THE SCARLET WOMEN

Story 2 - Julia

He already had left early in the morning with a blank cheque and a note on the table,' I’ll call you later Miss Scarlet.' I just tore the cheque and collected my clothes and materials and left immediately.

For that whole day, I just decided to stay in my room and wait for his call. Several calls were coming but none of them was from him. I just declined every client saying I was not feeling well for that day. Now the beginning of every day starts with a wait and ends with it. I stopped seeing my clients and keep myself more occupied within myself. I don’t want to meet anybody except him. I was 'bout losing the track of time passing by. For God's sake where are you, Mr. Christopher? Why are you not calling me? I rang him like a thousand times every day but his cell was always kept off. I also texted and left messages for him several times but none of them were replied.

I always had been through like this in circumstances when nothing makes any sense. Life was sinful but not self-annihilated. Love never was comprehensible and meaningful for me. It always had been a trivial issue. An inconsequential but eloquent thought creates the surrounding of losing syndrome. It is a syndrome of being vulnerable, naked, and defenseless in front of devil. Falling in love is to jeopardize your hatred which makes you feeble and weak. And devil takes over you, makes you slave, tears your mind and body, and takes your soul away and leave soulless.  You become minion and tragically challenged just like standing beneath the sun which does not cast a shadow. My odyssey of prostitution is the war I fight with myself every day over and over again. But for that one day with you, made me feel like this war's over now. I felt like lovers who could fight together every war and survive every battle. Waiting for your call breaks me infinitely and again makes me feel being r***d again. This feeling of suicide never came to me before no matter how brutal and ugly this life seemed. But now it’s the only thought that the devil is shouting inside my head and trying to break the prison of glass. I know why this feeling is coming to me though I never believed in love until I met you. I never wanted to die for hatred but always for love just like in movies and stories. I still don’t believe in it as I never got a chance to fall into it like other young people. But I know dying for love is not suicide. 

Suddenly somebody knocked on the door. Who's there? –I asked.

-Hey, Scarlet darling. Howdy? -Julia was out there.  She was the only friend I could expect.

-Is everything all right? Where have ye' been all the time? Why aren't ye' answering your phone? –Julia asked me and came inside with a bag full of things to eat.

-No, no…everything is fine Julia. You know all these craps and shits we burden ourselves every day. I was just trying to loosen them a little and make me feel better. But I'm glad that you are here Julia –I said and just sat beside her.

-Ohhh…my darling. I was just feeling concerned about you as you were not picking up my calls and not seen for long at the lounge too. So I just came to see you guessing you're kept busy –she said and just hugged me. Look what I've brought for you! She just pulled out a box of pizza, some diet cokes, a pack of cigarettes, sandwiches, and a few bottles of beers from the bag. And the most favorite of us, f*****g party material, this pack of booze is going to let us fly wherever we want to,' –Julia said and lit a cigarette.

How could I felt abandoned when Julia was there with me? She justifies me being a prostitute because I never would have found myself if she was not there for me.  Julia is my strongest side who is more invincible and incorrigible. She always had been my courage since I lost everything of mine. Julia and I started this together and promised to end this together. We both wanted to run away and be free from this hell and redeem ourselves. But this world full of people has a little place for us. People have to realize that being a prostitute is never a choice of any girl but they are the ones who force us to be.

-Thanks for being here Julia. You just make some puffs and I'll cook something for us,' –I said and went inside the kitchen. She started refilling a few sticks of cigarettes with booze.

I looked at my phone- eleven o'clock. I was still carrying the phone with me. I heard a whisper in my ear. 'C'mon it's ready,' Julia hold my hand and pulled me. Just a minute, mine too almost ready. First I'd like to taste my cookery. It's been long I 'vent heard you appreciate it.' –she joined me at the window and we both were looking at the stillness and darkness of the night falling upon us.

Again this was different, we were already high somewhere else from every pain, misery, hatred, love, compassion, agony, convulsion, torment, paroxysm, laceration, distress, and affliction. I closed my eyes and floated away. And though I was thousands of feet up somewhere in dark skies above heaven I might have been back in Julia, because the scent and sounds of soft grunting, coughing, and laughing have always lulled me into the wilderness of the moment. Now I just want to believe in hateful and vengeance of the eyes of Julia, You know how much? How much…all? Much said through those eyes and our lips speaking the heart of heartless us in kisses.

-Ah, Ah…Julia started to touch me. She has got the same firm hand as him making me wet. High on booze and solitary confinement, now mind was not controlling my body. Her every touch was taking me to that night which I never wanted to leave behind me. That firmness and hypnotizing voice, that soft touch making my body quiver and tremble, those eyes undressing my soul, those awakening in heaven with the closing of eyes of both of us, and those murmuring and whispers always unheard but heard, that feeling of the beating of each other's heart like kept in the palm, those clinching of fists like a grip of the magnet, and those feelings of being him inside me like I'm not my life, those cries of pleasure, plateau taking its peak, and taking you to the summit of the Everest and zenith of origin, it all happened in one night.

-Julia…Julia…you cannot be just a glimpse behind those smells of smokes, for it is not into my dream you whisper but into my soul, for it is not you touch my body like the only man but like him…Just let our body dance to the tune of heaven, just take me to myself,' –Julia was already drifted to the joy of being me and nobody else. Oh, bird of my soul, just fly away to him and let him know that now he possesses mine.

-Let's get to bed,' –Julia just undressed me and I was doing exactly the same. How 'bout one more stick? Do you mind it?

-No, no Julia…I always wanted to be like you, seeing myself in your eyes. I wanted to be hated more when we can't have love. Today I want to lose myself and never be found. Today I want to get completely out of my mind, Today I want to live the life of the afterlife, Today I just want to die,' I started saying her name repeatedly holding her from the back.

-You already are completely out of your mind. I think you have fallen in love not with me but with someone else,' –Julia lit up the last one holding a beer in the other hand.

-No...No, I think you have gone out of your mind Julia. How could I fall in love when I'm afraid to lose someone whom I 'vent loved till now? I ain't falling in love; instead, love's falling out of me. And you…yes…You better know, we strumpets are not allowed to love.

-Just relax, take one more puff of it, and its all over,' –Julia held me that last cigarette. From that moment I just remembered being in bed with Julia and nothing more. 

'Twas early morning, the sun was shining and posies blooming with an early sign of the new day. Julia had already left like before, without waking me up. I just covered myself with a blanket and stood beside the window holding my phone. It still had nothing there for me. I just felt like throwing it away right from the window. Suddenly it started ringing. It was from one of my regular ones and now I decided to get back to my normal life.