All the Devils are Here

Old Friend

Fallon

In my dream, I am transported back to last year. I'm back home and my mother is comforting me as we both weep silently.

"You did what you had to do", she whispers softly into my hair. She says those words in an attempt to console me but, her words mean nothing. In my mother's eyes, I was always right. And that should have made me feel supported but, instead, it made me question her opinions concerning people she was afraid of. And my mother was afraid of me.

In a flash, the handle of my door is pulled down and I'm thrown out of my dream world. Fight or flight, I always pick fight so I aim my gun at the door, ready to shoot as the creep swings my door open. We react at the same time

"Whoa, It's me!", he says as he takes cover;

"What the f**k, Rainer. I could have shot you!" - our words overlap each other as I lower my aim and stand up.

"How did you even get in here?", I know the receptionist is s**t at her job but, I don't want to believe she just let him waltz in.

"I'm your next-door neighbour", he says with a smirk as he dangles his keys that have '013' written on them. 

"You were following me", I state the obvious and he doesn't deny it. If he knows where I am then I'm betting my family knows too. I reach for my backpack to begin packing but, he interjects my thoughts;

"They don't know that I'm here, Fallon. And they don't know that you're here either". Not that I trust him but, I stop packing. 

"Why are you here then? If they didn't send you",

"Official purposes", he leisurely takes a step and sits on the tiny chair by the edge of the wall. 

"If anyone told me you'd be the first to leave, I would have laughed in their face." "What are you doing, Fallon? What are you doing coming here? You of all people should know better." 

"What official purposes brought you here?", I ignore his questions and ask him some of my own. I know Sentinels always have reasons to move around and beyond the city because they were the eyes and ears but, Rainer is one of my Father's most trusted Sentinels and he seldom leaves uptown.

"To this rundown motel? none. I'm only here for you." As much as I would like to claim not to know what my Father or anyone for that matter sees in him, I remember that not very long ago, I had fallen prey to his charm too.

My earliest memories are corrupted with Rainer's presence. He and I were polar opposites in that while he was jovial and light-hearted, I was rigid and often referred to as cold but, despite our differences, our aspirations had been the same. We wanted to lead. Out of the 6 groups in the council that governed the city, the Hunters and the Sentinels worked the closest together. While my family, the Evanders have ruled the Hunters for multiple generations, Rainer came from a line of Sentinels that were very far from the top. Yet, today he has made his mark as a lone Sentinel and even though he would never have a chance to rule his faction, he was already well respected among leaders including my Father who trusts his intel more than any other of his pairs

"I know things haven't been the same since Luc-", he's speaking and I cut him off sharply;

"Don't say his name". He inhales deeply and adjusts his position on the chair. His striking blue eyes are back on me as he speaks;

"It wasn't your fault.". I walk to the door and open it; 

"You can leave now. Thanks for dropping by". This causes him to chuckle in what I assume is disbelief. He gets on his feet and stops only about two feet away from me. I'm eyeing him suspiciously the whole time.

"You know Fallon just because we don't share the same bed anymore doesn't mean you cant talk to me. We used to be friends first."

We used to be friends. All three of us. Rainer and I couldn't keep our hands off each other when we were alone and in the company of others, we'd pretend to be just friends. Sometimes we'd pretend to be friends that could barely stand each other. It was exciting. It ended abruptly almost a year ago but, I still remember how good he could make me feel. I know he remembers too.

"Don't tell them where I am.", I capitalize on this moment of joint reminiscing that we have and even though I don't say please, I know he knows that this is me pleading. Ordinarily, Rainer would tell my father anything he needed to know. He was loyal to him. Asking him to conceal my location might be something out of his power.

"I won't. I promise", the two feet distance seems to shrink and he feels only inches away as he speaks again;

"Just don't run away from me", he holds my gaze for half a minute before I break it and speak;

"Not that I can. You have eyes everywhere, I'm sure finding me wouldn't be a problem.", I place my hand on the door again indicating that it's time for him to go. He chuckles lightly and shakes his head in amusement. He finally walks out of my room and right before I shut the door, he asks;

"How long do you think you can keep this up? How long before your little vacation ends and you go back home". And here I was thinking we were bonding again but, in only a matter of seconds he manages to remind me of one of the reasons I absolutely considered shooting him sometimes. He never understood me. And he still doesn't'. He can't understand why I would possibly want to leave my old life forever because to him, my old life was perfect. I think the frown on my face gives away my anger at his question and he tries to back up;

"I didn't mean it like that, I -"

"Goodbye, Rainer", I say and shut the door in his face. This time I lock it. Not that locks ever stopped anyone. He was right about one thing though, 'how long can I keep this up?'

I'm unable to sleep for the rest of the day and even dead into the night, I remain awake staring at my ceiling and entertaining myself with the random shouts and conversations of the rest of the world that managed to sneak their ways into these very thin walls. Tomorrow, I would look for a real apartment and move out of this s**t hole.