Surrendering To The Ravishing Sins

chapter-4 "Eyes on the unknown".

"Come on, you have to go to the doctor," Lyra said to Sofi.

After a while, Sofi sat up, and Lyra helped her stand. The two of them walked out of the infirmary together.

"Where's Amelia?"

"Call her…

We'll all go together."

"Then we should wait for her outside the university. She'll be here soon," Lyra said.

Hearing her words, I nodded and held her hand for support. We both stepped outside, and I started looking around.

My mind still refused to accept that what I saw while unconscious wasn't real. It's strange… none of it could possibly be true, yet what I felt, what I saw—didn't feel like a lie either.

How am I supposed to calm the storm inside me?

"You know, Sofi," Lyra said, placing a hand on my shoulder, making me look at her.

"I want to take you and Amelia on a vacation with me.

What's the point of going without you two? And honestly, you both will get bored staying here anyway."

I looked at her, thought for a moment, then said,

"But can we really afford any vacation right now? Lyra, I think we still need to work a bit more.

We can't start thinking about enjoying life just yet…"

"I knew you wouldn't say yes…" Lyra said with a slight smile.

"I know that if we go on a vacation right now, it might end up costing a lot… and it probably will. But I really think we need a break. Even if we don't go on a vacation, let's at least have a rest properly."

"We'll enjoy the whole day… and it'll give us a little break from this hectic environment too."

"If you're really craving it that much, then we'll go somewhere..."

I said, looking at Lyra with a smile.

Just then, Amelia arrived and hugged me tightly.

"Ah, thank God you're okay...

I won't say anything else right now… just seeing you like this is enough for me," Amelia said softly.

"Hmm, I don't want to say anything either about what happened..."

Lyra told me that the doctor—

"Yeah," Amelia immediately said,

"You have to go meet the doctor. She told us herself, and we even know where her hospital is. Come on, let's go."

The three of us walked out together and got into a taxi. I sat in the backseat with Amelia, while Lyra took the passenger seat next to the driver.

I took a deep breath.

I really didn't feel like meeting the doctor…

Especially if she starts asking about my past or stress-related questions—things I don't want to share.

How am I supposed to handle all this?

I bit my lip, lost in thought.

If I hadn't fainted in the cafeteria, none of this would've happened.

What a mess—

I already don't understand what's going on in my life, and now there's this new problem: I have to face the doctor too.

God, I just wish this traffic never ends today.

I bit my lip once again, thinking to myself. My hands were already sweaty. I kept staring out the window, trying to calm myself down.

I was getting bored sitting in the taxi with Lyra and Amelia.

Crossing my arms, I said,

"It would've been better if you both had just let me rest in the hostel room.

At least I would be sleeping. I'm already sick, and now with this traffic, it feels like I'm going to throw up any minute."

"Then sleep, just close your eyes," Amelia said, looking at me.

"We'll wake you up once we reach the hospital," Lyra added.

"As if it's so easy for a sick person to sleep in this horrible traffic noise," I said again, still looking out the window.

I sipped a little water, trying to control the wave of nausea building up… meanwhile the same moment—

My eyes noticed a car going ahead..The BMW..

And I can't look away as it disappeared from my sight..

FLASHBACK..

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In the car next to ours… the one right in front of it, actually—its window was rolled down.

Someone had rested their hand outside on the window. I caught a glimpse of his face in the wing mirror—

a man wearing sunglasses, eyes fixed straight ahead, also waiting for the light to turn green. He was wearing a black shirt, sleeves rolled up to the elbows, his veins visible.

The watch on his wrist—

It was that hand… that caught my attention. I kept staring. But his face wasn't clearly visible.

Unconsciously, I shifted in my seat, loosening my seatbelt. I leaned my head out the window, trying to get a better look at the man sitting in the car ahead of the one beside us.

Trying—desperately—to see his face.

Shit… am I some kind of creep? I thought to myself.

But still… I have to see this man's face.

I couldn't help it.

The thought buzzed in my head as I leaned just a little more, trying once again to catch a proper glimpse of him.

While I'm doing all this, I just hope no one notices me… I thought.

Maybe Amelia did, but she didn't pay much attention. Lyra hadn't noticed anything—yet.

God, I just wish I could see his face before all the cars start moving…

But of course not. When has my luck ever been that good?

The light turned green. One by one, the cars began moving forward.

That man… he drove his car ahead.

Frustrated, I hit the seat beside me with my hand.

His car is leaving!

I screamed internally, teeth clenched.

I wanted to see him… just once.

I threw a quick, slightly guilty glance at the taxi driver who had now started our car too, and we were moving forward. But the BMW was already a few cars ahead.

End of flashback.

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My eyes followed that BMW as it disappeared into the traffic.

That man… his hands, his presence—

But I never saw his face.

Maybe I am a creep. Yeah, probably. But still—I just wanted to see him once. Just once.

But now what?

Now… nothing. There's nothing I can do.

My mood dropped even further.

I stayed quiet for the rest of the ride, not saying a word.

As the taxi kept moving forward, my mind stayed stuck in that one moment… in that stupid traffic.

What does he even look like?

That's all I've been thinking about since then.

Lost in my thoughts, I hadn't even realized we'd reached the hospital.

I opened the door on my side and stepped out of the taxi. Lyra held my hand to help me stand properly.

After paying the fare, we headed inside.

Amelia was already at the reception, speaking with someone.

We were told to wait.

Now, we're sitting outside Dr. Luna's office, waiting for her.

She's probably still with another patient inside.

"Hello... doc."

"Yes, Miss Sofia, come in, have a seat. So, how are you feeling since you regained consciousness?"

"I'm fine. Actually, I feel completely okay now."

"Really?"

"You know, your fainting episode wasn't just a normal fainting spell."

"What do you mean?"

"I have a feeling, Sofia, that you're under stress… but stress alone may not be the full reason.

The reason I asked you to come in was to talk to you—so I can understand what's really going on.

I do have a bit of an idea, but unless you talk to me, how can I be sure about your condition?"

"Do you have past trauma, Sofia?"

"Yeah… a little."

"I mean… my parents, they're not around… so I miss them."

"How much do you miss them?

And… do you remember the moments you had with them?"

"I don't have any memories with them…

I've just seen their pictures… in an album…"

"They passed away…" I said while looking down.

"I'm sorry to hear that, Sofia.

So you've never seen your parents except in pictures?

Did they die shortly after you were born?"

I looked at the doctor, my mind flooding with a hundred thoughts. Then I said quietly,

"Yes… they weren't there… they died in an accident not long after I was born."

"Sofia, I know you used to live in an orphanage, but I also believe you couldn't have been completely alone.

There must have been someone else in your family besides your parents…

Was it them who sent you to the orphanage?"

"No… there was no one… I was very little when I came to the orphanage.

As I grew older, the people there told me that my parents had died in an accident… and that I had no one else."

"As far as I can think, after my parents' death, someone who had seen their bodies, maybe even the police ,

must have put me in the orphanage so that I could survive…"

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So doctor?

According to you, what illness do I have? What should I do?

Dr. Luna looked at me and said, "You have hypothermia.

Your body temperature had dropped when you were unconscious, and your body was also stiffening... these are symptoms of hypothermia."

"I've prepared your report, Sofia...

It includes everything — from the medication to the steps you need to follow.

You'll have to keep meeting me during your treatment...

If you don't come—

your condition could get worse."

I nodded... "Okay, I understand."

"Alright then, my nurse is inside — you'll have to get a few simple tests done.

Then you can go, Sofia," Dr. Luna said.

I got up and went for the tests.

A while later, I came out with the reports in my hand.

"So, Sofi? Everything went fine?" Lyra asked.

"Shall we go get the medicine now? Or is something still left?"

"Yeah, everything's fine," I replied.

"What illness do you have?" Amelia asked.

"Hypothermia…" I answered.

"Guys, I'm going to get the medicine. You both go outside and book a taxi, I'll be there in a bit… I just really want to reach the hostel quickly and rest."

"Okay, we'll also grab something to eat. You should have some juice too," Amelia said.

"But… will you be able to walk alone, Sofi?"

"Yeah… I'm fine now. You guys go ahead, I'll be there in a minute."

"Excuse me," I cleared my throat.

Saying again, "Excuse me...?"

I placed the reports on the counter and said,

"Can you give me these medicines?"

The guy who noticed me nodded in agreement and took the file from my hand.

"'Can you give me'—what was that, Elina??

Of course, they'll give it to me!"

Why can't I just talk normally and properly?

I sighed deeply, frustrated with myself.

After waiting a little while, I saw the guy who had taken my file.

He had taken out my medicines and was now getting the bill made.

I waited patiently.

He handed my file back to me and turned to help the others with their medicines.

My eyes stayed fixed on my medicines, the bill was being prepared…

Then someone else handed me the bill along with a bag of medicines.

"Thank you… I'll just pay now," I said, taking out my wallet and making the payment.

"Thank you," I said once more when a correction was made to the bill, and I turned to leave.

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