The Princess of Light and Dark

8.The Cottage

The lord under the mountain is dead, and I am lost forever.

Or so I thought, the bone deep chill of the snowy mountain air entered my lungs like needles prickling my skin and I jolted awake. I wasn’t lost, I was floating through the air inside a cocoon of black clouds. I tried to broaden my senses, my hearing, vision, smell but none of those seemed to give me any clues as to where exactly I was, all I know is I am still within reach of the Northern Mountain, the cold tells me that much. I tried to move but my body seems permanently frozen in place. Thuria! She must be fighting my control. That’s why I can’t move. I tried and tried to push her out into the back of my mind, but her pain, fear and anger where stronger and after what felt like hours I faded into the vast nothingness.

**

Warmth. I felt it slowly filling me up like a jug under a tap, first my fingers and arms, my legs and back next and finally my chest. With my chest warm my lungs felt free and I took a long deep breath. The scent of moss, damp and dust filled my nostrils making me cough. I slowly opened my eyes and looked around with hooded eyes, there was no natural light, just small oil lamps dotted around a very messy room, I sat slowly, my head spinning and my neck sore and stiff. I rubbed the base of my neck with my hand and sighed. Where in the stars am I?! I looked around me once more and noticed the piles of books everywhere, there was a fire in the middle of the room, but it remained unlit, the sofa I sat on was old and ripped, the dust particles flew all around the place, making my nose itch. I stood up and after fighting the bile rising in my throat I moved, the place was old and obviously abandoned, judging by the piles of stuff, dust and cobwebs everywhere, I wondered around the place for a while, two medium sized bedrooms to the back and a far too luxurious bathroom between them, a long corridor led me back to the ample living area and to the left a kitchen with another unlit fire. I peered out the windows and noticed I was in the woods, just by the edge of a vast forest. I didn’t want to go out there, but the need to know where I was, was stronger than my need to eat and rest. Out the door I turned back and finally saw the straw roof of the lovely little cottage. Around the place where overflowing flower planters and vegetable patches. I wondered how long it had been since someone had happened upon this place. I wondered around the edge of the forest for a couple of hours, the weather was nice, not too cold for night-time, the sky was overcast, dark and lifeless. I walked circles around the cottage, my mind was in shambles, Thuria wasn’t answering me, and I had no idea what to do. I am a murderer. In the quiet of the night, my mind filled with Lord Lupis’ pained screams, the sight of his body contorting in agony, the echoes of his bones snapping and breaking… My chest tightened and the air got stuck in my throat, my vision swam, and I fell to my knees next to an enormous tree. I focused my senses on it, my hand reached out and I touched the rough bark on it, how did I miss this tree? I had been walking around here for hours, how had I not seen such a big tree? My hand stroked the bark once more and the tree shimmered. The unexpectedness of such a thing made me fall backwards, my bottom lading hard on my heels. I looked in awe as the giant tree in front of me turned into a rainbow-coloured oak tree. Tears filled my eyes, I know where I am. Relief filled my bones and I sagged on my side beneath the rainbow tree, and I fell into a blacked sleep.

**

For 3 years I have been hiding out at Elladan’s cottage, that first night I slept under his tree I had woken up when the sun was already high in the sky, I had woken up intending on marching myself right back home, but the more steps I took towards the path out of the forest, the more my heart seized in my chest. I am a killer now; I am not the sweet mischievous princess that followed Sarnarel out of that window. And so, with my heart shattered in pieces and my mind full of thoughts about my family, the man I murdered and my fated I turned on my heels and ran back to the safety of Elladan’s cottage. And so, for the past 3 years I had learned how to depend on myself, I had slowly cleaned out the cottage, I had read all his spell books, filling my head with power and knowledge, I had farmed the patches of veg and flowers outside, enough to sustain myself, I had taught myself to whittle spears and even a bow and arrows made from sharpened metal spoons, I learned to hunt the wildlife that dared come close to the cottage to feast on my veg. Solitude had given me a chance to grow like I never did in those dungeons. Thuria hadn’t awakened with me, and hard as I try, I cannot reach her. According to the cuts on the door frame today marks the 3rd year I have been here, and to celebrate I decided to cook myself a feast of venison and potatoes. The meat rests in a pot of herbs above the slow small fire in the kitchen, and since there is no one else to tend to I decided to spoil myself with a long hot bath. The water took hours to warm in the living room fire, but as I sink my tired bones into it, and the heat calms my pains and aches I find myself thinking it was worth the hard work. I lay in the water until it turns cold and brown from the mud and dirt on my skin, nails and hair. I spend a lot of time tending to the garden and fighting with sticks against the poor trees in the clearing nearby, when I can I read underneath Elladan’s tree. My first clue that something was different was the soft thud in the distance, my ears picked up another soft thud, closer this time, so I stood from the water and wrapped my cloak around my wet body, slowly opening the door out onto the corridor, I poked my head out, no one was there, so I slowly walked out, the sound of quiet whispers could be heard clearly now, why had I left my bow and arrows outside? The crippling fear that it could be Sarnarel’s men outside gripped my heart like a fist, but I soon shook it away, even though Thuria had left me, she hadn’t left me completely powerless, and with all the spells I had been reading I felt well equipped to deal with whatever warriors awaited me.

A deep breath later and I had summoned a small explosive spell into my hand, the hot ball of orange energy hummed quietly as I walked quietly towards the whispered voices, 2 of them, perhaps Sarnarel had underestimated me, sending only 2 warriors, but he was too cunning for that, he probably had dozens of them waiting in the forest, hidden all around.

As I got closer the voices grew louder, they didn’t sound like warriors, more interested in why the cottage was cleaned and had someone in it. It was now or never, I walked forward from the darkness of the corridor into the faint light of the oil lamps and the fires, I stood there watching them both, their backs turned to me, they hadn’t noticed me yet, so I had time to observe them, definitely not warriors, they wore simple tunics in tones of blue and black and although both had swords sheathed on their waists they didn’t look like seasoned soldiers. The energy ball in my palm grew slightly bigger as I prepared to attack, it launched and as it flew towards the unsuspecting elves, the taller of the two pushed the other to the side and the ball exploded into the kitchen fire, throwing my dinner everywhere. I growled in frustration as the 2 men stood up slowly cleaning bits of food and soot off of their clothes. I turned toward the one who had sensed me first and as more energy balls grew in my palms my eyes roamed him, looking for weaknesses, but the only thing I found was a very tall, lean muscled elf staring back at me, as his eyes roamed me head to toe I did the same, taking in the way his legs seemed to be as tall as all of me, his shoulders, arms and chest broad, strong, but soft at the same time, his eye brows looked wild, but in a soft way, and his eyes, those honey coloured eyes that shone and shimmered in the soft light of the oil lamps had me hypnotised, I could almost drown in the sweetness of them, his nose isn’t too big or small, it has a small crook half way down it but it adds to his overall good looks, his cheekbones extend from the very top of his lip to the middle of his perfectly proportionate ears, they are sharp and well defined, so sharp I could cut my fingers just grazing them. His top lip is thin and although the bottom one is slightly plumper, I prefer the top one, his jaw is very well defined and strong. But the eyes, they are what call to me, those eyes are so familiar, the way they shine with nothing, but goodness makes my heart skip a beat. The elf took a step towards me, and I backed away, my hand by my side, another spell at the ready. His eyes roamed my face once more and then he spoke.

“Elvira?” My name leaving his lips knocked the breath out of my lungs and I gasped. “Elvira is it really you?” He asked, moving closer to me. I raised my hands, the orange glow of the exploding spells lighting his features better, and, in that moment, I knew my life was about to change once more.

“ElRey?” I asked, my voice no more than a croak. He nodded, his eyes filling with tears as he looked to the other elf and called him “Calen, get the horses. It’s her.” The other elf, Calen, my childhood friend, smiled at us and dashed out the door to get the horses as instructed by ElRey, my cousin. I just simply stood there staring at him, I hadn’t seen him in 10 years and the boy I had left behind was certainly long gone. He approached me slowly as if walking towards a wounded wild animal, his eyes trained on mine, I couldn’t look away, the way his eyes swirled like molten hot honey being stirred, was driving me crazy, I knew I had seen his eyes before, of course I had, I grew up with him, but they weren’t this beautifully captivating when we were 13. His warm breath fanned my face and I swallowed dryly, his proximity was doing strange things to me, my palms became sweaty, and my heart hammered in my chest, I could feel my breath hitching in my throat, I felt trapped, ElRey’s warm eyes, suddenly morphing into cold silver ones, my legs involuntarily moved me back, away from him and his smile dropped a little. His body moved again, slower, closer, and as his hand reached for my face Calen walked in,

“The horses are ready, if we leave now, we can be home by first light.” He walked towards us and I couldn’t help but notice the shy brown haired boy I grew up with had also become a man, his features more rugged than ElRey’s could only mean he had followed his father’s footsteps and he had joined the royal guard. “Elvira, it’s good to see you again. We’ve all missed you so much.” He moved like a lion pouncing on its prey and within seconds his arms had wrapped around me like a vice. Calen is much stronger than he appears, I patted his back and croaked out an I can’t breathe, and he let go chuckling “Sorry, I never thought this day would come, your parents are going to go crazy when we get home.”

Home, the word left a bad taste in my mouth, and I hadn’t even spoken it, the look on my face must have been transparent because both men looked at each other than me again

“Elvira, you do want to go home, right?” ElRey asked, but before I could answer him Calen interrupted us.

“Of course, she wants to go home, it’s been 10 years El, I’m sure she wants nothing more than to see her family. She is the future queen after all.”

Their voices had become but a distant sound, in the back of my head. I must be dreaming, home, I can go home, to a family who remembers a small mischievous princess, who loved to turned guards into frogs and frighten the kitchen maidens with silly spells, friends who remember a kind, wild child, with no fears, no traumas, no pain, no regret. They don’t know what I have been through, how can I face my mother, my sweet, diplomatic mother, how can I look her in the eyes and tell her I took pleasure killing a man? An evil man, but I still tortured him and killed him in cold blood. I can’t go home, I won’t…

“No.” I whispered, getting the attention of the 2 bickering elves, “I can’t go back.”

“What do you mean you can’t go back? Elvira, we have been searching for 10 years. We finally found you.”

“We aren’t letting you go again,” Calen interrupted El, and the latter cursed under his breath, “Elvira, your father never forgave himself, neither did your mother, they want you back. Please.”

“You don’t understand, I’m not the same person.” I tried to explain but ElRey took a page out of Calen’s book and interrupted me,

“Neither are we, we have spent half our lives looking for you. Stars Elvira, no one will give a s**t who you are now, they just want you back, so they can get to know the you you are now.”

I scoffed, but the men didn’t waver.

“I need time, can we go in the morning?” I needed to stall, the plan was already formed in my head, slip out when they sleep and run as fast as I can away from here, maybe either take a horse or free them so they can’t catch up with me.

“Calen, you ride ahead, warn everyone we are arriving in three days’ time.” ElRey faced me, “Is that enough time?” I nodded and after an awkward goodbye, Calen left. I stood like a statue by the corridor, while ElRey moved into the kitchen, he turned around slowly observing the mess around him.

“So, what are we eating then?”