In the Shadow of Love

The Past Returns

Three days had passed, and I had been diligently avoiding Logan's attempts to connect. Between work, training, and other obligations, I managed to convince my father that my avoidance was innocent. Today, I found myself wandering downtown near the dog park. Normally, I steered clear of these places, given the countless dog bite cases I had dealt with and the heartbroken clients who didn't understand how unpredictable untrained dogs could be. Still, I couldn't blame those who frequented the park; dogs needed a place to be dogs, and in the middle of the city, such spaces were rare.

Moving around to the benches, I sat down and texted Tonya. She was supposed to meet me here. Why she chose the dog park? I have no idea. Sometimes I think she likes to come here to pick up guys. No, I know she likes to come here and pick up guys. It’s her favorite hunting ground, and her uncanny ability to spot the handsome, single dog owners always amazes me. I glanced at my watch after about ten minutes and she still hadn’t arrived. Typical Tonya, always running late. The anticipation was turning into frustration as I sat there, feeling out of place among the cheerful dog owners. I got up to leave, starting to exit the park.

"Excuse me, ma'am. You dropped your wallet." A voice called out behind me, accompanied by a gentle tap on my shoulder. Turning around, I found myself staring into the face of a long-forgotten person. How I could forget those ocean blue eyes is beyond me. They were the same eyes that once looked at me with so much love and promise. His smile, warm and familiar, made my heart flutter. The surprise on his face mirrored my own as recognition dawned.

Nathan Parks. He was more than just an ex-boyfriend; he was ex-fiancé and my high school sweetheart, the boy who made my teenage years unforgettable. He had been the captain of the soccer team and also led the basketball team. Together, we competed for the school in swimming. Time had done little to diminish his good looks. If anything, it had made him even more handsome. He stood there in a flannel shirt, a well-worn t-shirt underneath, and jeans that hinted at his athletic build. Beside him, a big mutt of a dog, with its tongue hanging out and tail wagging, completed the picture of unexpected nostalgia.

"Abby?" he finally said after we stared at each other for a long moment. I gently took the wallet from his outstretched hand, my fingers brushing against his. He was still in shock from running into me.

"Hi Nathan," I replied softly, my voice barely above a whisper. In that instant, the pain of everything came crashing back in. How he had broken up with me during our sophomore year of college. We had been together for years. Everyone had thought that we were going to get married. We were even engaged, a secret I had kept, knowing how my father would react. But then, later that year, he broke it off randomly, and next thing I knew, he was gone to a college overseas. "Long time no see." My voice held a tinge of sarcasm as the heartbreak resurfaced. I quickly turned on my heels and moved away from him. I didn't want to hear what he had to say. He never gave me an explanation back then. I did not want one now.

"Abby, wait!" he called out, his voice filled with urgency. I could hear him coming after me, calling my name. Of course, his goofy dog was happily trailing after me as well, its leash dragging on the ground.

"Abby!" He grabbed my arm, turning me around to face him. I yanked my arm back, my eyes blazing with unresolved anger.

"No! No. You do not get to talk to me after how you left me," I yelled at him, tears forming in my eyes. "You don't get to do this. To come back after all this time!"

He stood there, stunned, trying to find the words, but I wasn't interested in hearing them. I turned around again and stormed away.

"Abby, please!" Nathan called after me, desperation seeping into his voice. "Just give me a minute. Let me explain."

I stopped in my tracks, my back still turned to him. "Explain? You think you can just explain away four years of silence? Of abandonment?" I spun around to face him, my voice rising. "We were engaged, Nathan. You left without a word, without an explanation. You broke up with me over text! Do you have any idea what that did to me?"

He looked pained, his eyes reflecting regret. "I know I hurt you. I was young and stupid, and I made a mistake. I thought I was doing the right thing by going away, by giving us both space."

"Space?" I scoffed, shaking my head. "You call disappearing to another country 'giving us space'? That's not space, Nathan. That's running away."

His dog nudged my leg, sensing the tension, but I couldn't bring myself to pet it. "Abby, I never stopped thinking about you," he said softly. "I wanted to come back, to explain, but I was afraid. Afraid of what you'd say, afraid of how much I'd hurt you."

"Well, congratulations, Nathan. You succeeded in hurting me more than anyone else ever could." My voice broke, and I wiped away the tears angrily. "But it doesn't matter now. I'm engaged. I'm moving on with my life."

Nathan's face fell, his eyes darkening with a mix of sorrow and frustration. "Engaged? To who?"

"It doesn't matter," I said, turning away again. "Just leave me alone, Nathan. We've said all there is to say."

He reached out, but stopped himself, letting his hand fall to his side. "Abby, please... I'm sorry."

I didn't look back as I walked away, my heart aching with the weight of unresolved feelings. I couldn't stay here, not with him here. Not when, even after all the pain and suffering he put me through, a part of me still wanted him to pull me into his arms and hold me, to kiss me and make up for the last four years he had been gone. But it didn't matter. I was engaged. I reminded myself of that. A McBride was always true to their word.

As I left the park, I forced myself to keep walking, even as my heart ached with the memories of what we once had. The love that had been so real, so intense, now felt like a distant dream, tainted by betrayal and time. I could feel his eyes on my back, but I didn't dare look back. I couldn't let him see the tears that were now streaming down my face. This was my reality now, and I had to live with it.

I hadn't walked far when I practically collided with Tonya, who was hurrying towards the park with her usual lively energy. She stopped abruptly, her eyes widening in shock and concern as she took in my tear-streaked face and trembling hands. Her usual bright demeanor shifted instantly to one of deep worry.

"Abby, what happened? Are you okay?" Tonya asked, her voice filled with confusion and worry.

I shook my head, trying to compose myself. "I just ran into Nathan," I said, my voice trembling.

"Nathan? As in your ex-fiancé Nathan?" Tonya's eyes widened even further.

"Yes," I replied, nodding. "He... he wanted to talk, but I couldn't. I couldn't handle it, Tonya."

"Oh, Abby," Tonya said softly, pulling me into a comforting hug. "I'm so sorry."

"Let's just get out of here," I whispered, feeling the weight of the encounter pressing down on me. "I'll explain everything in the car."

As we walked to her car, Tonya kept her arm around me, providing silent support. Once we were inside and driving away, I took a deep breath and began to explain.

"He left without a word, Tonya. We were engaged, and he just disappeared overseas. I never knew why. Seeing him today brought it all back, and I just... I couldn't face it."

Tonya nodded, her expression serious. "I get it, Abby. That's a lot to handle. I'm here for you, no matter what."

"Thanks, Tonya," I said, grateful for her understanding. "I just need some time to process all of this."

"Take all the time you need," she replied, giving my hand a reassuring squeeze. She started the car, the engine's hum a comforting background to my turbulent thoughts. As we began to drive away, I couldn't resist the urge to look back. As I did, I saw Nathan standing on the sidewalk, his shoulders slumped and his expression forlorn. His dog sat faithfully by his side, oblivious to the emotional storm that had just passed. The image lingered in my mind as we drove away from the park, the distance between us growing with every second. With a heavy heart, I tried to focus on the road ahead, leaving the past—and Nathan—behind.