The voyage

7–Close to home

Over the next few days, James slowly got to know Kate a little more, and in return she seemed more relaxed in his company than she had done the first couple of nights they'd been together.

Today however, he had felt more a yearning for home, knowing that it was drawing ever closer, and that tomorrow they would finally dock. He'd spent all day mulling over maps, the sailing reports, heading and back and forth from his office to the wheelhouse.

It all looked set to be another good day to dock, with conditions not expected to cause any interruption unless they were sent word otherwise.

Kate had also seemed rather chipper when he'd had lunch with her earlier, but still there was some hesitance in her, now not knowing what to do or where to go once they arrived.

He found her stood on the first-class deck, watching as they cut through more miles of open water, darkness setting in once more. "I never put you down as a lurker, captain".

She had sensed him there.

James came and stood beside her, hands in his pockets as he now also looked out. "Edward told me he'd seen you up here for some time. I wanted to see if everything was alright?"

She nodded. "I was thinking about what will happen tomorrow. Once we dock, I start something new - and if I'm honest? I'm rather scared". She glanced to him, "Anna and Rose have offered me a room, from there I can find work..."

"Are you sure that's what you want?" He asked.

She looked at him. "What other choice do I have? I'm not like my mother, too afraid to get her hands dirty. I can find something, you never know, I might be rather good at being a lady's maid".

In truth she really had no idea of just what she would be good at.

"You're more than welcome to take a room at mine until you decide what to do". He told her. "I don't mind..."

Kate smiled sadly. "We both know that it would be the wrong choice, captain", she turned and started to make her way back inside, leaving him there and realising that she knew he had someone waiting for him.

She was right though. It would be wrong. How would he explain to Peggy about a random woman living with him? No woman would like that obviously. Then there was the subject of his mother. She'd think the whole situation ridiculous, including this one once she heard of it, because if he didn't tell her, then Edward or Jimmy would.

Thankfully he wouldn't be seeing anyone who didn't know about this whole charade after the voyage, otherwise they'd have questions as to where his wife had gone and why was he suddenly marrying another woman.

He made his way back to the cabin, coming off duty for the evening and found Kate sat brushing her hair out. She said nothing as she looked at him through the mirror.

"I will miss your grumpiness, as well as the silence you provide". She finally spoke as she got into bed, Steve joining her soon after. She slipped off the ring and gave it back to him, "You should probably shine it, just so there's no suspicion that someone wore it before her".

"You realised then".

"Yes, but she is a lucky woman".

He passed the ring back to her. "Probably best you keep it on until we've disembarked tomorrow". He told her. "Need to put on the front right until the very end".

She reluctantly placed it on her finger once more, James watching and then settling down next to her. "James?"

"Mmmm?" He said, eyes staring through the darkness at the ceiling.

"Maybe after tomorrow, it would be best that we don't see one another again..."

He sat up and looked at her. "Kate, nothing will change..." even now he really wasn't convincing himself, and she could tell.

"You're marrying her..."

"Is that what you want? Because if you're going to be staying with Anna and rose then it'll be pretty tough to avoid".

She said nothing for a moment. "Yes."

He could tell she was unsure, and really didn't know why he felt suddenly how he did. Perhaps it was the realisation of just what tomorrow would bring.

Only now did he realise that she was watching him, and the overwhelming urge to have her seared through his veins.

He leant down and kissed her, expecting to be pushed off and rejected, but her hands now gently grasped his face, kissing him back and ultimately telling him that she wanted this He seemed to forget everything and now his hands shed her of her nightwear as he did with his also.

His lips trailed across her collarbone, James settling between her legs and kissing her deeply before he looked at her. She nodded a silent confirmation to him, letting out a small gasp as he began to push into her, the pain being felt for a short time until it began to ebb away.

Neither had time to think nor care about what they were doing or the consequences, not now they began to move together, James guiding her, ensuring that he didn't cause her any more pain than he already had.

Her small whimpers sounded, turning to gasps as the pleasure began to take over her. His was building, and soon he was thrusting harder and deeper within her. The only task on his mind being that he made her his. Lust clouding his mind and all thoughts or consideration for anything or anyone else.

With one final thrust, he felt himself begin to coat her walls with every last drop, then pulling out and lying next to her to catch his breath.

Neither said a word, the shock and realisation beginning to set in as to what had just happened.

She was damaged goods. Even she knew that

And as for James? He knew that perhaps he had just made a mistake that would cost him dearly. Guilt and regret starting to linger. "We should sleep" Is all that he now said, the distance in his voice clear.

Kate said nothing, rolling onto her side. Confused as to the sudden change of attitude and feeling now like perhaps he was no different than any other man. She now felt he had simply wanted her for one thing, and she was disappointed in herself that she had let her guard down so easily.