An Unexpected Protector

Chapter 1

Panic sears through me as I jolt awake. "What is going on?" I ask myself as I am trying to regulate my breathing. My brain felt over loaded. The pain seemed to be real but as I was sitting in my bed now, I felt no physical pain but the anxiety peaked causing me to fall head first into a panic attack. My chest tightened as I tried to control my breathing but it wasn't working. I could feel the sweat beginning to pool at the top of my nose in between my eyebrows. I could hear and feel the blood as it was pounding in my ears as my heart was thudding in my chest. I noticed my hands shaking as I gripped at my chest as I felt the oxygen being sucked from my body. "Calm down" I tell myself. "It's Okay." I could feel my feet beginning to tingle as everything went blurry as if I was looking through a fish lens. I had to try and get to the window. I needed to feel the oxygen circle around me but I was frozen in fear and things got worse instantaneously when my bedroom door flies open aggressively and slams against the wall in my bedroom.

"WHAT THE f**k IS GOING ON IN HERE?" My dad stormed into my room obviously hearing something that he didn't like.

"I had a nightmare, struggling to breathe." I signed to him hoping he would take me in his arms and hold me tight and tell me that everything was going to be okay but deep down I knew that wouldn't happen. I don't know why it shocked me when he raised his hands and brought his palm down to connect with my cheek. The pain seared through my eye and the tears that were already stinging at my eyes were now falling freely. The shock and pain of the slap brought me out of the panic attack, sure the slap hurt but knowing that your father would rather physically hurt you rather than comfort you hurt more.

"Your dream?" He questioned me aggressively. "What happened?" I had a special ability to be able dream about the future and I was useful to him that was the only reason that he kept me around. I learned from a very young age that I wasn't important to him and that my younger and prettier cousin Blair was always going to be the idolised child and I was the spare. He found out and was using me in every way he could that was beneficial for him and Blair. I remember back to the first time I took my first real beating from my dad.......

10 Years Earlier.......

I ran out of my bedroom to try and find my mummy. I wanted to scream and shout her name but I couldn't find her anywhere. I still wasn't feeling well, I had come home from the hospital 2 days earlier and was trying to get used to not being able to talk anymore. Mummy is my safe place. I can cry with Mummy, she doesn't get angry at me the way Daddy does. Ever since I had a nightmare last night it makes me feel uneasy not being able to see her. I look around the house and can't find her. My brain cannot handle that I don't know where she is. Why did I wake up from my nap so panicked and why was the need to see my mummy so strong within me. I run into our living room to find my daddy on the phone with the Orlando police department. "Yes sir" Daddy says on the phone. "I will be right there." He turns and looks at me I can see the anger rising in his eyes. He doesn't hurt me when mummy is here. I need to find mummy. "LYDIA!" he screamed at the top of his lungs. "GET YOUR ASS BACK DOWN HERE NOW!" The booming voice stops me in my tracks. I knew if I tried to hide then he would hurt me more. I walk back down the stairs with my hands shaking in fear. When I walk back in to the living room Daddy comes back into view and I don't recognise him anymore. He is standing in the corner of the room with a belt in his hand and my heart falls down to my purple sneakers that Mummy bought me when I was sick. When he speaks to me his voice is cold and there is nothing in it. "You killed your mother!" I am scared. I wanted to run and seek the safety of Mummy but I realise why I woke up afraid. As much as I want to run and hide the fear bubbling up inside of me has me locked into position.

Why is Daddy coming towards me like that? He looks like one of the tigers from the nature programmes I watch with Mummy. He looks like he is about to jump on something to eat. As I watch him it's like I have hidden within myself, I can't say or do anything but I keep watching every move he makes as he starts to slap the belt against his free hand. The sound of the belt seems so far away compared to Daddy who reaches out and grabs me by my arm. His grip is so tight that I feel like the blood has stopped going to my arms and it tingles. I can't ask him to stop. I have started sign language lessons but I haven't learned much yet. I plead as much as I can with my eyes for him to let me go. I can feel the bile rise in my throat as I realise what is about to happen. Mummy has gone and Daddy blames me. There is no one here to protect me anymore. I turn to fight and try to run away.

In one moment my heart shattered and I stopped breathing. Daddy raised the belt above his head and brought it down on top my back with the belt buckle tearing at the skin and my favourite Minnie Mouse t-shirt. My eyes start to sting with tears and the more he brings the belt down the more the tears fell. When he tired could no longer raise the belt he dropped it and began to use his fists and feet instead. With each hit that connected to my face it felt as if he was going to kill me. I could taste the coppery blood trickling down the back of my throat coming from my tongue where I had bitten it not expecting the punch. The anger inside of him was red hot and I felt it with every punch and kick that connected with my fragile body. The fire that ran through his body came out and left the burns on me. It burned hot and fast or at least I felt like it did until I let the blackness take me away.

The damage is evident on my skin and will heal but the damage to my brain and heart will never heal. My eyes were swollen over to the point I can barely see anything out of it and I could tasted the blood that was still sitting in my mouth. When I wake up I can barely move, every muscle in my body seems to have ceased up. Every time I try to move to find mummy my body struggles I can't move smoothly, every time I try it's jerky and painful. The deep purple welts are already appearing on my arms and legs and I know they are going to get deeper over time. I can't help but think the look horrible over my pale white skin. I know that I am lucky to still be breathing and I don't think I have broken any bones. As I reach up to touch my face I can feel the congealed blood on my lips and I can feel they have cracked and been cut. As I look in the mirror I am really scared because there is blood all over my face. My nose is smashed. My eyes went wide and I recoiled in pain as my bottom lip trembles. "I WANT MY MUMMY!" My heart broke and shattered into a million pieces that day as did my trust in anyone.

Current Day.......

"DID YOU NOT HEAR ME?" My dad screamed at me. "What was your dream about?" His voice was icy. I needed to be careful how I answered him because if I didn't give him an answer he liked then I was going to end up with a beating. I learned after the first day he beat me that I had to protect myself anyway I could until I was old enough to get out of here. But the day that he learned about the gift that I was mysteriously given when I fell sick was the day I kissed goodbye to ever being allowed to leave....

9 Years ago......

It's been a week since Daddy last hit me. Mummy hasn't woken up yet, she's still asleep. Daddy says it's all my fault. If I wasn't sick then she wouldn't have gone out to get medicine and she would not have been in the car for the man to hit her with. The police took the man away so why is it my fault? I want Mummy to wake up and protect me again but she doesn't. Maybe she blames me too and stays asleep so she doesn't have to see me.

The nightmares seem to have gone away, but I have really strange dreams now. It seems my dreams tell me what is going to happen. Daddy got a new job and I dreamed about that and I got everything right and Blair was in cheerleading practice and fell and broke her arm and I knew about that too. I don't tell Daddy though because I don't want him to hit me if I can't tell him what he wants to know.

I get to go back to school when I am not bruised so that's fun and scary. I make sure that I behave because if the teachers call Daddy and tell him I am naughty I am scared that I will be hit again and I don't like being hit. It hurts. Daddy says if I behave then I can go to school and see Mummy at the place that is not a hospital but they look after her.

I rush home from school to start cleaning the way Daddy likes. If I don't do it and have dinner cooked by the time he gets home I get sent to bed without any dinner. I get so hungry sometimes my belly hurts. I used to hide bread in my room so that if it did happen then I could eat that but Blair told on me and I got beaten again.

Blair gets everything she wants and Daddy spoils her. I get jealous but I try not to cry. If I cry Daddy gets angry and then I get hit again. I only have one thing that I hide now and that is my diaries that I hide under my bed. They have all of my dreams in them, I can't tell anyone. They will tell on me and I will have to tell Daddy things and I don't want to.

"LYDIA!!!!" I feel sick as I hear Daddy shouting my name in anger from upstairs. I look at the clock in the kitchen he is home early from work.

"What did I do?" I ask myself. You were at school, you did all your homework, you didn't borrow anything from Blair without asking. I get frustrated at trying to think what I possibly could have done. I run upstairs as fast as I can. When I reach my bedroom I see all of my diaries scattered across the floor. Daddy is sat on my bed with something in his hand that is shiny.

"What is this?" He asks me. My body shivers as the monster appears to tell me that I am going to get hurt again. Blair is stood in the corner of my room with a smirk on her face. I want to like Blair but every time I try to she does something that makes me hate her.

"Diaries" I sign to him trying to figure out a way that he won't hurt me.

"Why do you need to keep diaries of our lives and document everything that happens in them?" The way he speaks makes me terrified. But the fear is my challenge and the only way out of this is for my brain to function and try to work how to get out of this. "Hold on!" My stomach sinks like a big anchor I learned about in school. "These are dated before all of this happened!" Oh no I tell myself this is bad. "How did you know this before it happened?" He looked at me.

"I had a dream." I told him. I gave up any hope of keeping it from him. I have to stay alive until Mummy wakes up. I can then tell her I am sorry and I don't want to stay here anymore.

"If you tell me the truth" He tells me but he tells me like it's a threat. "I won't beat you; you can go to bed without any dinner!" He shouts.

"Daddy, I had dreams." I told him again. "Then a couple of days later it all happened." I should have known he would lie to me because I only remember being hit by the shiny thing in his hand once before waking up next to Mummy.

Current Day.....

"I was giving birth to a child....." I signed scared to tell him the rest because the person I dreamed about as the father of my child was the man that Blair had been admiring since we were in Sophomore Year of high school. I don't remember him showing any interest in her but she always had to get everything she wanted. No matter the consequences.

"HA!" My father laughed as he looked at me. "No one is going to be interested in a mute like you." He told me. "Unless....." The realisation spread across his face. "Who is the father?" He asked me.

"I don't know" I answered. Although Blair mentioned Hunter Matthews to me in my dream I didn't know he was the father.

"You know something else!" He screamed at me.

"Blair was in the room telling me that my baby was her baby and the Matthews were expecting the child." He looked at me with disgust on his face. When he started shouting at me, the fear would cause me just to blurt out the truth. I had been in hospital numerous times over the years from the beatings I took from him and he always managed to blame someone else. Once it was the kids from school who bullied me because I couldn't speak, then it was I was clumsy from the illness that took my voice and the latest was I don't pay attention to what I am doing and get myself into mischief. The police officers and social workers would always believe it because they looked at Blair who was perfect and I wasn't.

"Hunter Matthews would never be interested in a defective, overweight and ugly girl like you." He laughed. "He would date someone like Blair who is tall, gorgeous and famous. Unless there was a reason you had to have her child." He was pacing around my room now trying to figure out the reason that I was having these dreams. "DID YOU GIVE BIRTH SUCCESSFULLY?" He screamed at me.

"Uncle D!" The sleepy voice ventured from outside. "What is happening?"

"Oh sweetheart." He said calmly and softly. The way he spoke to her made me envious. This was my father and he spoke to someone else as if she was his daughter. "I am sorry did I wake you?"

"Yes, it's okay" She looked at me, probably with fear in my eyes and cast her eyes back towards my dad. "What has SHE done now?"

"Nothing baby girl." He told her stroking her hair to try and calm her down. "She had another dream and I am just trying to work out why she had it."

"Well, tell me what she dreamt about?" After explaining the situation to her she became outraged. "LYDIA STOP DAYDREAMING YOU ABSOULTE MONSTER" She screamed. "HE WILL NEVER KNOW WHO YOU ARE OR THAT WE ARE RELATED!" The anger that surged through me was immediate. What gave her belief that she was anyway better than me? "WHY WOULD I NEED HER TO GIVE BIRTH TO HUNTER'S BABY?" She screamed. She was belligerent. "I AM THE ONE WHO WILL MARRY HUNTER NOT HER!" She closed the distance and went to slap me across the face. I caught her hand before it made contact which was a mistake. I knew I was going to regret that sooner rather than later. My dad was across my room in what seems like one step and brought his closed fist down onto my cheek. The punch connects and the swelling is instantaneous. My head jolts backwards and I hit my head off of the wall behind me. The hit came a lot quicker and harder than I had expected. I could feel my eyes lose focus and I know that my pupils would have turned to pin pricks, I could feel the tell-tale bile rising in my stomach with my mouth watering, I have to swallow the chunks I can feel rising or I will receive another punch. My heart starts to race and I can feel the blood that is seeping from my tongue. I was trying my best to focus on everything around me.

"You ignorant and shameless cretin." He yelled at me. "How dare you lay a hand on your cousin, you dumb bitch." Blair was still freaking out next to the monster that gave me life. "It's okay baby." He reassured her. "We will figure it out together. Why don't you go back to bed, you have a modelling job in the morning and I will deal with her." She nodded knowing what was waiting for me as soon as she left.

I woke up the next day again in a hospital bed next to my mother. This place always confused me because it isn't a hospital but it takes care of those with long term illnesses like my mother who had been in a coma or people who had a stroke. It always confused me how I ended up here after every time my father beat me. I didn't mind being here because it gave me a break from the evil hands of my father and cousin and I also got to spend time with my mum which was becoming less and less, the older I became. The sperm donor always told me that it was because the older I became the more disobedient I was so it was a punishment, but I knew it was the only way he had control over me. I couldn't afford the care my mother was receiving and he was paying for everything. I tried to sit up and the pain seared through my stomach. I could feel my pulse in my face from the strike.

As I made my way out of bed and sat in a chair next to the one person I loved on the planet I broke down in tears. "Mum" I cried. "I know this was my fault but could you please wake up." I had to make sure that the nurses didn't hear me or they would call my dad. "I don't know how much longer I can take this." I know I can hear the pleading in my head but at this point I really don't care.

"Please wake up!"

"Miss Barnes" The nurse came from behind me and made me jump which had me wincing in pain. "You are awake. How are you feeling?" She asked inquisitively. I can't respond and I don't know if she knows sign language so I just stick my thumb up. "I will call your dad and tell him you are awake." I start to shake my head in panic. I don't want him here, he will control everything, right now I have some time with my mum and I want to be able to spend it with her. She tells me she has to and leaves the room.

"Mum, please wake up" I start to beg her in my head again. "I don't want to be here anymore." I climb back into the bed that is next to her and cry myself to sleep tasting the salty tears that were falling from my eyes.

I don't know how long I am asleep before I am woken up by a slap to the back of my head. "WAKE UP b***h!" The female voice demanded. I groggily turn around to find the Blair witch standing above me glaring down as if I had murdered her new pet. "We need to talk!" I sighed knowing that there is no way I was getting out of this.

"What is it?" I signed. I had a headache that she had made worse with the slap. I had to take my dad's abuse but when she tried I couldn't stand it. I had to always take it though or suffer the consequences.

"In your dream...." She looked nervous. For the first time in my life I saw the princess of our family nervous. "Why did you have to have Hunter's baby?"

"I don't know." I told her. "My dream was only in the delivery room. You laughed and watched as I died." She couldn't control the laughter and it was a loud witch like cackle. I always tried to find the good in her but I don't think she has any decency in her.

"You would make everyone happy if you weren't here anymore." She scathed at me. "Uncle wouldn't have to deal with a mute as a daughter, who he will have to support for the rest of his life." With every word that slipped from her mouth. "You are lucky I gave you a job to help Uncle pay the bills he has from you." What she didn't tell anyone is that all of her songs that were popular were all written by me. The films and television programmes she had script writer's credits for were again written by me. My dad found out I had a talent for writing when he found that I was acing English Literature and my Creative Writing courses. He asked to read them and found that they were interesting so sent them to a publisher and it got picked up. He pulled me from school the same day and home schooled both Blair and I so that I could write things to "help" the family with bills, little did I know it would be Blair Dorian's name on them rather than mine. She was now one of the most sought after writers in the industry. If you were to Google her she would have 2 Grammies, an Oscar and she was nominated many times for Emmy's but had never won yet. She wanted to become one of the only writers in history to have an EGOT. When the requests for interviews started to come in, my Dad told me I was going to work as her assistant to earn my keep. My internal rant was interrupted by her pushing me in the ribs causing me to shudder. The pain shot through my chest and into my lungs making it difficult to breathe. "Well......." She stood tapping her toes in whatever designer shoes she had bought recently. "Answer the question. WHY WAS IT YOU HAVING HIS BABY AND NOT ME?" She was now shouting at me for an answer I didn't have.

"I don't know." I told her again. "My dreams don't work like that. I can only see parts of what is happening, I don't know everything about the situation."

"Urgh" She screamed like a brat. "I need to figure this out." I could see she was getting more stressed out the more she thought about it. Part of me felt sorry for her but there was a bigger part of me that didn't care.

"Sooo..." The doctor that was responsible for looking after my mum walked in. "Miss Roberts, I really need you to start being careful. With some of the breaks in your ribs you were lucky not to puncture a lung." My seed donor and the spawn of Satan glanced at each other in worry. The both knew if anything ever happened to me their lavish lifestyle would be over. I knew it to. "You cannot take anymore breaks to your ribs." The doctor looked at me with the seriousness that you expected of someone being told they were dying. "Do you understand?"

"Yes" I signed back not knowing if he understood.

"She replied that she understood." Blair interrupted. She took sign language classes with me so she could understand if I was being rude to my Dad as he didn't want to learn.

"Okay" The doctor gave me a comforting smile. "You can go home tomorrow but you have to rest." I hold up my hand to indicate that I understood and he left.

"Uncle the tests?" Blair questioned.

"Oh Doctor!" My dad stopped him from leaving. "We asked you to test the fertility of both girls while she was here. Did you get the results?" The doctor gave him a side glance at such a weird request.

"Oh I didn't order any test like that?" He questioned. "Your daughter is accident prone and mute; she shouldn't consider pregnancy at this time." He told my father in seriousness. "She is not in a physical state to be anyone's mother right now."

"Oh no" He responded. "My niece is thinking of having a child and we wanted to make sure everything was okay for both girls while we were here." My dad was the one that deserved the Oscar not my cousin. He managed to act liked the concerned parental figure every time and played it well.

"Oh okay."

"Did you get the results?" My father asked again but this time his patience was a little more frayed.

"I don't know; I didn't know these tests were ordered." The doctor told him. "I will have to speak to the nurses and lab and come back to you shortly."

"No problem, no problem." We all watched as the doctor walked out of the room. Blair sat in the chair next to me and reached out for the television remote. She threw her blonde hair over her shoulder and switched to the channel that she was obsessed with. Her perfectly manicured nails were tapping against the plastic of the remote as she was waiting to catch a glimpse of the person that I was laying here thinking of. Hunter Matthews. The loud pitch scream had me shuddering when she saw him on the screen. The feelings I felt for him came sweeping back to me like a freight train....