Further Foolishness

Ch. 7 - The Grass Bachelor's Guide

With sincere Apologies to the Ladies' Periodicals

There are periods in the life of every married man when

he is turned for the time being into a grass bachelor.

This happens, for instance, in the summer time when his

wife is summering by the sea, and he himself is simmering

in the city. It happens also in the autumn when his wife

is in Virginia playing golf in order to restore her

shattered nerves after the fatigues of the seaside. It

occurs again in November when his wife is in the Adirondacks

to get the benefit of the altitude, and later on through

the winter when she is down in Florida to get the benefit

of the latitude. The breaking up of the winter being,

notoriously, a trying time on the system, any reasonable

man is apt to consent to his wife's going to California.

In the later spring, the season of the bursting flowers

and the young buds, every woman likes to be with her

mother in the country. It is not fair to stop her.

It thus happens that at various times of the year a great

number of men, unable to leave their business, are left

to their own resources as housekeepers in their deserted

houses and apartments. It is for their benefit that I

have put together these hints on housekeeping for men.

It may be that in composing them I owe something to the

current number of the leading women's magazines. If so,

I need not apologise. I am sure that in these days We

Men all feel that We Men and We Women are so much alike,

or at least those of us who call ourselves so, that we

need feel no jealousy when We Men and We Women are striving

each, or both, in the same direction if in opposite ways.

I hope that I make myself clear. I am sure I do.

So I feel that if We Men, who are left alone in our houses

and apartments in the summer-time, would only set ourselves

to it, we could make life not only a little brighter for

ourselves but also a little less bright for those about

us.

Nothing contributes to this end so much as good

housekeeping. The first thing for the housekeeper to

realise is that it is impossible for him to attend to

his housekeeping in the stiff and unbecoming garments of

his business hours. When he begins his day he must

therefore carefully consider--