Endearment is not a gamble

Chapter - 7

“Today, would be fantastic!” Clay said in a suddenly cold tone. He thrust me towards his friend, and I stumbled into his chest. I stiffened at the same time as he did, but before I could even comprehend a step away, he had already grabbed my hand and was pulling me as gently as possible out of my own home. The vampire shoved me in the backseat of his BMW, slamming the door once I’d fallen onto the seat. I felt the car shake a little as he climbed into the driver’s seat, and I listened to his door shutting, too, and it’s mellow echo inside my head, insanity creeping through the cracks between my stability.

Breathing heavily, I put my seatbelt on, and sat there, unsure of what to do or say. I couldn’t tell them to f**k off because a) they’d just saved my life, and b) I had said to Clay I’d let him… “train” me. I had to. He was all I had when it came down to my mortality, really.

A gut-wrenching, ear-splitting, blood-curdling scream shot through the air, audible to my ears crystal clearly. It made my breath catch in my throat, and my chest burn with sudden fear for what was taking place inside my home. The screams and cries echoed in the air for longer, making my brain fry and my heart pound. Unwillingly, my lips quivered as I brought my feet up on the seat, bringing my knees up to my chest, my shoes falling off in the process. I rest my head in between my knees, my eyes welling up with tears as I was forced to listen to the screams of pain, begging for help.

Isn’t it funny how in mere seconds, your whole life can just crumble to pieces?

I was a fool to ever assume he'd cared. I was a fool to ever assume that I wouldn't soon regret the day I confided in him. I was a fool to ever want a normal, quiet life like your average teen; nights filled with parties, s*x, tormenting and recklessly damaging your liver with a large dose of alcohol. Why couldn't I have a life like that? Why was I the one stuck with vampires, sick to my stomach, hatred constantly boiling up inside of me?

Why was I always the one to get it wrong? I'd been wrong when I thought Clay cared. I was wrong when I thought I could confide in Clay. Everything about me and my life was just plain... wrong. Why, oh Lord, could I not lead a life of my own; one where I introduced my mother as the true, caring woman she once was, and not the disgusting, abusive woman she was now? The one where I had a boyfriend so gorgeous, I was envied, and not some loner freak whom had gotten attacked by a psycho in the summer break. The one where I caught a tan to make boys impressed of my smooth legs, not the bleak, pale things I had now. The one where I didn't even know vampires existed...

The one where my father would be in the picture long enough to see his first grand child. I guess it was all far too much to ask for of life.

"You can't ignore me forever, you know." Clay said in a low, irritated voice. We'd been sat on a park bench, watching the world go by for about an hour now; I sat at one end, far away from him, who sat on the other end.

"Why not?" I said back. "Life is more peaceful that way."

"Well fine," he said with a sigh. "You can train yourself to be a great vampire after you've killed everyone in your family, screwed all of your friends and sucked them dry. Drop me a text when you handle that one, and give me some tips, yeah?"

I just snorted at him; did he think reverse-psychology was going to work on me? The master of reverse-psychology? I don't think so.

He was suddenly in front of me, one hand on the seat next to me, the other on the arm rest. He was glaring, seemingly fuming.

"Look princess," he spat. "I didn't have anyone to help me when I first got turned, she... the girl, she just LEFT! You've got someone to help you through this, so why the hell are you ignoring it? Do you know what happens when you ignore this s**t, princess? Well? Do you?"

I shook my head, slightly worried to utter a word as he was in such an angry state. His emerald green eyes were ablaze - he was furious, and he wasn't hiding it. His dark hair began to flop over them though, and I inwardly breathed a sigh of relief that I wouldn't have to stare into them any longer; though stunning as they may be, the fiery rage inside them made me want to cry.

"You kill everyone you know," he said lowly. "You just go ahead, and you kill the lot of them - family, friends, anyone. Trust me, you don't want that, because afterwards, when you get your mind back, you feel the most uncontrollable pain ever, because princess... you've killed everyone who's once loved you, you've killed everyone who ever gave a s**t. I'm trying to help you not do what I did! So stop being a f*****g baby, and talk to me!"

I swallowed.

He killed his family and friends?

"Do you want me to apologise for you being a monster?" I whispered. I didn't mean to, it just came out. He clenched his jaw, and collapsed into the seat next to me.

"I guess I deserved that one." He said, almost to himself.

"You got that straight," I mumbled. "So anyway, can I go home now?"

He raised his eyebrows at me. "You want to go back there? Where you have an abusive mum? And drug dealers chasing and hunting you both down, like that man?"

"You didn't care earlier, so why care now?" I hissed. "I don't need you to always come and save me, you know."

I felt him shift, and heard him sigh.

"Why were you even at my house?" I continued. "Did you turn into some crazy-ass stalker, or what?"

"I... I came to put you out of your misery," he murmured, his voice barely audible. "I came to complete your vamperic transformation."

"Why?"

"I thought it'd be... easier."

"For who? Me or you?" I felt slightly irritated at him, now.

"Not for us." He said stubbornly. "For them."

"Who're 'them'?" I asked eagerly, turning on the bench to look at him properly, knowing my sentence didn't actually make sense, but oh well. A question is a question, right?

"Never mind," he said, his voice suddenly acidic. "You wouldn't understand anyway with your bleak little human mind."

"Clay, just because I'm a human, it doesn't mean I'm dumb. Besides, I'm not all human anymore, am I?"

"You're dumb when it comes to vampires, clearly." He insulted.

I sighed, shaking my head with annoyance. I stood up, and walked down the concrete path that split two halves of the fields, wandering aimlessly in the direction I thought was home. I glanced back over my shoulder, and he was still sat on the bench, watching me go. I saw the other vampires emerge from the trees, heading straight towards him, but when I looked back at the bench, he was gone. I looked back at the trees... they were all gone.

I walked a little faster, having no reason to linger.

To be perfectly honest, I had to get it into my head that he wasn't always going to be around to save me, like he did when that druggie came to the door. He wasn't always going to be around in general... because eventually, when the training was done and I did his little favour, he would leave me and I him, growing distinctively separate from each other, leading different eternities.

My house finally came into view, and it seemed as though nothing had changed. Slowly, I walked up the driveway, hopped onto the porch and pushed the door open hesitantly...

Slamming it shut, I caught the stench of... yes, you guessed it right, tobacco. My mum was home, at the least. I could hear a man's voice grumbling a laugh from in the living room.

"Mum, oh good, you're in," I said sarcastically. "A little one of your friends came over earlier. Tried to kill me. You know, because you owe him money for all the drugs he sells you."

Yes, she was sat in the living room with a man. That man was sat in my father's chair. Hate boiled deep inside me... far worse then the hate I felt for Clay. So, so much worse... I wonder what would happen if I just ripped his throat out.

Wait, did I honestly just think that?

"Oh, that's nice sweetie." Mum mumbled, lighting up another death-stick.

"Are you even listening?" I growled. "And who the f**k is he, and why's he sitting in my dad's chair?"

"I'm Christian," he said with a smile.

"Great, I think you should leave now." I said pointedly.

"But your mother and I were just playing an adult game-,"

"Mate, I'm sixteen, not five. I don't care if you want to screw my mum, just get the f**k outta my house!" I snapped, glaring at him.

My mother didn't say a word, merely sat there, dragging her cigarette for a long time, staring out the window. Hesitantly, her man-w***e friend got up, and I waited for the front door to slam, before walking off.

Once upstairs, I went straight into the bathroom, locking the door and turning to face the mirror. My image was tensed and uneasy; my blonde hair was greasily pulled back into a ponytail, strands of hair escaping here and there. My blue eyes seemed to be pushing on grey, and my skin had an ashen tone to it.

I wearily walked over to the bath, and began to fill it up, thinking of all the good it'd do... but it wasn't as good as to erase the disgusting vampire from inside me. The monster, the bloodsucker that I'd soon become. The exact thing I hated.

After a few minutes, I walked to the now-full bath, and turned off the taps.

Stripping off all of my clothes, I climbed into the bath and lay there, my mind absently flicking through memories. After a little while, I reached up to my neck and traced the indents of puncture wounds on my throat that were barely there anymore.

Though barely, but they were still there.

I sighed, and let my hand fall.

Shutting my eyes and taking a deep breath in, I slowly lowered myself into the water, letting the thick darkness consume me as a fiery burning scratched at my lungs.

Alas, the world was plunged into a peaceful silence once more.

I woke abruptly the next morning, without my alarm to help. Yesterday’s events traced in my head, and how I’d managed to shut the world out for three hours, after falling gratefully unconscious in the bath. To my great disappointment, something – yes, something, not someone – had woken me from my “slumber”. I woke, however, as if awaking from a sleep when someone had made a noise. Not as if someone had pried me from the water and performed CPR on me. This troubled me: that I was perfectly fine after what should have been my accidental watery grave, but I stored it at the back of my mind for later thoughts.

Glancing at my clock, I noticed I was an hour late for college. I scrambled out of bed and threw the first thing I saw on, and plunged into my car, darting to college. My head was thumping with pain when I opened the classroom door, and my teacher wasn’t about to make it any better, I was sure.

“Ah, Miss William! You finally decided to Jessy us with your presence,” Miss Jones said, slightly annoyed. “Take your seat at the back and be quiet.”

Sighing, I skimmed my way through the desks, coming to a stop at my usual desk. Only to see someone sat in my seat. A boy, in fact. He had golden-blonde hair that was cropped short and scruffy, the most amazing sea-blue eyes. His skin was slightly tanned, a slight smile on his lips as he beamed up at me.

“Am I in your seat?” he mumbled, grabbing his things.

“It’s fine, I’ll find somewhere else to sit,” I smiled, and he shrugged, leaving his things. I took the empty desk next to him, wedged in between he and Clay. Clay was shooting the boy an evil look, but I just rolled my eyes. If Clay wanted my attention after yesterday, then he’d have to grovel for it. Calling me dumb…

“I’m Noah,” the boy smiled as the class all started talking, getting on with their work. I cast him a sideways glance to see him sat facing me, his hand outstretched. I took it, smiling.

“I’m Amy,” I said. “What’re we doing, by the way? The task, I mean.”

“Er, a project about the Revolutionary War, you know, that one where the Americans wanted the right to be independent from Britain?”

“Oh,” I mumbled, scanning through my knowledge of history. “Thanks… You wanna work with me for it?” Sure, I suppose I was flirting a bit – but it was only for fun; it wouldn’t work anyways; I was to become a vampire soon, right? I could at least make the most of this happy feeling without wanting to suck his blood while I had the chance. Noah’s face lit up, and he nodded, wedging his desk against mine.

“So…where did you move from, Noah?” I asked him a little while later.

He looked up from his work and said, “Kent. Nice place, I suppose… I came to live with my dad here, though.”

“Ah, I see,” I smiled. At the sound of a sigh and continuous tapping, I turned to graze my eyes across the room, scanning for the perpetrator for this annoying sound. My eyes fell upon Clay sat on my right side, the gap between us distinct. He had a blank piece of paper in front of him, and he was tapping his pen angrily, quickly on his desk. Almost as if he knew I were looking at him, his eyes slid up to meet mine.

Abruptly, my head soothed as though someone had rubbed ice inside it, cooling the fiery headache. With relief, I relaxed a little, but my eyes never left Clay’s. He held the gaze for a little while longer, before narrowing his eyes in a glare, and turning away. Annoyed at him again all of a sudden, I looked away too, my headache roaring up again.

Well, sorry, but I’m not the one who expected everyone to fall at my feet. Sorry, but I’m not the one who insults another’s intelligence by their race (meaning vampire-human type things). He is, not me. So… I’ve done nothing wrong.

I’m not to blame for this hiccup he had caused.

“Who’s he?” Noah asked, his eyes following mine to Clay.

I shrugged. “Some guy,” as I said this, I saw Clay’s head snap to my direction, his face expressionless out of the corner of my eye. I bit my tongue, swallowing the smirk that was so desperate to appear on my face.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Ugh. The sound of that new kid’s voice is doing my head in… what a complete and utter suck up. No better choice of words; that’s it, worm your way in with the vampire. She’ll only suck you dry sooner or later, my friend. In fact, the new toy… I mean boy’s voice annoyed me so much, I consciously started tapping. Screw work; I mean, hello, I was there when the Revolutionary War was going on. Who knew more about it then me? I felt princess’s gaze, -so I looked at her.

After holding her gaze, my face twisted into a glare. She really was too stupid to understand, and she thought I was making a judgemental contradiction yesterday. Heck, this just proves how dumb the human mind was – she didn’t even know what I was implying. Who knew the Homo Sapiens (A/N: this is the early evolutionary stage for humans) could evolve to be such a moronic, dumbfounded, idiotic race? Not me, that’s for sure – that’s why I like to turn girls by the dozen, if I can. Though, recently, I haven’t bothered.

Why, you ask? I mean, there’s some sick killer on the loose. And for once, it’s not me! I don’t like the idea of another vampire in town – they could expose me, and that was the main threat. I’d begun building a life here secretly, only recently joining this stupid college to keep an eye on princess, in case she went crazy. To be exposed… that was something not even Gabe would be able to erase from human history. My little plan that princess didn’t understand just yet was I was turning some girls who had made a deal with me – to do a favour for me if I let them live. I was going to keep doing that until I had enough new-borns to raise an army, together we’ll rise and wipe out the vampire in town and the vampire hunters. Next on my list would be to wipe out the entire city of Southampton, including the humans in it.

I’d sink this city to it’s grubby little knees. I was going to end this place, and I’d do it with great pleasure, after everything that had served in this city…

It was mine for the taking.

But… it wasn’t as simple as that. My plan wasn’t working. The girls I’d turned had already perished to their fiery deaths because of my… curse. To them, it counted as a sign of affection, so they burned, leaving me as empty handed as when I’d started. That wasn’t the hardest part, though.

No, for the hardest part was having to bite the bullet and try and make Amy like us instead of them. The fate of our world rested on her shoulders, and it was my responsibility to make sure she was safe from harm.

Even those that seem good turn out bad…

“Who’s he?” the toy… I mean boy, said to her.

“Some guy,” she said back carelessly. Unwillingly, my head snapped to her direction; okay, she might not understand my way of life, but did she honestly just throw me off like that?!

I don’t think that was very fair; no I don’t. I was also getting rather bored of keeping up this ‘normal human boy’ act – it was boring. Enough talk, more action. I’m a vampire, I wasn’t blood, s*x and money. I want this town to end, and I want the humans to go with it. I want my race to remain back to peace, how we were before the humans and rogues interfered.

Also, Amy will get nowhere if we sit around waiting for her to give into my irresistible charm. Not that I’d even tried it on her, but eventually, she’d have to give into immortality… whether that was the easier way and excepting it, or the harder, more painful way: your mind collapsing in on you until you evidently go insane. That’s what happened to me. Look where I found myself… in a house that was once alive, every single last person sucked dry, dead. Family, friends, the lot. Every single last one… dead and gone forever. At my hands. I hated myself for it, and I still did, even if they didn’t care for me whatsoever in my human life.

After a little while though, you begin to become more careless about those you kill. I know now, that I’m damned to watching those around me grow old, get married, have children, while I was frozen in time. I wanted so badly to live the life all those humans around me could, and would, lead. Instead I was cursed to immortality, and to an eternity with no love.

But… Amy was different to the other girls. She was so, so much more different. She didn’t respect me at all, she hated me, I was sure of it. She was just weirdly strange, and it made me want to tell her…

I found myself wanting to tell her everything.

But… even to my own soul, I had to lock away the dark secrets in little black boxes, storing them at the back of my mind. Things I couldn’t even think about, let alone admit to her. The dark secrets, however, would remain in the black boxes at the back of my mind forever more, until the time was right.

They’d only break both Amy and I.

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