ONP 4: Not Feeling Well
"MA'AM BLYTHE, OKAY lang po kayo?" tanong ni Kelly as she brought me my snacks.
Agad akong napatakip ng ilong nang maamoy ang dala niya. It is a red velvet cake which is my favorite.
Actually, I am not feeling well. Since I woke up, I had a throbbing head and nausea. I didn't take proper breakfast as Geordane advised me because I really felt so lazy and sick. Pinilit ko lang na ubusin 'yong isang slice ng wheat bread at uminom ng gatas para hindi magutom ang anak ko.
"Damn! Kelly, please get that food away from me!" mabilis na utos ko at nasigawan pa siya.
I didn't mean to shout at her. Talagang hindi ko lang matagalan ang amoy ng pagkain.
Mabilis niya iyong kinuha sa mesa ko pero nandoon ang gulat at pag-aalala sa mga mata niya. She even smells the food. Nagtataka siyang tinignan ako.
"P-Pero Ma'am, gusto n'yo 'to, 'di ba? Hindi naman po mabaho, e."
"Just . . . Argh! Alisin mo na lang kasi. Bilis!" singhal ko. Hindi ko na talaga makayanan ang amoy.
I immediately went to the bathroom and retched. Halos manghina ako habang naduduwal. Kahit wala na sa paningin ko 'yong cake ay nanunuot pa rin sa ilong ko ang amoy nito. I upchucked 'til I am contented.
I washed my face and had a toothbrush. Today, I will be meeting my VIP client from Italy, the reason why I need to fix myself and be presentable.
Tinawagan ko ulit si Kelly para mag-order ng pagkain para sa akin. I tell her to order Arbiatta Pasta and Lemon Ceylon Tea from a nearby Restaurant. She immediately does what I say. Medyo nagging okay naman ang pakiramdam ko nang matanggal na sa pang-amoy at paligid ko ang amoy ng cheesecake.
Dahil marami pa akong oras, I decided to do rounds within the different departments of my company. I made sure they are all doing their works.
Masaya ako sa success ng kompanya ko. Lahat ng ito ay galing sa ipon ko at sa paghihirap ko. Gusto ko na makilala ang SDI at ako dahil doon, at hindi dahil sa katotohanang tagapagmana ako ng Montreal Empire.
Tulad ni Kuya na kilalang-kilala na bilang doktor ay palagi kaming naikukumpara, pero lagi ko ring sinasabi sa mga interviews ko na magkaiba kami ni Bryce ng ginagalawan na trabaho at malinaw sa amin na walang kompetisyon. Me and my brother supports each other's success.
"Good Afternoon, everyone . . ." nakangiting bati ko nang umentrada sa Finance Department.
It's just two in the afternoon, and everyone seems busy that they didn't notice my arrival. Halatang nagulat sila nang makita ako, but I just smiled.
"G-good afternoon, Miss Blythe," bati ng Head of Finance sa akin.
"So, how was your day today? Kamusta ang trabaho ninyo rito, Jessica?" I asked.
"Ahm, okay naman po Ma'am, actually tinatapos na lang ng team ko 'yong inventory for the upcoming Expo."
"Good to know." I started to roam my sight around.
Natigil naman ako sa paglalakad nang bigla akong makaramdam ng pagkahilo. Naramdaman ko na lang na may mga kamay na umalalay sa akin.
"Ma'am, are you okay? Maputla po kayo . . ." It was Jessica in her worried tone.
I nodded. "I'm okay! Nahilo lang. I need a rest afterward. Thank you," saad ko at iniayos ang sarili sa pagkakatayo. I smiled saka naglakad ulit.
"Are you sure, Ma'am?"
Tumango ako at ipinakita sa lahat na ayos lang ako. I need to be okay for today. Nagkatinginan lang ang mga tao sa loob pero walang may lakas ng loob na magsalita pa. Inayos ko ang tayo ko saka ipinagpatuloy ang paglilibot hanggang sa lumipat ako sa ibang departamento.
"Jessica, here's the report na pinasa mo kay Kelly. I already signed it. Kayo na ang bahala d'yan." Nilahad ko ang folder sa dalaga.
Agad na binuksan ni Jessica ang folder at napamulat sa nakita. Napangiti na lang ako sa reaksyon niya.
"Thank you, Ma'am!" Nag-bow pa ito at niyakap ang folder.
I just signed their proposal for a short vacation in Palawan next month. Hindi lang iyon dahil sagot ko rin ang kanilang plane fair and resort accommodation for three days and two nights. Maganda kasi ang kanilang performance for the first quarter of the month. It's a reward for their department.
"I hope you'll all enjoy the vacay. You deserved it all."
Hindi na bago sa akin ang ganito. Last year I treated the Design Dept. in Sta. Cruz Island in Zamboanga was known as the Pink Sand Beach in the Philippines.
"We will Ma'am. Mamaya po sasabihin ko sa buong Department ang tungkol sa magandang balita na ito. Thank you talaga, Ma'am."
I nodded. "Go back to your work now!"
I exhaled hardly when pain stretches through my head again—this time, I need to lean on the wall to support myself. Agad naman akong dinaluhan ni Kelly na marahil ay kararating lang mula sa utos ko kanina.
"Ma'am, mukha po talaga kayong may sakit. Dalhin ko na kaya kayo sa infirmary—"
Itinaas ko ang kamay ko para pigilan siya. I managed to look okay at hinarap si Kelly.
"Kailangan ko lang ng kaunting pahinga sa opisina."
Hindi na ako nag-aksaya ng oras at tinungo na ang elevator. Sa loob, pilit kong kinakalma ang sarili at pinikit ang mga mata sa buong durasyon ng pagbabalik namin sa fifth floor.
Sa nakalipas na ilang araw ay mas napapadalas ang pagkaramdam ko ng hilo at pagsusuka pero binabalewala ko lang iyon. I regularly take those vitamins and pain killers na niriseta sa akin ni Geordane.
Siguro mamaya pagkatapos ng meeting ay didiretso ako ng uwi at magpapahinga. Mukhang tama si Elisha na dapat umiwas ako sa stress lalo na at nasa unang trimester pa lang ako ng pagbubuntis.
"Ma'am, iyan na po pala ang mga pinabili n'yong pagkain," Kelly told me as we arrived at my office.
"Thanks, Kelly. Pwede mo na akong iwan muna."
Tumalikod na ako saka dumiretso sa lounge at humilata sa kama. I'm not asleep, but the smooth fabric and the cold aircon made my eyes heavy and shut it after a while. Medyo gumagaan na ang bigat ng ulo ko. Hindi na rin ako nasusuka. I just badly needed to rest my body and mind. Nadala lang siguro ako sa trabaho at problema kaya naman binabawian na ako ng matinding sakit sa ulo at pregnancy tantrums.
I twisted my body on the other side. I hugged the pillow and made myself be at peace for a moment. Allowing myself to time travel from the memoirs of my Italy romance.
The night of the Exhibit and Masquerade ball was the wildest night I ever experienced. The first and the last experience I had in my twenty-six years of existence. On how I turned from a fine woman into a lady, I didn't foresee I would be.
I was a damsel in distress saved by an Italian cavalier dressed in a gold standard suit and black mask. I remembered him clearly when he was still covered. He is tall, probably in his six feet and five. Broad shoulder, strong biceps, and his voice, it's low and inscrutable, but I can't deny the enticing attraction I had for him, not until I knew who he was.
Lunod na ako noon sa kalasingan, and the last thing I remembered was, had s*x together. It wasn't plain s*x or a one-night stand. He takes me to heaven so tenderly, so dreamily that I don't care even if we both don't know each other.
I swallowed as the fear arise from the pit of my soul. Minsan, mas mabuti pang wala kang alam dahil hindi mas lalalim ang iniisip mo tungkol sa isang bagay. Sana talaga hindi ko na inalam kung sino ang nakasiping ko noong gabing iyon.
Unti-unting iminulat ko ang aking mga mata nang makabalik sa kasalukuyan. I stared at the ceiling blankly. The cold breeze from the aircon made me hugged myself.
Of all the men in the world, bakit siya pa?
Iniisip ko rin noong nakaraan na sinong matinong babae ang magbibigay ng sarili niya sa lalaking hindi niya naman kilala. But I haul over the coals on that thought.
I know him. Every inch of him, I've always known him. And I once dreamt of wanting him for my picture of always and forever.
I sighed. Pinalis ko ang ideyang iyon.
I stood up and decided to change my clothes. First thing, I rewashed my face and put moisturizer on it. I chose the pastel floral knee-length dress and paired it with a white stiletto. Naging abala rin ako sa paglalagay ng light makeup sa mukha. Actually, I'm not fun of putting layers of makeup into my face. I've contended with a BB Cream and a small amount of concealer to hide my eye bags, bronzer, and lip tint. I don't have to draw lines on my eyebrows because I had the perfect pair of them in envious fleek. Just a few strokes of eyebrow lasher and viola!
Lumabas na ako at saktong nakita kong pumasok si Kelly. "Ma'am, your client is here now," bungad niya sa akin. "Okay. Let him in."
Tumalikod na ako para ihanda ang sarili ko sa pag-welcome sa bisita. Nagtungo ako sa malawak na glass wall na siyang nagsisilbing dingding sa aking opisina. Mula sa kinatatayuan ay nakikita ko ang kabuuan ng siyudad. Mga nagtatayugang gusali at tila langgam na mga sasakyan sa kalsada.
"E 'un piacere salutarvi un bel pomeriggio, signora Montreal." (It's a pleasure to greet you a nice afternoon, Miss Montreal.)
Parang nabato ako sa kinatatayuan nang marinig ang napakapamilyar na boses na iyon mula sa likuran. Kanina lang ay sa utak ko lang naririnig ang boses na iyon. I couldn't move my feet and it feels like I am going to collapse any moment by now.
It was a cold baritone voice, but I can definitely sense the tease behind it. I want to hit my head for remembering the folder Kelly handed to me three days ago. I didn't manage to check on it.
I heard his footsteps going closer to me. Mariin lang akong napapikit at pilit na kinalma ang sarili.
When I got enough strength to face my unexpected client, I turned around slowly, having the wide opportunity to see the man behind that familiar voice.
He is taller than the last time I saw him. Gorgeous hombre with his tousled-up ash brown hair and those enticing pair of cornflower shade of blue eyes I hadn't had any chance to see before I stormed out of that room in Italy two months ago.
He is simply the mature version of a young man I'd fallen for a long time. The man who out caged my free spirit that night.
Biglang lumakas ang t***k ng puso ko nang magsalubong ang aming mga mata. He dropped his eyes down to my body, studying me thoroughly.
Pinilit kong itinago ang kaba at kakaunting takot nang makaharap at makilala ang sinasabing big time client ko. Parang biglang nawala ang nag-uumapaw na confidence ko sa katawan nang hindi naaalis ang mapanuring titig niya sa akin.
"Sembra che tu sia totalmente sorpreso dalla mia presenza." (You seem to be totally surprised by my presence.)
His voice containing a note of amusement and a hint of disbelief.
Pilit akong ngumiti at humakbang paatras. I composed myself and tried to look elegant and respected.
"No, ero solo preoccupato di qualcosa. A proposito, benvenuto al Solstice Design Institute, Signore Casteliogne." (No, I was just preoccupied with something. By the way, welcome to Solstice Design Institute, Mr. Casteliogne.) I offered a handshake to him.
He accepted it with a wide grin. I can't let his presence ruined my composure. I smiled back at him, setting aside all the fears and panic I had within myself.
I looked away as I get my hand back. My heart pushed into my throat, unable to think clearly. It was a miracle that I uttered a nice Italian reply to him.
Inutusan ko agad si Kelly na magdala ng dessert at coffee para sa kliyente. Inayos ko ang folder at laptop na kailangan sa presentation habang siya ay magarang naupo sa gitnang upuan na nasa mini-conference table dito sa opisina ko.
In that angle, I vividly got charmed by the defined physique of him. I suddenly remembered all the memories I had with him. His lips tickling my neck down through my collarbones down to my n*****s and back to my thirsty lips. His heat against mine and his pounding response into every moan I oath.
Fuck it!
I silently cursed myself from thinking that. May oras pa akong balikan 'yon habang nasa harap ko na nga ang lalaking kasama ko sa makamundong pagnanasa na iyon.
"Can we start the meeting, Mr. Casteliogne?" I said, looking at him straightly.
His stormy eyes bore to me, and his expression was hard and curious at once. His jaw hardened as his gaze locked into my lips. I can't help but bite the lower part of it because of uneasiness.
"You used to call me Khyfer back then." That made me looked up to him.
I had to suppress my thought of him. Hindi na ako natutuwa sa mga nangyayari. I started to feel hysterical, and my biggest secret is in danger.
"It was a long time ago. Besides, you're here for business, right? So, might as well to address you with a proper formality." I hardly smile at him, but I suddenly saw slight emotions in his features before it was completely gone.
"Yeah, you're right. It was a long time ago . . . I thought both of us are exemptions." He shrugged his shoulder and fixed his coat.
Tumalikod na ako at naunang pumunta sa unahan pero ilang hakbang pa lang ay agad akong napahawak sa sentido nang muling bumalatay ang sakit sa aking ulo. Muntik pa akong mawalan ng balanse nang makaramdam ulit ng mas matinding sakit.
Damn it! Akala ko okay na ako?
"Ma'am / Are you okay?" magkasabay pa nilang sabi ng babaeng kasama ni Khyfer.
Hindi ko magawang sumagot. Napapikit ako habang iniinda ang sakit. Pero mas napamura lang ako nang mahinahon nang biglang lumabo ang paningin ko. Napilitan na akong itukod ang mga kamay ko sa arm part ng couch bilang pangsuporta sa sarili. Sobrang nahihilo na ako na tipong isang galaw na lang ay matutumba na talaga ako nang tuluyan.
"Is there any problem?" Bakas na ang pag-aalala sa boses niya pero hindi ko magawang sumagot.
I made few moves pero sa huling pagtangka kong tumayo ay hindi ko na kinaya. Ramdam ko na rin ang butil ng pawis sa noo at ilalim ng ilong ko, sobrang nanlalabo na rin ang paningin ko.
Hindi ko na talaga kaya. Unti-nting kumawala ang mga kamay ko sa pagkakahawak sa couch at tuluyang natumba kasabay ng mga hawak kong papeles at laptop.
"Blythe!"