The Last Pendragon

Chapter 11

“Couples don’t stay together forever, you know,” Lyza murmured to Norak. He had snuck into her dorm room and they laid on her bed together as he traced circles on her back. She laid on her stomach and he perched on his elbow beside her.

Norak smiled. “I don’t know. I think if a man and woman truly love each other, then their love will conquer everything.”

Lyza laughed and turned her head to glance at him. “Love conquers all? Come on, Norak. You’re not naive, are you?”

Norak grinned and leaned in to kiss her forehead. “Is it naive to believe in true love?”

Grinning, Lyza blinked and wiggled closer to him as she twisted so she was lying on her side. “True love, huh? Are you saying you’re in love with me, Norak?”

In response, he smoothly pressed her down so that her back rested against the bed and he on top of her. His warm breath on her skin made her shiver, as he kept his arms on either side of her to keep his weight from crushing her. Norak’s lips pressed against hers and she deepened it. Their passion formed as one and when they separated, Lyza was breathless. “Yes, I’m in love with you, Lyza.”

I’m in love you, Lyza! Norak’s voice screamed in her mind, jolting her from her sleep. Lyza shot awake, starting Kenji who had been leaning against a tree beside her. To her left, Matt slept, his breathing harsh and ragged as his body trembled and jerked. Far beyond him, Kharro slept in his human form. “Where are we?” Lyza blinked and rubbed her eyes.

Kenji shrugged. “Well we crossed the Atlantic, so I think we’re in Greenland. Kharro is flying us to London.”

Lyza nodded, breathing heavily.

“Bad dream?”

Lyza shrugged. “Depending on how you look at it.” Her eyes flitted toward Matt.

“I think he’s having a nightmare. He’s been shaking this whole time, but he needs rest. They say never to wake a soldier when they’re sleeping, so…” Kenji shrugged and the expression on his face made him seem like a helpless boy, unsure of what to do.

Lyza’s heart broke for him. “Soldier?”

Kenji nodded. “He fought for America in Afghanistan. He did two tours. I never thought about what it must have been like for him, but now… Seeing how he’s changed…” Kenji’s voice trailed off as he stared at Matt’s sleeping form.

“You never really thought about what he might have gone through, did you?” Lyza asked him.

“No. Not until now. I haven't seen him in years, I mean, this is the first time I've seen him after his second deployment. I just... He's changed so much. It's changed him. When I saw him after his first tour, I never noticed. I knew he'd been captured back then, but I never knew he was tortured. Not until now. How did I miss it, Lyza? How did I not see what he'd been through?”

“Maybe he hid it from you,” Lyza suggested with a shrug.

Kenji shook his head and she hated seeing him so hurt.

“I don't know. Now it's like he's a completely different man. He's in so much pain, I know it, but he hides it. What can I do for him? I feel so helpless.”

Lyza glanced at Matt and her heart ached for him as well. “Look, when this is over, you’ll have all the time in the world to help Matt.” Lyza smiled, trying to encourage him. Ever since Norak betrayed her and her own people turned against her, Lyza was never good at encouraging others. How could she tell someone else it would be okay, when she didn’t really believe it herself?

Kenji scoffed. “That was… intense. The Mages are gonna be there waiting for us every time. I’m not sure we’ll survive it next time.”

Lyza smiled and reached out to place her hand on his. Something about it made her feel safe and secure, but she tried to push the strange feeling away. She had already trusted and loved one man and he had tried to kill her. Deep inside, she couldn’t bring herself to trust anyone else. Not that way, at least.

Kenji squeezed her hand. “You’re shaking,” he whispered.

“I’m just cold,” Lyza lied smoothly.

Kenji shook his head. “I don’t think so. I can see it in your eyes. My mother had the same look about my dad. You’ve been burned before, haven’t you? Emotionally, I mean.”

A lump formed in Lyza’s throat, keeping her from answering as the words caught in her throat. Instead, she simply nodded, looking at their intertwined hands.

With his free hand, Kenji placed his fingers beneath her chin and forced her to look up at him. “No woman deserves to be betrayed or hurt by a man. Not physically, mentally, or emotionally. Whatever your ex did to you—I’m sorry. I’m not going to try to convince you to trust me, even though you can, because I know how hard it must be for you to believe anyone after what happened. But… someday, a man will come into your life who can remind you what it feels like to trust again.”

Closing her eyes, Lyza felt tears in them. “I think you already have.” Her voice was a breath in the light breeze, just a whisper, so soft she wasn’t sure he heard it.

She felt something warm against her cheek so when she opened her eyes, she was surprised to see Kenji lightly kissing her cheek. Smiling, she blushed and looked at the ground. “I used to be a major flirt, you know. Confident, secure… I’d walk straight up to a guy and ask him on a date or to hang out and now… After Norak, I just…” Lyza sighed, running her hands through her long red hair. She began to braid it and having to place her concentration in something so simple somehow comforted her.

Kenji nodded. “I was the same way. Then my parents divorced and it made me think that love doesn’t last. They were married and they didn’t stay together. So I stop trying after that. Just focused on helping my mom. The divorce wrecked her.”

*****

“Move, move, move!” Matt followed the orders of his squad commander and darted down the road, checking every street with his rifle out and ready. Ahead of him, two soldiers kicked down the door to a small hut.

Logan, his best friend, stayed right by his side as they entered the room. Matt aimed his rifle at one of the men inside, only to find that it was a young child. “We’ve got friendlies,” his commander said into a walkie. “Permission to pull out?”

“Negative,” came the response.

“Where are the soldiers hiding?” Matt asked in Arabic.

“Not here,” the child answered. He was trembling.

Matt heard a loud beeping.

“Bomb!”

Everything turned to complete chaos; the bomb on the kid exploded, just as Matt and Logan dove out of the door. Stones and debris rained down on them, just as Logan and Matt were thrown backward. Matt’s ears rang and his vision blurred.

Logan stood up and stumbled backward, right on a hidden I.E.D. The force of the second explosion threw Matt thirty feet behind him until he slammed against the door of another hut, breaking his shoulder. His ears rang louder until his hearing completely disappeared.

He couldn’t hear the gunshots as he was pulled into unconsciousness. Agony consumed his wounded body.

Matt’s eyes snapped open and he stayed perfectly still. He shifted his hand to clench Excalibur’s hilt. It pulsed with magical energy and that single idea oddly helped him cling to reality. Voices rose and his breathing stopped so he could hear what was going on. It came from behind him.

“...focused on helping my mom. The divorce wrecked her,” Kenji was saying.

Guilt consumed Matt. Not once after he had heard of the divorce did he come to America to visit his mother. After Logan’s death, Matt spent six months in recovery and physical therapy. He went back to Japan with his dad on medical leave and heard of the divorce. His mind was still back in Afghanistan with his entire squad; they died and he hadn’t. Yet, Matt hadn’t recognized anything anymore. Not the dojo or his old friends, not his girlfriend or his dad. He pulled away and distanced himself. It was hard to sleep, hard to eat, hard to walk down the street and buy food without looking around every corner, waiting for an enemy everywhere he went. Matt didn’t recognize anything and he didn’t know how to cope. Sometimes, he spaced out and other times, he completely blacked out. His fingers itched for a rifle and fighting was the only thing that seemed to normalize everything. Consumed with grief and flashbacks every time he closed his eyes, Matt never once thought about his mother or the divorce and what it had put her through. He swallowed deeply and closed his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Lyza responded to Kenji. “Do you mind me asking what happened?”

“My father was more married to the military than he was to her. I saw how it tore my family apart, which is why I didn’t join like he wanted me to. He and Matt saw me as lazy and irresponsible. Here my father had his perfect eldest son who was willing to fight and die for his country and yet his youngest… Didn’t.” Kenji’s voice sounded bitter.

Each word was a knife to Matt’s heart.

“At least, that’s how my father saw it,” Kenji murmured.

“Not you and Matt?”

“No. After the divorce, I barely spoke to him. He never called me back, never wrote, never visited. I don’t know. I figured he took my dad’s side since he lived with him in Japan and didn’t wanna talk to me since I took Mom’s side.”

“Maybe you don’t know the whole story,” Lyza suggested.

Matthew was hooked up to breathing machines as he woke up to see Haruto standing at the foot of his hospital bed.

“I had you transferred here with me,” Haruto said. “You'll be spending the next six weeks in recovery, Matthew. Y - You were the only one to make it alive.”

Unable to fully register what happened, Matthew stared into space as he retreated into his old bedroom in his mind - his safe place.

Haruto cleared his throat. “I haven't spoken to your mother or brother yet. Figured it would be worse on them, but it's your call. Did you want to talk to them?”

Yet Matthew didn’t hear him. He didn’t notice as Haruto walked over to a doctor by the door and said, “He's still unresponsive. Is there anything you can do?”

“I'm afraid not. He's suffered massive trauma and even though he's out of the woods, I believe he is suffering from PTSD. Right now he's in a dissociative state, probably due to the fact that his squad all died out there. Just give him time, sir.”

Haruto glanced back at Matthew, who still stared at the wall, unblinking.

Matthew blinked back tears, half of him actually remembering it and the other half imagining Haruto and the doctor talking, from what Haruto had told Matt afterward. Most everything after that, including his immediate days in the hospital, were all a blur.

“Maybe,” Kenji was saying. “Still, I thought if he had a good reason, he would have said something, but he never did. And now… Knowing that he never told me about being tortured, I’m wondering what else Matt never told me, why he never opened up to me or told me anything.”

My entire squad died out there and I was injured. The hospital diagnosed me with PTSD and I didn’t know what to do, Matt wanted to say. Instead, he groaned and sat up, pretending to finally wake up.

“Matt, hey,” Kenji said.

Matt sat up, looking at Lyza and Kenji who both sat opposite of the camp fire from him. “You feeling better?” Kenji asked.

Matt nodded. “I’m good to go.” In all honesty, his entire body ached as if he had been run over by a train, but he pushed it aside to focus on their mission. “We still have two more sigils, so we should get going.”

“Already up.” Kharro sighed and by the time Matt stood up and turned around, Kharro was already in his dragon form.

His muscles were stiff and he felt lightheaded. Matt blinked several times before he finally forced himself to move. By that time, Lyza and Kenji were already on top of Kharro.

“You sure you’re okay, Matt?” Kenji looked down at him.

Matt climbed on, watching Excalibur to ensure it didn’t fall from where it was sheathed at his side. “Yeah, I’m good. Promise.”

Kharro took off flying, heading toward London and an unknown future.