I Have Questions

Blind date...?

Anton

I can sense that the person next to me is either nervous or uncomfortable with the thought that I’m sitting too close for her comfort. I’m sorry, ma’am. I don’t mean to invade your personal space, it’s just that this seat is too small for both of us.

Simon then gave us instructions. “Okay, for the blind date, just think of it as having a conversation with a new friend. You may ask random questions, but you may not know his or her name until we ask you to take your blindfolds off. Is that clear? Okay, you may start now.”

I cleared my throat and then asked, “So, the first question, who goes first?” I can hear her laughing. But…wait.

“Okay, then. In the periodic table of elements, what’s the atomic number of arsenic?” I think I know who I’m talking to. Still, I’m stunned by her question. Dumbfounded, I just can’t help but laugh.

“Woah, wow. I didn’t sign up for the science quiz bee, I thought this was a blind date!” I can hear her laughing too, then she mumbled “That was cute.”

“But, let me finish, it’s 33.” It was a proud moment for me. Who would have thought that after all these years I would still remember that!

“Oh that’s cool, you know that too!” Collective giggling ensued. “It’s not rocket science, it’s…” and before I could finish my sentence, we interjected in unison. “Chemistry!” I guess coming to this interview by accident wasn’t so bad after all.

It was such a fun and light conversation and I know she’s enjoying it as well. “My turn! And, please, let’s keep the questions blind date friendly, shall we?” She was chuckling! And hitting my arm!

“Okay, hm. What’s your favorite food?” “Anything that you need to use chopsticks for. Asian food, but my all-time favorite is shrimp tempura.”

“Oh I can’t have those, I’m allergic to crustaceans. It’s a one-sided love. I love shrimps, they hate me!”

Hello! Ding, ding! Doesn’t that ring a bell, dear?

There was a short pause then she said, “Oh, so it’s like some kind of a toxic relationship, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, I keep eating them and then taking antihistamines until the antihistamines don’t work anymore. Wanna know why?”

“Why?” Her voice was shaking.

“Because the person I love, she loves those crunchy shrimps. And I love seeing her happy. She makes those little shoulder dances while devouring her shrimps, and it makes me happy that she’s happy.”

There was silence. I took the opportunity to ask. “My turn. Have you been happy these past five years…” I took off my blindfold, even without Simon’s instruction, and held her hand. “Abigail?”

Gail

There are a hundred (a thousand, even) ways to greet an ex-lover. Hi! Hey! How have you been? What’s up? You insensitive jerk, why did you come back into my life?! There are a hundred ways. A thousand, even. But the only thing I could manage to say was, “I’m not Abigail.”

I could feel him holding my cold hand, then he let go of it. I can feel that he stood up and reached out to untie the knot of my blindfold. Then he looked at me with a smile, as if saying “Oh really, you’re not Abigail?”

I just sat there frozen; my throat is slowly getting dryer and it shows, it SHOWS, that I am completely caught off guard. Somebody save me, please.

He’s grinning now as he sat beside me again, his hands clasped and resting on his thighs now. Damn, he aged well! I’m older than him by 2 years, so it’s a given that he would always looks more youthful. He wore a black pullover hoodie and dark denim pants, and he looked effortlessly stylish.

His lips are constantly pinkish red, the only time they lacked color was the night he left me. He cried the whole morning and forgot to drink water that day, thus leaving his lips cracked and pale. Wait, what? Why do I still remember this in full detail? I’m not sure how long was I staring at him, but what got me back to my senses was the director’s voice.

“Okay! Um, this is unexpected. I hope you enjoyed the experience. We were about to ask you guys some questions but we think it’s unnecessary because you’re already…”

“Exes!” I answered.

“Friends!” Anton interjected at the same time. Wow, that was painfully awkward!

The director cleared his throat. “Well, exes CAN be friends. Thank you so much for participating, it’s been a pleasure to work with you.” He shook my hand first, then Anton’s.

I walked towards Dane, who as of the moment was trying to look busy, hoping I won’t cut her body in half. “Daniella. Do you know about this? Did you plan this?” I used my most intimidating voice so I could get the answer right away.

She looked back at me as if I was accusing her of a heinous crime. “No! I’m equally shocked as you! Simon told me he was his brother’s substitute. Anyway…” She unzipped her purse and fished out a small red envelope. “Here’s the token of appreciation from our group. From our hearts to yours!” She made a finger heart pose after handing out the envelope. Cringe-worthy! I scoffed, “What's this, an Ang Pao*?” I opened it and found out it was a gift cheque for a coffee shop. Sweet!

Dane was still not done for the day, so I went to the elevator alone. Funny how I haven’t seen Anton again since the shoot. As the crowd squeezed to get inside the elevator, I was pushed to the corner.

“What a day”, I thought. All those talking and socializing exhausted me, and add to the fact that I just saw again my ex-lover after 5 years, I believe I won’t get the mental rest I wanted. If I have to be honest with myself, yes, I am happy to see him. I kept replaying his smile inside my head. As I was so immersed in my thoughts that I didn’t notice that the only people left inside that elevator were me…and Anton. Anton? What was he doing here? He used to shiver at the thought of elevators.

As I glanced at him, I can see his eyes are tightly shut, and he was breathing heavily. His whole body was stiff, his arms crossed. He may be a tall, muscular 26-year-old man, but that moment took me back to when he was a scared 18-year-old college boy clinging to me every time we had to ride an elevator. I stood near him as I stroked his back with the palm of my hand. “Shhhh… you’ll be fine.” He opened his eyes slowly. “Gail?” I gave him a reassuring smile. “Hi. Don’t worry, we’re near the ground floor.” He bowed his head, smiled shyly, and put his right hand on his nape. “Sorry, I’m still trying to overcome my fear of elevators.”

Feeling confused, I tilted my head to the right. “Why did you use the elevator anyway? We used to argue before I could convince you to ride this before.” He looked straight into my eyes. “Because I…” He was barely starting his sentence when the elevator stopped at the ground floor and the doors opened. He took a sigh of relief. I said, “Well, here we are.” I smiled at him as I got out of the elevator. “It was nice to see you again.” I waved goodbye and walked away without looking back. I forced myself not to look back.

That night, I got a message on my social media account. It was from Anton.

Anton: I hope you got home safe. Sorry, I got tongue-tied, I didn’t even get to say goodbye. Hoping to see you again someday. I had a great time talking to you today.

Gail: Likewise.

Anton: Will I see you again?

I bit my lip and thought about what to reply. Does it sound desperate if I do want to see him again? Does it seem heartless if I told him not to count on it?

Gail: Maybe. Maybe someday. No promises.