Endearment is not a gamble

Chapter - 10

To kill somebody you do not know, perhaps it makes you feel a little more numb, a little more soothed from the life you lead. To kill somebody you know, maybe it can make you feel relieved. Like a weight has been lifted, yet your chest has been torn apart if it be a friend, and the numbness will soon settle. To kill somebody you love dearly, your family, all you can think about is how much it hurts. But even then, it never truly is the pain. The hurt you feel shies away from the surface, or at least masks itself from you, intertwining the pain with a numbness that you can only succumb to.

Anybody and everybody would kill to enfold into the tempting dark numbness that could only be the aftermath of death…

~

It hurt to have my thoughts pried forcefully from my own head. It hurt very, very much. The barbed wire was scorching hot and I could feel it frying against the memories of mine I so wished not to share with Clay…

In his mind, however, I could see it all. I felt like I was seeing the whole universe, just locked up inside his mind. The icy cold thoughts of his prey on nights out, the warm sensation when the blood filled his body, it was so… so…

Beautiful.

But when the blurs, the chains of thoughts slowed down… what I saw… what I saw, it broke my heart. It burned in my stomach, it tortured my sights.

- - - - - - - - - -

“How do you feel, brother?” Joseph asked him. He looked up at his older brother stood in front of him in a tuxedo and a smile on his face, despite his knowledge. Yes, Joseph knew all about him and his needs. About him and his monstrous transformation. And yet, Joseph had not left his side. Always caring, always helping as much as he could.

He sighed. “Tired.”

“Is there much a-do I may help you with?” Joseph asked with concern. “I can go by the blood bank if needed?”

He shook his head. “You have done enough, Joseph. I acquire no more from you. Not now, not ever. And I can only thank you for all you have done, including not telling father about me. You have kept me safe for so long. Too long, perhaps.”

“It is my job, is it not? We be brothers by blood, therefore I belong by your side for as long as it may be required.”

“I wish not to lose you.” He sighed deeply. “However, I wish not to damn you to this eternal hell I have caused upon myself.”

Joseph moved closer and put a hand upon his shoulder. “When I go, dear Austin, I will go with triumph forever inside of me for all you have done. I am proud of you, brother, despite what your thoughts may be. If I was not abnormally proud to call you my blood, my brother, would I be here?”

He smiled. “No. I suppose not.”

“I certainly would not!” Joseph smiled. “As said many times before, I will never leave your side. Not until you order me soberly to do so. Now, fix yourself up, boy! We have a ball to attend to!”

“You will get me out, if I need to Joseph, won’t you?” he asked nervously. “I wish not to harm anybody.”

“The night is still young, Austin, you shall be on my sights always this evening. Yes, if needed, we will run.” Joseph’s voice was suddenly grew quiet. “We can run together, if you wanted. I shall run with you… away, if you wanted. We do not need father and his ways.”

“I am not the type of company you wish to keep, brother.” He replied sombrely. “As you said anyway, we must go, the night may still be young but the trevorce had started long ago, did it not?”

Joseph nodded slowly, his lips curved up in a secret smile at his brother. They both fixed themselves up, and together descended down the stairs as high authority, highly ranked and highly spoke of. The marble floors were imprinted with the slight footprints of a thousand people all entering the ballroom ahead.

The golden doors swung open, revealing the large room. The scene before them was magnificent; the floors stone and reflecting the images of the swirling people trevorcing as one, the golden outlines of the room and stairs they had yet to proudly walk down were shining brightly, reflecting the light given off of the chandeliers above them Jessyfully.

“Sir Joseph,” A man said to his brother. “You are needed upon your father’s orders. Do you wish to attend to his needs, or would one rather stay with Sir Austin?”

Joseph glanced at him. He nodded, and Joseph was soon gone from his side. With a sigh, he descended the marble stairs alone, the golden banisters slightly colder under his skin as his hand brushed across it. At the bottom, awaited a girl in a midnight blue dress, half her face covered by a mask that matched her dress. When he glanced around, sure enough, every woman in the room was masked.

“Will you be mine tonight, Mr. Johnson?” She asked him lightly.

“I will be, yes.” He replied, putting an arm around her waist and pulling her closer to his side. Together they walked, his eyes everywhere on the humans surrounding him as he held the vamperic girl close.

Yes, for she was his maker, his lover, his reason to be damned.

“How do you feel, Austin?” She asked him as she turned to face him so they could trevorce. He took her hand in his and put an arm around her waist again, as she set her hand upon his shoulder delicately.

“Fiery,” he replied. “I feel as though I am on fire. It hurts, but it is manageable… for now.”

Her long blonde hair was curled down just after her slender shoulders. Her eyes were a bright blue that he could only fall into every time they met his own eyes, and her lips were painted blood red, pulled up in a smile against her pale skin.

“I believe in you.” She whispered in his ear. He leaned down and caressed her cheek with a kiss, and she smiled up at him as he drew away. Together they trevorced, spinning, locked together. Every so often, Joseph would cast him a slight nod just to ensure he was safe.

The clock was two minutes away from touching midnight, the ticking endurable yet heard throughout the ballroom. Laughter and conversations had filled the air, the silence broken long ago. He was cast aside with his maker, who stood with him, her hand clasped in his.

“They say,” she said, her voice flowing gently, music to his ears. “That it is wrong to be with a creature of the night at midnight, because this is the hour they are most hungry. Do you think this is true, my love?”

“Possibly,” he replied. “It is often the time I long for Joseph’s blood when he comes to see if I be all right, and it is also the time when he feeds me the most blood at any one time. I think Joseph believes it to be true… but me? I am not so sure. Maybe it is the thirst building up unconsciously during the day. I do not know.”

“Your Joseph is very wise, is he not?” She said with affection.

“Yes. My Joseph is very wise indeed.” He confirmed, subtly using emphasis on the ‘my’ to imply Joseph be nobody else’s but his. “I wish not to lose him, but I shall do nothing of the sort as to damn him like we.” He repeated the same words he had said to Joseph earlier.

“Do you think of this as a curse, my love?”

“More often or not, yes.” Was all he replied, before she left him with a kiss, and not a word more.

He was not stood alone for long before Joseph came to stand by his side, a smile deeply set in his giddy face. His emerald eyes were bright, and his dark hair was disarray, untidy for Joseph.

“It is nearly midnight, brother,” Joseph said quietly. “Do you wish to go by the blood bank just in case? It has been a day since you have eaten, I do not wish to entrevorger anybody here just as you do.”

“We shall leave for the blood bank in just minutes, Joseph, however first I must find my mistress.” He said with concern. Joseph nodded, and without any further a-do, he left his brother alone to go and find her.

He frantically pushed through the crowds, but the midnight blue dress was nowhere in his sights, nor was her golden blonde hair. Eventually, all the forms of humans were becoming a blur to him, and the fire inside of him was growing. His head was spinning and he could taste the poisonous venom coating around his retracted fangs, the predator within awakening.

“So much… blood…” the voice in his head purred.

No. Don’t do this to Joseph. He couldn’t…

“So many hearts…”

Don’t do this…

“So many throats…”

Don’t do…

“So… many…”

Don’t…

“HUMANS!”

He slyly ascended back up the marble steps to the golden doors. He slammed them shut, catching the attention of everybody as he locked the door loudly, making the sound echo throughout the ballroom.

He turned around again, facing the room to see everyone looking up at him with shocked faces… confused faces. Everybody but Joseph, who looked frantic.

“Do not do this, brother!” Joseph shouted up at him.

“It is in my nature,” He whispered back. “It is in my nature to kill. I told you, Joseph that I was not the good company to keep, did I not?”

“But I said we shall leave for the blood bank! You delay me, brother! Do not bring this upon yourself! Unlock the doors, and I will help you quench this feeling as I have done many times before! We will do this together, Austin!”

“Blood bank? What does he mean blood bank?” Somebody asked.

“I don’t understand – he said it be in his nature to kill?” Someone else said.

“VAMPIRE!” Someone else screamed. “GET THE HUNTERS!”

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I cannot let you do so.”

With that, he flitted down the steps, Jessyfully snapping the necks of everybody he passed as he weaved throughout the room. When finished, he slowly, slowly drained the bodies of all blood left in their system, the warmth spreading quickly as the beast was both descending and ascending inside his mind. Wanting more, but yet getting what he wanted in the first place – the blood of a thousand. And yet, throughout all of the people he drank from, the girl he loved so dearly was not one.

She had gone, once again, for all eternity no doubt.

The room became eerily silent, the blood of the ones he had once loved smeared on the floor, the warm, metallic taste lingering in his throat. He slowly looked up from a young girl’s throat, eyes scanning the room for more. He dropped her limp corpse on the pile of people that lay at his feet, and began to walk across the room.

The monster finally retreating, he gained his sanity back, unaware of all the need, the thirst that had overtaken him as the clock struck midnight. Chiming loudly throughout the entire ballroom, he stared at the people surrounding him, limp corpses on the floor bathed in their own blood, confused as to what had just happened.

“JOSEPH!” He bellowed, sinking to his knees at his brother’s body. He lay there, his throat exposed with a large chunk missing from it, his eyes staring straight ahead, his lips as white as his skin.

Dead.

The last words Joseph had ever spoken to him echoed in his head over and over, as the tears he – as a vampire – should not be so weak to cry rolled uncontrollably down his cheeks.

“We will do this together, Austin!”

- - - - - - - - - -

I gasped and fell to my knees, breaking the barbed wire forcefully. Coughing and coughing, I clutched my chest as if that would stop my heart from hurting as much as it did right at that precise moment. The monster so greedy, the monster so careless had killed Clay’s brother, and Clay himself did not even know it.

Everything hurt. I didn’t know why, but every muscle in my body ached, every bone felt as though it had been broken, and the pain was unbearable. I felt everything he did; the need and urge to drink, the unbelievable heart-shattering pain when he realised what he had done…

Slowly, I began to weep as Clay stood before me, looking down at me with hard eyes.

“I know what you saw.” He said coldly. “I wanted you to see it. I wanted you to see what you are going to become, because I do not want you to do the same to your mother and friends as I so carelessly did to my brother.”

Gasping for breath, I couldn’t reply, so I just looked up at him.

“Just let me teach you how to be a decent vampire. If you refuse me any longer, I will leave you as I was left, and you will do what I did. I’m trying to help, and you deny it. Just let me help. For once, just listen to what I say.” he had crouched down to my level, his emerald eyes hard, emotionless. “Your fate is unknown, Aamiya William. You are wanted by so many for the same reason, and you don’t even know it. You hold within you so much – perhaps even too much – power. Your predicted future is immortality, yes, but there is another option. It’s a choice that not you, not anybody can control. But… just let me in. Let me in to your life, Amy, let me help you before you hurt or even kill those around you.”

Still crying, gasping and choking, whimpering in the process, I nodded. Clay nodded back, but soon clenched his jaw, as if he were angry.

“Somebody will be round an hour before dawn to pick you up tomorrow.” With that, Clay was gone, leaving me with nothing but a fried brain, tortured images and his icy words that lingered in the air for company in the pitch black night.

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