Falling For You

Chapter 17:The First Punishment

I was hoping to avoid my sibling at the front desk, but I had no luck there. One of my siblings sat staring me down as soon as I walked through the portal. His bored look became a glare as I began to walk closer. He stood up and blocked my path.

“You’re not allowed through without a soul,” he growled, “You caused me great trouble last time,” pointing to slashes all over his arms, and then he lifted his robes to show matching marks on his legs as well.

I had to think quickly, hopefully my brother was naive enough to be tricked, “I have word from Father. He wants me to deliver a message to someone here.”

My sibling frowned in thought, “Who do you need to speak with and why?”

“It’s a private matter, it doesn’t involve anyone else. I hope you can respect that,” I lied, it wasn’t completely untrue. I did need to speak with Lilith as it involved understanding her role, to hopefully also gain insight into mine.

“Very well, I will call for someone to guide you,” he said in a defeated and annoyed voice.

I nodded politely and waited for my guide. She appeared out of nowhere and motioned for me to follow her down the main hall. “Who do you seek?”

“Lilith,” I replied calmly.

She nodded once and turned back to the hall we started down. The gray hallways felt cool and dark just as before, but now there was a new feeling. It was ominous. As we trekked further in, a faint sound was slowly coming into my consciousness. It grew louder as we got closer to our destination. Just as we reached Lilith’s door, I realized I recognized the sound. It was crying, but not from a sibling or Lilith. It was from a baby, but not just one; there seemed to be hundreds if not thousands of wails from infants. My sister opened the door for me and turned to leave.

“Wait, where did all the babies come from? I only brought one,” I questioned authoritatively.

She simply grinned, gestured to the door she opened, and walked away. My brow furrowed in frustration. I guessed that Lilth might have the answer, but I wasn’t sure why a human in Hell would know, let alone understand why.

The scene before me felt melancholy but didn’t give off an air of torture. This made me feel a little relieved, but I was still extremely worried and unsure why. Lilith was sitting in a rocking chair staring at a crib before her in abject horror. When Lilith heard me come into the room she cried out in utter fear. Her cry pierced me to the soul.

“Please, don’t take this one! Please, I promise I’ve learned my lesson! I can’t do this anymore!” she sobbed out in pain and terror.

“Lilith,” I said softly, “It’s me, Azrael.”

Lilith seemed unfazed and in an entirely different plane of existence from me. I wasn’t sure if she would even recognize me now, but I had to try to break her out of this spell. I crossed the room slowly, which caused another shriek to escape her lips.

“Lilith, it’s Azrael. I’m not here to hurt you,” I said as I reached out to touch her reassuringly.

When my hand made contact with her cheek, a shudder rolled through her body and a gasp escaped involuntarily. A spark of recognition passed across her face and she jumped up to embrace me. Her grasp on me felt incredibly strong and I wondered how long it had felt like I had been gone to her.

“Are you really here?” she whispered, amazed.

“Yes, I’m really here. What is going on?” I asked, scared to know the answer.

“I was so certain that you would never come back!” she cried out with some relief, “It’s been eons since you left me here… The things they have made me do… The things they put me through… I- I can’t do it anymore. Please save me from this!”

“I don’t understand. What are you talking about Lilith? What is your punishment?” I asked, careful not to upset her too much.

She grimaced at the word punishment, “Don’t you know? My punishment,” she spat at the word, “is a direct result of my sins on Earth. Lucifer himself read out my sins and decided my afterlife here.” At this a sob came from Lilith that tore at my heart.

“I didn’t realize Lucifer was in charge of such a thing, but I had guessed someone would be responsible for knowing these things and creating a punishment,” I responded, mechanically, as I wasn’t really sure what to say.

Lilith nodded as though she weren’t really listening to me and continued, “He said he knew the best way to torture us would be to use our own guilt and fear against humans… He told me that since I was cruel in taking away my baby from Adam… they would be cruel by making me have millions of halflings and take them all away from me never to be seen again. And to make things even worse, each time a demon comes to impregnate me, he looks like Adam. Adam always tells me the same thing. I’m unfit to be a partner and mother. He says that Eve is twice the woman compared to me.”

At this point, Lilith broke down into tears and wouldn’t say anything more. I rubbed her back and helped her back down into her rocking chair. I wished that they had been easier in their punishment of Eve as she was really not in the wrong. Sure, she had left Adam and deprived him of his child, but perhaps she just hadn’t been given the chance to return home. What would have happened if she hadn’t died after giving birth to their child?

“Lilith? Would you have gone back to Adam if you hadn’t died?” I tried to ask her, but it was no use.

Lilith would not answer me. I asked her multiple questions and yet she refused to meet my eye or discuss the matter further. Eventually, her sobs subsided and she returned to staring at the crib with a look of horror and terror on her face. Just as I was about to take a look in the crib, the door behind us opened. Adam strolled into the room casually.

“Still refusing to bond with our baby, I see,” Adam spat at Eve acidically. “You’re a terrible mother, you know that? This is all your fault. I hope you know that. This baby is better off without you. You could never be a good mother; in fact, Eve will be the perfect mother for him.”

The anger and hatred in Adam’s voice was too much for me. It froze me to my spot and made me feel as if he were directing all of these words at me. Adam took the baby from its crib and smiled wickedly at Lilith. Before I could break out of the trance he had created with his words, he exited the door. Lilith broke down from her chair. The sobs of mass hysteria were worse than any of her previous cries. I knew that it would be impossible to comfort her, let alone tell her that these things were all lies.

My best option at this point was to see where the demonic version of Adam had taken the baby. I slipped out of Lilith’s room, hoping I hadn’t taken too long to follow my sibling. I was faster in my exit than I had initially thought. My sibling, now back in his original form, slipped through another door not far from where I stood.

I looked in both directions, hoping no one was paying any mind to me. The halls were empty and desolate. It was easier than I thought to roam the halls of Hell. The cries of infants hit my senses again and urged me forward. I opened the door to the new room and the cries hit me like a wall of bricks.

The room seemed to stretch into eternity and was filled with rows of tiny cribs and crying demon babies. I felt a tear slip down my cheek as I finally understood what Lilith had meant by halflings. My siblings were taking Lilith against her will. They were making her repeatedly give birth to half human, half demon children and then they were ripping them away from her. But why? What was the point of this senseless and repeated creation? This was an abomination. This went against all of Father’s rules, didn’t it?

True, these beings were technically half angels and might be able to enter Heaven one day, but was this really the way to go about creating new angels? And even more importantly, how could Father stand by and allow such a thing? He had to know what was happening down here. He was the one who created this place to begin with. Why was this even being allowed? Father had said that humans and angels weren’t meant to procreate together as it would cause trouble. Didn’t he mean for this rule to apply to all realms, not just Earth?

I prayed silently that Father would do something. Surely Lucifer didn’t have complete and utter power in Hell. If that was the case, what did that mean for the other humans who were unfortunate enough to make his acquaintance? Was there really no line that Lucifer couldn’t cross? Was he really allowed to cause such chaos? That was when it finally hit me. Was he really being punished? Lucifer’s disobedience should have meant the end of his existence, instead he gained his own kingdom. A kingdom in which he could create abominations that were definitely going to outweigh all my siblings soon.

I ran from the room and this unfortunate truth as fast as I could. I was too absorbed in my thoughts to pay attention to my surroundings. All I knew was that I had to get as far from that room as quickly as possible. Just as I was about to make it back to the reception desk, I bumped into a dark shadowy figure. I looked up dazed to find none other than the one person I wanted to avoid on this trip to Hell.

“Seraphina,” I said, surprised.