Cousins Confessions

Chapter 6

The evening after I walked away from Nate, I couldn’t stop pacing around my apartment. The silence was deafening, the emptiness of my space mirroring the hollowness in my chest. My thoughts were an endless loop of what-ifs, questions that had no answers.

I needed someone to talk to, someone who would give me clarity—or at least help me process the chaos swirling in my head. There was only one person who could do that.

I picked up my phone and called Mary. She answered almost immediately.

“Becca?” Her voice was filled with concern. “What’s wrong?”

“Can you come over?” I asked, my voice trembling.

“I’ll be there in twenty,” she said without hesitation.

When Mary arrived, she had a bag of my favorite snacks and that no-nonsense expression that told me she wasn’t going to let me wallow. She set everything on the counter, then plopped down on my couch, patting the seat next to her.

“Spill,” she ordered.

I sighed, sitting down and curling my legs under me. “I told Nate that I couldn’t do this anymore. That he needed to figure out his marriage before dragging me into it.”

Mary raised an eyebrow. “Good for you. That’s exactly what he needed to hear.”

“But…” I hesitated, the weight of my emotions pressing down on me.

“But you still love him,” she finished for me.

I nodded, tears pooling in my eyes. “I do. And it hurts, Mary. It hurts so much.”

Mary took a deep breath, leaning back against the couch. “You know, love isn’t always this fairytale people make it out to be. It’s messy and complicated, and sometimes it hurts more than it heals.”

“Thanks for the pep talk,” I muttered, wiping at my eyes.

She gave me a sympathetic smile. “I’m not saying this to make you feel worse. I’m saying it because you need to stop romanticizing this whole thing. Nate’s feelings might be real, but so is the situation he’s in. You can’t ignore that.”

“I’m not ignoring it,” I argued. “I walked away, didn’t I?”

“For now,” she said pointedly. “But can you keep walking away? Or are you going to let him pull you back in the moment he says the right thing?”

Her words hit me like a slap. “I don’t know,” I admitted.

Mary softened, her tone gentler. “Becca, you have to figure out what you really want. Not what your heart wants in the heat of the moment, but what you want for your future. Do you want to be someone’s second choice? Do you want to be part of the reason a marriage falls apart?”

“No,” I said, shaking my head. “Of course not.”

“Then you need to make a decision and stick to it,” she said firmly. “Because this back-and-forth is only going to hurt you more in the end.”

Her words were harsh, but they were exactly what I needed to hear.

Later that night, as I lay in bed staring at the ceiling, my phone buzzed. My heart sank when I saw Nate’s name on the screen.

Don’t answer, I told myself. Don’t let him pull you back in.

But I couldn’t ignore it.

“Hello?” I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

“Rebecca,” he said, his voice thick with emotion. “I just… I needed to hear your voice.”

“Nate, we can’t keep doing this,” I said, my heart aching at the sound of his pain.

“I know,” he said. “But it’s so hard to let go.”

“You have to try,” I whispered. “For both our sakes.”

There was a long pause before he finally said, “Goodnight, Rebecca.”

“Goodnight, Nate.”

As I hung up, I felt a fresh wave of tears. Letting go wasn’t supposed to feel this impossible.

The next morning, Mary showed up at my apartment unannounced, armed with coffee and a determined look.

“Get dressed,” she said, thrusting a cup into my hands.

“What? Why?” I asked, blinking at her in confusion.

“Because you need a distraction,” she said. “We’re going out.”

I groaned but obeyed, knowing she wouldn’t take no for an answer.

As we walked through the bustling streets of the city, Mary kept the conversation light, steering me away from thoughts of Nate. But eventually, she brought us back to the topic.

“Becca,” she said as we sat on a bench overlooking the river. “You’re stronger than you think. You’ve been through worse than this, and you’ve come out the other side. You’ll get through this too.”

Her words gave me a glimmer of hope. Maybe she was right. Maybe I was stronger than I realized.

That night, I made a decision. I blocked Nate’s number, knowing it was the only way to truly move on.

It hurt like hell, but I knew it was the right thing to do.

As I stared at the blocked contact on my screen, I whispered to myself, “You deserve better, Rebecca. And you’re going to find it.”

The next few weeks were hard, but with Mary’s support, I began to find my footing again. I focused on work, spent time with friends, and slowly started to heal.

And while the pain of letting Nate go lingered, I knew it was the first step toward finding the happiness I truly deserved.