Before the Breaking
1111 Words
Selene Rayne
Past Timeline — 3 Years Before the Rejection
⸻
If you ask anyone in Nightfall Pack what a Luna should be, they’ll list a few things:
Strong but silent.
Beautiful but obedient.
Loyal — but never outshine the Alpha.
I learned all of that before I was even marked.
My parents were warriors — middle-rank wolves, proud and hardworking. We weren’t noble, but we weren’t low-born either. We lived by the rules, trained hard, and believed in the Moon Goddess. I was raised to respect the bond, to serve my pack with pride, and to never question an Alpha’s word.
So when I turned eighteen and the mate bond snapped into place — to Kade Thorn, no less — it felt like a blessing.
A miracle.
Even if he didn’t smile at me the first time he looked into my eyes.
Even if he just nodded and said, “Of course,” like fate had simply handed him another tool to command.
I convinced myself it was nerves.
That he would soften with time.
That he would love me eventually.
I was wrong.
The first year, he kept me hidden.
“Until you’re properly trained,” he said. “You weren’t raised for leadership.”
So I trained. Harder than anyone. Woke at dawn, ran until my legs bled, studied protocol and law and diplomacy. I learned how to dress like a Luna, speak like one, kneel when needed and stand when permitted.
And all the while, I tried to love him.
But he never looked at me the way mates were supposed to look at each other.
He saw duty. Not desire.
A means to an end.
And I accepted it. Because that’s what Lunas do.
The second year, he let me move into the Alpha wing.
But we didn’t share a bed.
We shared a schedule.
I sat beside him at council meetings, but he rarely asked for my opinion. If I spoke too long, he’d cut me off with a look. If I smiled too brightly, he’d remind me we weren’t entertainers. If I wore something too soft, he’d tell me to dress like a Luna, not a maiden.
Once, I asked him if he regretted the mate bond.
He replied without hesitation:
“Regret is a waste of time. You’re here. Do your job.”
So I did.
I learned to smile for the pack, to nod for the elders, to suppress my wolf when she snarled at how he dismissed us.
Her name was Eira — fierce, silver-furred, proud.
She hated being caged.
But she stayed, for me. For us.
Because we still believed the bond meant something.
The third year was the worst.
That was when Liliana came.
A visiting delegate, at first. From the Crescent Claw Pack. High-born. Charismatic. Arrogant in that way noble wolves are taught from birth.
She was everything Kade admired: unapologetic power, bloodline prestige, and a ruthless tongue.
I saw it happen in pieces — the way his eyes followed her, the way he asked for her opinion in council meetings when mine was silenced.
I tried to deny it.
Until I walked into his office one day and found them standing too close.
Not touching.
Not yet.
But the intent was thick in the air.
Liliana looked at me with thinly veiled amusement.
“Oh,” she said, “I didn’t know this office came with an accessory.”
Kade didn’t correct her.
Didn’t defend me.
Didn’t even look guilty.
That night, Eira howled so loud inside me I thought I would break apart.
But I still stayed.
Because that’s what Lunas do.
By the time the Blood Moon approached, I knew something was wrong.
He was distant. Cold. Harsher than usual.
He stopped inviting me to pack dinners. Denied my requests to host the Luna blessing ceremony. Dismissed me publicly when I tried to offer advice on border patrol.
I asked him directly, one night — just days before the ceremony.
“Kade,” I said, standing tall even as my heart trembled. “What is going on?”
He looked at me, and for once, there was no mask.
Only irritation.
“You were never meant to be Luna,” he said. “You were convenient. A mate chosen by fate, but not by me.”
I reeled. “But the bond—”
“—was a mistake.”
A mistake.
“I’ve tolerated you out of respect for the Goddess,” he added. “But Liliana… she understands what power means. What leadership requires. You’re too soft.”
And then he left.
No apology. No guilt.
And I still showed up to the ceremony like a fool. In silk. In hope. In love.
Only to be shattered.
⸻
I didn’t tell anyone all of this.
Not even when I was found bleeding in the woods.
Not when Ronan Vale carried me into a strange room and wrapped me in warmth I didn’t understand.
But as I sat in his infirmary, staring at the firelight on the stone wall, it all came back.
The breaking.
The betrayal.
The belief that I wasn’t enough.
Maybe I wasn’t.
Maybe I still wasn’t.
But I had survived.
And that had to mean something.
A soft knock broke the silence.
This time, it wasn’t Ronan.
A young woman entered — maybe twenty, with kind eyes and curly auburn hair pulled into a ponytail. She wore a healer’s uniform and held a tray of soup and tea.
“Hi,” she said gently. “I’m Mara. One of the pack healers.”
I nodded.
“I was told you might not be hungry, but I thought I’d try anyway.”
She set the tray down and hesitated. “You don’t have to talk. I just… wanted you to know that whatever happened to you, it wasn’t your fault.”
I blinked.
She smiled a little. “We’ve had a few she-wolves come through here over the years. You’re not the first Luna to be hurt by her Alpha. But you might be the first one strong enough to walk away from it.”
I didn’t correct her.
I hadn’t walked.
I had collapsed.
But maybe surviving was enough for now.
She turned to go, but paused in the doorway.
“Oh, and Selene?”
“Yes?”
“Alpha Ronan,” she said carefully, “he’s… complicated. But he’s not cruel. If he brought you here, it’s because he saw something worth saving.”
And then she left me alone with the tea, the firelight…
And the slow, terrifying truth:
I didn’t want to die anymore.
- Writer
