His little secret, my sweet sin

CHAPTER5

~MaryJane’s POV~

They say friends are the most precious gift. Friendship, the hardest thing in the world to analyze and explain. Just as hard as explaining how Calista, my best friend, had been my anchor in my hardest moments better than ‘the family’ could ever be.

“Friends stick closer than brothers” I'd once scoffed, dismissing the sentiment as melodramatic but in the face of my loss, my Calista was my shield, my hope in the storm of misery that had engulfed my life.

Weeks after the funeral…..

“I can't live like this C, I don't know how to live like this” I confessed, my voice trembling while fighting off tears that would never drop. It was like my tear duct had gone desert dry.

“I feel like I lost a huge part of me like my heart was ripped to shreds”. Calista took my hand, her eyes welled up with tears. “Oh MJ, I know baby, I know”. She held me close and I had never felt more in need of warmth like I did there and then.

After a long silence wrapped up in her comforting embrace, I looked up at her, my eyes searching her face for every inkling of a reaction or an emotion. “I've been thinking,” I began, my voice hesitant.

“….about surrogacy. I know it’s a long shot, but it's worth a try.” Calista stiffened, pulling her hand away, “MJ you should be looking after yourself right now….” I understood her concern but I just didn't have the luxury of a big break.

“Your health, physical and mental, should be top priority right now. Not another witch hunt for Coco felons” I made a face at the last sentence.

“Witch Hunt is wild C”

“You know what I mean”. She dragged and she was right. I and Christopher weren't even granted the luxury of some time to ourselves as a couple before Mrs. Julia nearly hung me dry for a grandchild.

“Look, I know but I don't have the time anymore”. I said which attracted a raised eyebrow.

“Sounds like you are dying or some shit…” she said dryly while my countenance sank for a brief second.

"Of course not..." I chuckled dryly, "...but you know how it is with Mrs Julia".

There was another round of silence.

I sat up, I held her hands and I looked into her eyes and I told her

"I have something to ask of you C, it a huge ask, but then I have no one else to ask this of, it’s only you that I consider family”

“Uhm, okay?? Why are you being weird?”

“I don’t have a sister, and to me for the longest time you have been more than a sister, that’s why I can ask this of only you”

She held my hands too and said to me

“Ask away MJ, you know I got you always, I’d do anything for you”

“Uhm.....I want you be my surrogate?" I uttered shakingly.

"Huh? What? No! I don't think that's a good idea" she replied very quickly.

"Why? Why not?" I asked, confused.

"I can't believe you'll ask this of me, Mary Jane, I mean anyone can be your surrogate so why me?” She asked while removing her hands from mine

“I can’t have a stranger carry my baby C. But if it’s you, my best friend, my sister, my blood, my baby is your baby and your baby is my baby, please, I know how inconsiderate it might sound but please do this for me C”

"Oh my God". She held her palm up.

The last time I heard Calista speak this way was when I told her I was going to drop out of fashion school to support Christopher.

"You are asking me to pause my life here MJ do you know?" she asked me.

"I know C, I know it’s a lot but I don’t know what else to do, I have only you C. I have only you?"

"C you are my best friend, my sister, the blood of my blood. There's no other person I trust more to do this for me". I might be crazy but I meant every word.

I could see her face soften even though the disappointment from before remained.

"Carrying a child is......I'm not sure I'm ready for…. What if something goes wrong? What if.....”I reached out and took her hands in mine. "C, I know this is a lot to ask. But you are strong, you are kind, and above all, you are beautiful! What are the odds?"

Calista looked away, her eyes were a mixture of fear and compassion. “But……I don't want to put you through any more emotional stress, what if I disappoint you?”

“You won't, I know you won't,” I assured her, squeezing her hands. “I trust you, Calista. More than I trust anyone else in this world. Please….” I pouted. “Help your baby carry her baby”.

After a long almost suffocating silence, Calista finally nodded. “Alright,” she whispered, a teardrop rolling down her plump blush-filled cheek.

“I’ll do it”.

******

Now as I stood at the doorstep of my matrimonial home with a box of cupcakes in hand for the woman who agreed to help me experience motherhood again, I couldn't help but re-access the past year.

The sound of laughter spilled from within. Nothing made me happier than the reality of things going just as I planned this once but as soon as the thought crept into my head, I sent it back just as fast so I didn't jinx it.

I hesitated, my hand hovering over the door knob. The laughter was louder now and maybe joining in the fun could get me to laugh for the first time since Sky died.

I took a deep breath and turned the knob, once the door was open wide enough for me to see the interiors I was met with a surprise.

Calista stood there back turned to me with a pair of arms draped around her waist. I had lost the element of shock since Sky, all my brain does now is pick out details before my body conjures up a reaction.

I saw his wristwatch, the same one I had bought for our second anniversary together.

“Maybe it's just someone else's, surely he can't be the only one who owns that brand”. Or so my heart told me.

The giggles were ongoing and then they locked lips, tilting heads in unison as the guy in the watch brought his hands lower to grab her buttcheeks while she giggled some more like a little child.

And then, I saw him.

Christopher.

My Christopher.

I could see his taper fade and the little rock on his ears, his lips locked and intertwined with hers like a knot.

I stood frozen, the cupcakes slipping from my grasp as my blood ran cold.

Calista pulled away with a start, her smile fading as she saw the look on my face. “MJ,” she stammered, “I thought…..you….you weren't back until tomorrow”.

Christopher his face flushed with what looked like embarrassment as opposed to remorse stepped forward, “Babe I promise it's not what it looks like”.

I looked at him, then at her and I just couldn't decide who deserved the first bullet. “You both know what a rough past year I've had….” I started. “But you do this…..to me”. I whispered, my voice barely audible.

Calista scoffed. “Oh don't be dramatic, Mary Jane. This was all your idea. You asked me to do this and I'll be damned if I didn't do it the most comfortable way possible”.

“You agreed!” I cried, “I never forced any of this on you. I came to you as a friend in need and oh! I begged you C, I begged you and you agreed to put a smile on my face again and this is how you do it?”

Christopher stepped closer, his voice placating. “Babe I know we f****d up and we're sorry. Please, babe, don't make this harder than it already…..”

“f****d up?” I interrupted, my voice rising. “You have not the faintest clue what f****d up is”.

Calista’s face hardened. “Oh please spare me the theatrics. Don't you dare act like the victim, plus! It's just these messed up pregnancy hormones”. She uttered rubbing her bump with a smirk dancing at the side of her lips.

…..and just like that the trust and the bond that had sustained me through my darkest times was broken beyond repair.

“Look babe you have to understand, she's pregnant so she's the priority”. Christopher said finally.

I stole one last glare before turning on my heels to walk off when the front door was flung ajar, Beatrice walked strutting in like the living room was her runway.

“I heard….I heard about…” I looked at her, staggering as she suddenly struggled with the luggage she had in hand.

“What the f**k are you doing here?” Christopher asked from behind me.

“I popped in to see my Darling brother, am I not allowed to do that?” she paused like she forgot something.

“Or should I say…..”

“…..The father of my child?”