Without Me

Casualty

And dorm time with Shou.

He couldn't quite get his thoughts to settle down when he started thinking about it again but he didn't want to seem distracted either. He ended up staring at the sparkling lake, seemingly still lost in thought but Mark's presence was enough to actually keep him there. Most of him, at least.

They were getting along quite well even with Jonathan's efforts to try not to ask the other personal or private questions. They had rather similar likes as well as interests so there were quite the number of topic to chat about even though they had a pretty comfortable silence even when neither said anything. And mostly just trying not to think about the kiss either. He didn't want to tolerate the idea of getting into a relationship or anything even distinctively close for now.

Just friends. Just friends. Just friends.

Those words swirled in his mind like a chant. He tried to keep calm mostly as they talked, not wanting to expose any of his inner thoughts by accident. Mark seemed cool with just talking about hobbies and such as well so it wasn't too big of a problem.

Once they were done, they both headed back to school and went their own ways again. Jonathan was quite glad Mark didn't mind the idea of them not being seen together in public. He just didn't want any more unnecessary trouble to deal with honestly even if he did want to get to know Mark better as a person of his own and not just baseless rumors or stories told by others.

Once he was back in his dorm, he got ready for bed. Shou entered the dorm just as he laid down on his bed. He shifted his position to look down at Shou who seemed tired. He kicked his shoes aside and sat on the chair, writing some stuff down on papers again.

"Found anything?" Jonathan asked. He noticed the flinch and guessed he must've had startle Shou by accident. The other turned around, making sure it was Jonathan before shaking his head.

"Not even close. It's really hard to avoid the teachers. As well as the prying eyes of busybody students," Shou grumbled as he turned back to write things down. "I've barely searched around the main school building. At this rate, I'm not sure if I'll get anywhere."

Jonathan hummed and nodded. The school wasn't too vast but one person searching for something alone was a tad difficult especially when you don't know what exactly are you looking for either. He wondered if he could help but he didn't want to skip classes or lose any time with his friends. He gave it some thought and hummed again.

"I can help you look on Saturdays. When we have free time. Sunday too. We can use PE sessions to search," he offered and Shou nodded without turning around.

"Sounds good to me. As long as you don't mind helping me out," he replied nonchalantly. Jonathan nodded.

"That's settled then. Maybe I'll ask my fr-"

"No!" Shou's sudden snap made Jonathan stop talking. "I mean... please don't tell anyone else about this. I can't afford to have extra casualties."

Jonathan paused and nodded again. He guessed it was risky to do so. If they get curious, much like Mark. Too close for his own good. Jonathan tried not to think of him for now. This problem was about Shou and the school. Nothing to do with Mark.

"Have you ever asked others for help?" Jonathan decided to ask just to try to get to know the other a little better.

"No. Well, maybe once? But it didn't go well," Shou replied with a shrug and Jonathan gave him another nod. "It's fine. I've been doing fine alone so far anyways."

"Alone..." He thought of his times being alone and then Ares popped up in his mind. Alone. He did wonder why sometimes being alone was just much better. No worries, problems or anything. Just you and you alone. Nothing else matters.

Nothing.

Jonathan wasn't sure when he fell asleep but he did. Maybe after the rather down thoughts but he woke up the next morning feeling better. He yawned and stretched before climbing down the bunk bed.

"Okay. Another day to go," he mumbled tiredly to himself as he turned off the alarm that was already blaring in the room. Shou got up this time but allowed Jonathan to use the bathroom first since the other had classes to get to.

Before he exited the room, he asked Shou if he knew anywhere that had a socket since the other did explore the school.

"Yeah, a couple of places. Why are you asking? It's not like we need them anyways," Shou replied. Jonathan laughed nervously and shook his head.

"It's nothing. Yeah. Don't think too much about it," he said as he quickly left the dorm to avoid Shou from interrogating him. He was going to keep his phone safe with him.

He guessed the library was the first place he could find for a socket. He hadn't been there but he hoped he would find at least at computer section or something that he could use to charge his phone. As long as he doesn't get caught. He did wonder why they implement such a rule. He started to wonder how were family going to contact them in case of emergencies. Did the office have a public phone they could use? He realised he hadn't done much adventuring yet but decided he would leave that for when he really needed it. For now, he just need to find a socket as well as whatever it is that could aid Shou in his investigations.

The thought made him feel as though Shou could be a private investigator in the future, seeing how he seemed really into this whole thing which really wasn't any of Jonathan's business yet he couldn't let Shou go about it alone. Sometimes he felt like maybe the thought of having a missing roommate would make him more curious than he currently was. At least Shou could give him updates on things now but if he hadn't even tried to get to know Shou, maybe the other would have already gone missing and Jonathan would be the next.

For all he knows.