrow. "I don't think so. They are working for Sullivan, well, actually for Aidan so, they all are lycans, probably." she shrugged. "Lycans?" I was shocked and my eyes widened. "Aren't all the lycans loyal to their king?" I asked. Alva chuckled and shook her head to sides. "Muiri, love, Aidan is the only rightful heir to the throne. This throne and his status has been bestowed upon him by born. Bloodlines are very important for all Lycanthrope." Alva shrugged again. I was so confused and every other day I was learnng something new. "But, didn't the king exile Aidan? Or disown him?" I asked. Alva waved her hand with a lazy gesture. "It doesn't matter. That good for nothing king can't change the fact that Aidan's gift. Moon itself favored Aidan. Everyone of them knows. And that fucker has a name. It is Oleg." she spat after saying the king's name. 

"What about their surname?" I asked and smiled awkwardly. Alva's jaw dropped to the ground. "You are kidding, right? You don't know your mate's surname? And not just that, you... Are you sure that your parents who raised you were werewolves?" Alva asked wryly and folded her arms. I shrugged and smiled awkwardly. Letting out a long sigh, Alva shook her head. "Ivanov." she said. "Huh?" I tilted my head to left a bit, trying to understand her. "Ah! Muiri! Aidan's surname is Ivanov!" she yelled and facepalmed. "Oh. It is weird his surname is sounding like Russian." I scratched my head and grinned stupidly. Alva is a hot headed person but she is actually as soft as a cotton candy. I don't want to feel envy towards her because she can be the first friend I've ever had in my life. All she has done was just being sincere towards me and reassuring me when I was feeling insecure and scared. "It is not something wrong that you said. He is actually half Russian." Alva shrugged and I blinked for a few times. "What a complicated bastard he is." I said lazily but then I covered my mouth because I thought it could offend Alva. But to my surprise, she bursted into a laughter for minutes and tears started to flow down from her eyes but not because she was crying. "Bahahaha! You are really something!" Alva said and wipe away her tears and running nose. "He is complicated indeed. But enough of that let's go downstairs and swim." she bounced with excitement. Seeing me hesitating, Alva came closer to me and crouched before me as I sat on the chair. "Don't worry. No one can harm you as long as you are with me. I promised to Aidan for protecting you and not only that, there is a horde of lycans are protecting you too. So, stop sulking and let's change." Alva said and smiled.

After me changing into a swimsuit, Alva barge into bathroom and looked at me puzzled. The bikini she wore was showing her perfect curves and her blond long hair was shining under the lamp. It wasn't envy that I was feeling, it was pure insecurity. Damn, why would they all have to be that beautiful? It is irritating the hell out of me. "Why a frickin swimsuit?" she looked at me, judging. Normally, I would be offended but I knew she wasn't trying to make fun of me. "I feel more comfortable in one." I shrugged awkwardly and smiled. She shook her head and came closer. "You have a beautiful body, you idiotic girl. Stop acting like a insecure child." she berated me. Easy for her to say, she looks like Aphrodite. And I am feeling like Quasimodo. If only I would be as good and kind as him though. "No, Alva. I am okay and comfortable in this. Let's go." I said and started to drag her out of the room to the pool. 

Once we reached the pool, without a second thought I bolted and jump into sparkling water. How refreshing the sensation of floating in water. We spent at least three hours in water and then I started to feel a bit tired therefor we headed back to room. 

I fell into deep slumber once we returned to our room. I hadn't been sleeping or eating well just as Alva, because of all the anxiety and survival parkour we had together. Not just that after seeing those horrifying scenes back at Aklavik, all the vomiting pushed me to the point of exhaustion. I smelled something familiar and nice while my eyes being closed. Same woodsy, musky scent which I savoured whenever I am with Aidan. Even though this scent started filling through the room I am in, I had fallen so deeply asleep that I didn't move, couldn't move my body even an inch. But then, I felt something warm and big was pulling off the quilt on me. I had to wake up but still I was unable to move a finger. Someone lifted my body and started to squeeze me. While this person was toying with my body, I could only savour that familiar scent that I am inhaling deeply again. "Open your beautiful eyes, my dearest." this huskily voice... "You have to look at me so that I will be ensuring myself that you are okay." yes, now I am sure. This man who scooping me in his arms and inhaling me as if he was inhaling a daffodil was none other than Aidan indeed. But why am I still unable to look at this magnificent creature before me? "What happened to my mate?!" I heard Aidan barked. "I don't f*****g know! She was okay before we went to swimming!" Alva said and I could hear how scared she was, her voice trembling. "She is burning up! Call a proper doctor! This instant!" Aidan barked again and placed me on the bed. Not too long after that my body felt heavier and I could feel no more.

As I opened my eyes again, I saw Aidan's beautiful face, close to mine. I couldn't help but reached out my hand to to touching his tousled, soft hair. And when my hand cupped his cheek once, he flinched and oppened his eyes "A-aidan?" I said timidly because I thought that magnificent creature before me had a chance to be an illusion. "Ahh... That is right, my dearest. Your mate is here and you are safe." he said huskily, held my hand and sniffed my palm, kissing. "Last night... Why couldn't you wake up? What happened to you?" he asked and buried his face to the crook of my neck. "I don't know." I replied and with an instinct, I tangled my fingers with his hair, stroked it. With this gesture of mine, he even buried further his face. "If you continue to press your nose against my neck like that you will choke yourself to death." I said sarcastically and destroyed this romantic mood we were having. But he didn't respond negatively and just chuckled sweetly. "You sure are a mood killer, damn it." he said and pulled his face away slowly. When he held me this cautious between his chest and his arms, it felt like I had become the owner of this enormous beast's heart. He was so submissive when I touch him suddenly, though he was certainly the one who is in charge. He is confusing me. From the first day I met him till now. But for a moment, all I wanted to do was forgetting everything about past and future and cling to him, hold onto him as if... As if I am a part of him what he cannot separate for eternity. It is not fair, Aidan. You were the one who separated me from my family, from my own life and now all I wanted to not to be separated from you ever again. I felt so lonely and weak when you were away. Did you feel the same?  

How I wanted to tell him. But I cannot. Because deep inside I knew that we will be severed as we should be. For I am not meant for his world. But... What is that painful sensation in my chest? Why am I feeling so bounded and chained? Why am I feeling like a moth flying into the flames which will be its death bed? "I am relieved." I whispered and he heard. "What for?" he asked, whispering too. "For seeing you one piece, safe an sound." I answered, again, whispering. No doubt, I've  completely lost my mind. I wasn't toying with him and I wasn't lying too. And for that, I cursed myself. I was intended to leave him once I had my revenge and all I was doing, all I was saying that the words he wanted me to pour out between my lips. After pulling away from each other to see each other's faces, I saw his beautiful hazel eyes. Those eyes filled with longing were warming my soul. Then it hit me. "I think...I..." I've completely lose myslef, s**t, "I missed you, Aidan." damn, I said it. He seemed  as if he was in a trance. But after few seconds, he widened his eyes, raised his brows and pursed his lips into a straight line. s**t, I have to back off but after the look he gave me, I knew. From that moment it became impossible. I could feel Aidan's warmth through my wrist, but at the same time, I remembered that it was the same wrist he held to drag me into this hell of a mess too. Am I the only one who was feeling like this? Like, a pile of s**t of emotions? Am I the only one to suffer while he touches me like this? Out of a disappointment and frustration, I felt like I came to my senses and jolted out of the bed. The confusion on his face was evident. "Leave me alone for a moment. I need to be alone." I ordered him and Aidan growled loudly. "Did you go insane? Why are you acting like this right now? Didn't you said..." I cut him "Yes, I know what I just said. But now, I want to be alone. Leave!" I snapped at him. He stood up and in a blink of an eye he appeared then halted in front of me. As our eyes met, I saw that insane look on his face. As if he was ready to kill me. "I've left you all alone for an enough time I think. But that's it. You are being disobedient again and it looks like you forgot what I am. Who the f*****g I am!" he roared. I didn't flinch before his loud tone for I was expecting him to do so. I took my anger, my frustration and my sorrow out on Aidan. Even though he didn't actually the one who was at the blame. But in that moment, I wanted to blame him. My body started to shiver because I was at the verge of bursting into tears. f*****g, pathetic loser. I couldn't even control my emotions. While Aidan looking at me like this cold, I am feeling lonely. And I really don't know how to respond so, I did what I was good at. I ran. I tried to dash out of the room but after taking two steps, Aidan snarled loudly and held my arm tightly. "What the f**k is wrong with you?" he asked, cupped my face with his warm hands, his glare was enough to freeze my soul though. I don't know, Aidan. I really don't know.

I need him to avenge my parents so I had to endure him. But at the same time I wanted to run away from him to save my life and gain back my freedom, my life, shaping through my own free will. And also, that hell of a new feeling popped up which was confusing my life and turning it into a living hell. The feeling of... Love? Affection?

I tried to get out of the room again but he held my elbow, yanked me closer then pinned me against the wall. While he was leaning to kiss me, I shoved him away, that huge bastard didn't stagger even an inch. He leaned to my ear, I couldn't saw his face though. "Is being with me disgusts you that bad? Am I that horrendous?" he murmured and groaned, his hand were shaking. You are not the one who is horrendous. It is me, you oaf.

Aidan pulled away, gripped my chin and made me look right into his eyes. "Two days, Muiri. You will be all mine, both your body and your soul. After two f*****g days." his voice was low, growling, a warning to me as I rolled my eyes. 

Aidan, Alva and I ate dinner in a private dining room at hotel. Everything here was screaming luxury and gleaming. It was irritating actually. I've always hated snobby places. It's mere atmosphere making me nervous. Because of my anxiety I couldn't eat properly. Aidan groaned and pull me closer to him from my seat. "It was only a few days and you lose weight. I don't like skinny girls so you will eat properly and gain weight." he said and tried to feed me. Normally, I am a glutton. It is not my fault that I can't gain weight. "Stop it. I can eat by myself." I shoved his hand and he looked at me lazily. "I don't care how or when but you will finish this." he shrugged. Our eyes met with Alva and she was watching us like watching a comedy show. Then someone knocked the door politely. "Aidan. They are here." Sullivan said and I saw Aidan smirked. "Who are they?" I asked and looked both Aidan and Alva. Alva anxiously shrugged and smiled, on the other hand Aidan looked at me annoyed and disdainfully. "The only issue that you should be concerning about is eating your meal." he folded his arms and shrugged then went out. How could be a person that annoying?!

After he went out to meet whoever they were, Alva yawned and stood up. "Okay, Muiri. I have some issues to attend to, I'm going too. So do whatever you want but please, do not provoke him. Don't worry, though. Once he mark you, things will be more relaxed for you." she said happily. I tilted my head a bit "Huh? Why?" and asked. Giggling, Alva shook her head. "What do you think, silly? Once he mark you, you two will become one. That means he will let you wander around idly or freely." she said and giggled again. "I really don't understand Alva. Marking me won't change anything. And even so...how?" I asked again. After letting out a long sigh she looked at me lazily. "You really don't know anything, right? Marking you make you two soul-bound. Wherever you go, he can find you, feel you and once the yet unborn deity inside you grow, you will become a lycan." she said exhaustedly. Oh, s**t. That changes everything! Because it mean I have only two hell of days to butt away from him and his world. 

Once again, I was torn between my thoughts. Revenge or freedom? Being live as a captive beside a monster or being satisfied by the taste of revenge? But...Do I really want or care about having revenge? What have I become? This is not me. Alone in the room with my thoughts made me think clearer. For days, for weeks, I wasn't being myself now I am aware. I have to get out of here. If I stay here for a minute longer, I will never gain back my freedom. Mom and dad in heavens, forgive me for I need to be selfish. And please, try to understand me, both of you, that I wasn't the one who choose this life. I am sorry. But I have to walk away to save my life. Can't stay for avenging you with that beast. 

I've made up my mind. Now, all I have to do is a good plan and being swifth. Walking nervously in room, back and forth, I nibbled my nails while thinking. I thought about simply running away but it is not possible for there were two giant lycan standing before my door. But I'm not good at planning so, I will give it a try. Opening the door few inches, the lycan stood at left saw me immediately. "Is there something wrong, Miss?" he asked. What the..? I've always heard that lycan's are just arrogant bastards who always look down humans and werewolves. This one looks so polite. "I-I... I want to get out and have some...some...fresh air?" I smiled awkwardly and hell I knew, I was looking like a complete i***t. "As you wish, Miss. But I need to inform my Sigma." there it is again this "Sigma" s**t. I recoiled and waved my hands, smiling timidly. "No, no. I don't want to bother him. He is very busy right now. And it just take five minutes so don't bother yourselves with me." I said and stratch my head. Damn, I am a total weirdo. "I am sorry, Miss, but I need to inform." the lycan said with a stoic face. "Ugh! Just get out of my way. Go and inform whoever you want to. I'm bored to death while he is wander around idly. Leave me alone." I threw a tantrum and wind past him, hastily. I hoped my little revolt would confuse and stop them.

It is not an attempt to run away now. First, I need to investigate hotel door, bathrooms, windows and steal, no, borrow some money from drawer in room. I knew I had a little time before Aidan comes and interrogate me so quickly I needed to research for taxi numbers and how to call or hire them. Once I reached the ground floor where the main door is located, searching and studying every feature about everything almost. When I saw the reception desk I looked for business cards, numbers, anything I could use actually. Then I found a paper has a list on it. That's it! Now, all I have to return to my room without drawing any attention. "Miss, can I help you? Are you looking for something specific?" one of the recepcionist asked me while I trying to go back. I halfly turned my face towards her and smiled. "No, thank you. I can handle it." I said and then just as I turned to my direction, I bumped into something hard. Oh, how stupid am I? I realized that something was actually someone. An innocent waitress who was holding a tray full of beverage. I fell onto my butt and she fell onto hers too. Both of us got covered with whiskey, wine and beer. I jolted up and ran towards her. "I am sorry, so sorry. Here, take my hand. Let me help you." I reached out my hand to her. I was feeling the utmost remorse for being so reckless and bumped into her. Because of me she could feel humiliated and I cannot let that happen. She held my hand stood up, our eyes met and after a second she flinched and bowed. "Please forgive me, Miss." she apologized from me. "What are you talking about? I am at the blame. Come let me help you to clean yourself." I said hastily and once more I grabbed her hand to help her. I didn't recognize a pair of hazel eyes were on me at that moment.