The Birth Of The Beta

13. WINNIFRED’S CONFESSION

Undoubtedly, there had been a light bounce in Winnifred’s steps lately. She felt more motivated and happier than she had known was possible. She had always been cheerful, but lately she couldn’t contain her joy. She knew the reason for the elevation in her mood. Every time she thought about him, her toes gripped on to her sandals and her heart galloped in her chest to the point of discomfort. She was still sixteen, so although she knew her wolf was within her, she couldn’t feel the tingles yet. Luckily, she didn’t need the tingles to confirm what she knew in her soul. She wondered when she would be able to notice his scent clearly. He did smell amazing, he had a minty undertone to his fragrance, but it didn’t entice her like she had been told it would. Was that because she didn’t have a wolf? There was an age gap between them and Winnifred convinced herself that he was waiting for her. If it was the other way around, she knew she would wait for him. After much debating, she decided to ask Aoife for advice. She would help her, she always did.

Slicing some fruit on to a small platter, she headed towards Aoife’s room, only to find her friend pulling her body off the ground, while holding onto a thin bar that dangled from the grate in the ceiling. She was every inch the warrior. Winnifred couldn’t help but wonder if that was the kind of woman Pepin would prefer. Maybe she should ask if she could train with Aoife. She was so nervous even her thoughts were rambling.

“Winnifred, are you OK? I’ve shouted your name a few times,” Aoife asked with concern, as she jumped down from the bar.

“Sorry, I was just wondering if you could teach me to be strong like you are,” Winnifred answered.

“Of course I can, but why the sudden interest?” Aoife countered.

“I think I’ve found my mate!” Winnifred gushed with excitement as a rosy glow kissed her cheeks.

Aoife was happy her friend thought she had found her soul mate, but sixteen was very young to detect those types of feelings, especially with the conviction that Winnie was declaring. Inviting Winnie to sit on her bed, they ate the fruit that sat between them. It wasn’t rushed as Aoife was preplanning ways to question her without causing any upset, and Winnie was trying to put all the meaningful encounters she had had with Pepin into chronological order. The young wolf was too aware of her friend’s scepticism, and was determined to quash her doubts.

Taking a moment to study Winnie’s face, she could see her cheeks were higher and fuller from the permanent smile that pulled at her face. Aoife opened her eyes wider and nodded her head a little to encourage her friend to begin, and with this support a landslide of words tumbled out of her mouth.

“I think he knows I’m his mate because he has his wolf already, but he is so respectful that he is waiting for my wolf to appear. He asked when my birthday was and I think he was trying to see how long he would have to wait, before he could tell me the truth. Whenever he sees me lifting heavy trays, he helps me carry them, just takes them off me to rescue my arms. One night he came to the kitchen and saw me on my tip-toes trying to reach for a bowl. He leant over me and passed it down, reluctant to witness me struggling. Every time I see him he notices my headband change and asks where I bought it, I think he’s trying to work out my favourite market stall so he can surprise me,” Winnifred paused to take a breath, and Aoife used the gap to ask her a question.

“These are really nice things, but it might just make him a nice person. Why are you so convinced he’s your mate, Winnie?”

“He was worried I wasn’t getting enough sleep,” Winnifred stopped and realised that didn’t equate to mate. “You were there Aoife, didn’t you think his behaviour was more than that of a friend when he made a point of complimenting my food on the day Magnus arrived. They say that food cooked by a mate always tastes better. When I came to your door with the honey cake he was so quick to jump up and help me carry it in. he let me win TIC TAC TOE for many games to keep me smiling. Isn’t that something that a wolf would do to keep his mate happy? Oh! And…and…and I was sad on the night before your birthday and he held my hand. I’m sure it was to feel tingles, but it comforted me. Plus, I feel awful for asking him to take the apples to the horses. That request made him face those horrible women and I’ve never wanted to hurt anybody so badly in my life before!” Winnifred’s verbal avalanche had come to its end, finishing on a frantic note, beneath the rocks of her fervour. Aoife was buried beneath the weight of her words.

She was talking about Pepin.

Neve, her wolf, was snarling in her head, being terrifyingly territorial, causing her human to have to take a step away from Winnie as she tried to control her reactions. Various ways of handling this perceived threat from Neve’s perspective were rotating around Aoife’s head. She tried to make it clear to her wolf that Winnie was only mistaken, and had a minor crush. She was like a younger sister to them, and didn’t deserve this treatment. Aoife had to navigate the precarious balance between being firm with Winnie without hurting her feelings. It was an emotional scale she had little experience with.

“All these things are lovely, but Pepin is a lovely person and he has a good heart. He isn’t your mate though,” Aoife said softly.

“You can’t know that, you’re not the Moon Goddess, Aoife” Winnifred argued back, defensively.

“I don’t need to be the Moon Goddess Winnie, I know he’s not your mate, because he’s mine,” Aoife had tried to retain her soft approach, but the last words were delivered with finality.

“But…he asked if he could call me Winnie,” She uttered, completely defeated.

The prickly red heat felt like a rash as it climbed up Winnifred’s throat and chest. Her toes were curled so tightly that there was a genuine possibility of them popping through the leather sole of her sandal. If the Moon Goddess was merciful, she would allow the floor to swallow her whole before she had to look Aoife in the eye. Since the floor didn’t digest her in a mission of mercy, she raised her eyes to look at her friend.

“I’m really sorry, Aoife. I genuinely thought he was my mate,” Winnifred muttered quietly as the shame stamped on her ability to speak. Lurching forward, Aoife wrapped her friend in a hug. The strength of her grip and the density of muscle around her, helped the younger she-wolf to battle her embarrassment. Aoife nuzzled her to bring comfort like she would a younger sister, and Neve didn’t protest, which was as good as they could hope from her.

“It’s OK Winnifred, I’m sorry you were wrong this time, but next time you come to me with this news I’m sure it will be because you will have found him,” Aoife smiled, hearteningly.

Aoife wished that Winnifred wasn’t hurting, and tried to take the sting from the realisation that Pepin had just been kind.

“I think you were sent these feelings to help me. You and Cornelius are the closest people I have to family, and your approval means everything to me. The fact that you liked him so much just proves that he is a lovely person,” Aoife stroked her hair as she reassured her nothing had to change.

Winnifred smiled and nodded, making no further comment. She picked up the tray and headed towards the door.

“You won’t tell him, will you?” Winnifred asked.

“Of course not. Not if you don’t want me too,” Aoife replied.

Aoife hadn’t lied, Winnie had really helped her. Neve was adamant that they marked Pepin as soon as possible, and Aoife’s joint desire for this made her realise that she loved Pepin. She never wanted to be without him. She was able to face these feelings, and for once she didn’t feel fear, but a calm commitment that led her to the certainty of her devotion. She was more terrified of never having him at all, than having him and losing him. He was hers, and she loved him.

Winnifred left the room, only to let the uplift in her face drop, and the pain in her chest slice through her like she was a useless soft fruit. She knew now that he wasn’t her mate, but the reality of that had little impact on the love she still felt for him. He may not be her mate, but she knew she would do anything for him regardless.