Imprisoned Love

Down Spirals

Tori's POV:

I haven't seen Jade since lunch, and I'm starting to get a little worried. I mean, she sure does go missing a lot, but she usually has a good reason for it. Beck was talking to me at lunch today, and it was a pretty easy going conversation, until he mentioned Jade..

(Flashback)

"Hey Tor" Beck says happily, as he comes to sit next to me at our usual table.

"Hey Beck! How was your weekend?" I ask, matching his tone.

"It was alright.." he says, and we start off with a light conversation.

Suddenly, he gets pretty nervous and awkward.

"So, Tori.. umm.. about Jade.." he trails of, and I look up from my lunch.

"Yeah?"

"Um, I don't wanna be rude.. but you would understand if I told you that I still love Jade, right?"

I really don't like where this is going, but I nod my head anyways. Besides, this is what Jade wants. She wants Beck.. not me.

"And.. I think that, deep down, Jade still has a few feelings left for me as well.." he continues, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck.

"Beck" I interrupt him as he starts to stutter a little. "I-It's cool." I say, and he looks at me confused.

"It's cool?" he raises an eyebrow at my casual tone, and I gulp.

Chiz. He's suspicious.

"As in, I understand that you still love her and you two might get back together sometime in the future.." I quickly cover up, panicking slightly.

"And you're cool with that?" he asks, still really confused.

I sigh. "Of course I really like Jade, but it's like you said.. I just want her to be happy. And I remember a time when you were the reason she had a smile on her face. I know I'm probably just a rebound to her, but I'll be there for her until she figures out her feelings." I tell him in a soft tone, and he smiles brightly at me once he's out of shock.

"Wow. Thanks for being so considerate. You know most girls aren't like that." he says, and I smile at him.

"You were very considerate too Beck. Like when we talked outside Freezy Queen. I expected you to be mad at me or something, but you're a great guy, really." We both smile at each other, and before either of us can say anything else, I hear footsteps coming our way. I look up and slightly smile when I see Jade, but I see her frown when she sees that I'm sitting so close to Beck, so I quickly shift a little.

(End of flashback)

I hear the final bell ring, and grab my stuff and walk out the door. I look around for Jade, but I still can't see her anywhere.

She probably went home..

I sigh and go to my locker to fish out my books, before closing it and walking towards my car.

As I put on my seatbelt, I decide to text her really quick, because there's a nagging side of my brain that won't leave me alone until I do so. I text her a quick 'hey, you okay?', and then drive off. By the time I reach home, I still have no messages from Jade, and I get a tiny bit more anxious.

Obviously she won't reply. She never does..

I try to tell myself that she's fine, but what if she's not? What if she's hurt? What if she's angry at me? What did I even do to make her angry at me?

Stop jumping into far-fetched conclusions, Tori. Jade's fine.

I walk into the house, and surprisingly, my mom's there. I drop my bag, and she looks over at me and smiles.

"Hey Tori! How was school today?" she asks, and I don't even smile back at her. It's not like she actually gives a damn about what happened in school..

"It was alright. Sikowitiz gave us another proj-" I'm cut off by the sound of her phone ringing.

"Oh, give me a sec... Hey Gary." she says in a flirtatious tone. It's no secret that my mom likes my dad's friend from the police force, Gary Adams. At first, Trina and I tried not to look into it too much and hope that they were just good friends, but that piece of hope died down really quickly. The worst part is, dad's barely even around for us to tell him. He's so busy that he barely answers his phone most of the time. I sigh, and go upstairs to my room to start working on some homework.

It doesn't take long for me to finish it, as I'm pretty good when it comes to my grades and schooling. I check my phone for what feels like the hundredth time, and frown once again when I see that I've received no messages from Jade. I text her again telling her that I'm getting pretty nervous. Still no reply. I even try to distract my mind by watching some TV.. but nope. Jade's constantly on my mind.

I text her again and again, and just as I'm about to send my 17th text message, she replies..

Oh my God! She replied!

However, I don't stay happy for too long when I read her text message telling me to F off, and stop bothering the 'sh*t outta her'. I frown at how she's nearly always mad at me.

I was just wondering if she was okay. A simple 'yeah Tori, I'm fine' would have sufficed. But nope. Honestly. Why do I even bother caring about her? One, she's not gonna hate me any less. And two, she never cares about me..

I decide to go to bed in a grouchy mood because of Jade. My brain's too tired to even think about her. Why do I even like her? She's only ever treated me like chiz. I guess, I kinda enjoy our bickering every now and then.. but sometimes she just takes it too far. She'd do things that I'd never do to her, and it's just so infuriating. I guess it was just some little crush that I felt, but I'm over it now. I do not like Jade West. And I'm happy about it.

I smile as I close my eyes, thinking about how life will go back to the way things were, when Beck asks Jade out, and she says yes..

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I end up waking up late the next morning, as I didn't hear my alarm go off. I quickly get changed and head downstairs. Trina must've already left for school and she also drank the rest of the milk!

Great. No cereal for me today.

I decide to just skip breakfast entirely, and just grab something from the vending machines in school. I hurriedly drive off, and rush to my locker. I actually have about 5 minutes 'til first bell, so there's not really much of a need to rush. As I'm taking out my books for my next class, I see someone walking towards me in the corner of my eye. I turn around to see Jade. Usually, I'd smile at her, or peck her lips good morning. But not today. She has no idea how worried I was last night, only to receive a text message of her telling me to buzz off.

"Morning babe" she says, with some coffee in her hands, as she leans in to peck my lips. I hold out a hand to her chest, pushing her back a little.

"Don't you 'morning babe' me." I scowl at her, and she furrows her eyebrows.

"What's your deal?" she asks, while taking a sip from her coffee.

I slam my locker shut, and angrily take a deep breath. "Nothing. Let's just go to class" I say frustrated, and she raises an eyebrow at me.

"Vega, I've already got a lot of s**t on my plate, so just f*****g tell me what I did now" she growls, grabbing my arm, preventing me from going anywhere.

"Where the hell were you yesterday? I tried getting a hold of you for hours, and all you did was ignore me. And then when you finally reply, it's a text telling me to f off!" I shout at her, causing a few people to stare at us.

Jade simply blinks at me in shock, and I sigh. That felt good to let it all out..

"Vega, I just went out to think.." she says in a calm voice.

"Yeah but you could've told me that you were okay!" I yell, and her face breaks into a small smile, that she's trying to hide.

Is she seriously smiling when I'm yelling at her?? This girl is unbelievable!

"What the hell are smiling about!?"

"Sorry.. it's just.. nice to know that you care about me and that you were worried about my safety.." she says, and my anger flies out the window in an instant. She walks towards me and cups my cheek.

"I'm sorry I didn't text you Tori. I'll try to, next time." she says, and I smile underneath her touch.

Ugh. I can't even stay mad at her for more than a day!

"Okay." I give in, and she leans in to plant a small yet loving kiss on my lips, and I smile into it. When we pull back we look into each other's eyes, and it's pretty clear that the only thing in them is lust.

"We should go to class then" she tells me, and I nod taking her hand in mine and walking towards her class.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's finally lunch, and I head towards Festus' Grub Truck. I order a ravioli before sitting down along with my friends at our usual table. I made a mental note to ask Jade what she was even thinking about yesterday, as I didn't have time to ask her this morning. Speak of the devil, here she comes as she struts over to our table confidently.

"Hey babe." I smile at her, and she leans in to give me a quick kiss before sitting down next to me. She places her hand on my thigh underneath the table again, and squeezes it lightly. It's such a cute gesture..

"Hey are y'all free this Saturday?" Andre asks, in his chirpy tone, and a chorus of 'yes's are said.

"Why what's on?" I ask him.

"Well, my uncle's away for the weekend, and he said that I can throw a sick party so long as I clean up afterwards. So are you all in?" he asks excitedly, and we all get excited as we nod our heads.

"Awesome!" he says, high-fiving Beck.

We finish up our lunch, and I can't help but to notice how weird Beck and Jade are acting. Beck gives her these longing stares, and every time Jade catches him. he looks away. The weird thing is, Jade doesn't seem to scowl at him like she usually does. Instead, she seems to go into deep-thought for some reason.

Hmm, that's strange.

As I get up to throw away the leftover food in the trash, Jade pulls me back, looking at me as if she wants to say something.

"Yeah?" I ask, as she simply stares at me. She looked as if she was about to speak up for a second, but shakes her head after thinking about it. I raise an eyebrow at her, but she lets go of my hand so I decide to talk to her about it later. After returning to her from the trash can, I see her talking to Beck.

I guess she's following up on my advice and getting along with him.

I'm about to give them some privacy but just then Beck walks away in the other direction, so I decide to approach her.

"Hey Jade?" I call, and she turns around, looking like she's lost right now for some reason.

"Y-yeah?"

"I never got to ask you this morning. Why did you go out thinking yesterday in the first place?" I ask her curiously, and she gets a bit nervous.

Huh. Odd.

"Umm.. no reason.." she says, and I don't believe it for a second. I furrow my eyebrows at her, but she just walks away from me, and now I know something's up. One, she didn't peck my lips goodbye, and two, Jade never talks that nervously unless she's hiding something.

Honestly though, she's been acting weird all day. Like she's been extra affectionate towards me today, and she'd do cute but random things, like hold the door for me or kiss me in the middle of a class. I'm not complaining or anything.. but it's just very weird of her to do. And after doing those things, she always has a look on her face. The kind of look that says that she's deep in thought, or that she's contemplating on something. I don't know what it is, but I'm gonna get to the bottom of whatever's bothering her..

I shrug my shoulders, and walk off to my next class, thinking about Jade the whole time. Do I like her? I don't really know anymore honestly. I thought I did.. but then I was really mad at her last night.. but now I somehow like her even more.

I wish I could just tell her how I feel. But she'll get so angry at me for ruining everything. Deep down, I'm hoping Beck never asks her out, but he told me he still has feelings for her, and I guess he'll be asking her back any time now. The thought of them getting back together is just so depressing for me now.. but I know Jade will never like me. I guess I'll just have to get used to the feeling of being rejected..

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Jade's POV:

Things have been down-spiralling at a very fast pace recently.. I have no idea what to do between this whole Beck and Tori drama. I thought I loved Beck, and I still think I do.. but why do I feel so attached to Tori? I can't seem to stop looking at her and smiling at every cute thing she does. Like when she bites the end of her pen in class as she's concentrating.. or when she mindlessly twirls a strand of her hair when she's nervous..

I guess I've been paying more attention to Vega than I thought..

But Beck's a great guy too. He's so sweet and all he's ever done was treated me right when we were together. He's a very loyal boyfriend and I kinda miss him too..

But I can't imagine going back to hating on Vega, probably coz I don't hate her anymore. I used to.. but how can I hate someone so sweet and perfect? It was so adorable when she was mad at me for not texting her when I was at my thinking spot.. well not the yelling part.. but definitely the part when she was worried about me. It just really showed that she cares about me.. And I care about her too. I just hope she knows that. I'm not one for expressing my feelings that often, but it doesn't mean that I don't have them.

Ugh, what am I gonna do and who am I gonna choose? The worst part is, I don't wanna hurt either of them..

Well technically you won't be hurting Vega since she probably doesn't even like you..

Shut up Jade.

I'm going through such an intense battle in my own head, that I don't even hear the final bell ring, signalling the end of school. I only awake from my daze when I feel a soft hand on my shoulder.

"Everything okay, babe?" Tori asks, in a concerned tone as she studies my face, and I quickly nod my head.

"Yup." I say a bit too quickly, and she raises an eyebrow at me before slowly nodding her head. She looks like she's about to question my weird behavior, but I quickly walk away before she can say anything.

I walk towards my locker and mindlessly put my books away.

Vega's so cute when she's worried about me..

"Hey Jade, can we talk?" I hear a soft familiar voice, and I turn around to see Vega standing behind me, playing with her bag strap.

"Vega, I'm tired and I wanna go home" I tell her, mostly because she's probably gonna ask me a bunch of questions as to why I've been acting so weird lately, and honestly, I don't think I can lie when Vega looks deep into my eyes like she does. So I guess my only other option is to ignore her.

Or you could just tell her the truth about what Beck told you..

No way!

"Oh okay. Well wanna come over to mine later?" she asks hopefully.

"No!" I say a little louder than I intended to, and she jumps a little. "Sorry, I'm just a little ticked off lately because of... school and homework" I quickly cover up, and I know she knows that I'm lying.

See! I can't lie when I'm around her.

"Jade.." she sighs, but I hurriedly shut my locker and zip up my bag, silencing her.

"Um, Vega I gotta go.. collect Tyler. I'll.. see you tomorrow" I say, and she frowns when I start walking away from her.

"Wait!" she calls, and I shut my eyes and internally groan. I really just don't wanna deal with this right now. It's bad enough that she'll never actually like me.. and it's f*****g s**t that she doesn't even know how I really feel about her. Ugh, how is she gonna react if she finds out that Beck already asked me out.. and I didn't say yes yet. She's probably looking for the opportunity to leave me and-

"Jade?" Tori snaps her fingers in my face, and I blink at her.

When did she get in front of me?

"What?" I say in a small and defeated tone. She furrows her eyebrows, but doesn't question it, thankfully.

"Um, you didn't kiss me goodbye.." she says quietly, as she studies every inch of my facial expressions. I start to get nervous, and my heart picks up a little.

I don't wanna keep stringing myself on like this. It's just unhealthy. Vega will never like me, and she's gonna be so happy when I finally leave her for Beck. But I don't want to leave her for Beck.. well not yet anyways..

"Right.. silly me" I say awkwardly, and she waits for me to lean in. I sigh and lean in, only to kiss her right cheek. Once I pull back, I see her dipped eyebrows as she stares at me. Before she can speak up, I practically run out of the school, not looking behind.

Ugh, what am I gonna do about these unwanted feelings towards Vega..

I speed walk to my car, pushing people away as I do so, and quickly get in before Vega calls me again.

If only she knew how I really felt..

I hit my head against the steering wheel and groan.

Why do things have to be so complicated? I'm supposed to be in love with Beck. And when you're in love with someone, you're not supposed to like anyone else other than that person right? Then why do I like Vega so much? What's so special about her that makes me wanna puke rainbows and s**t.

Ugghhh.

I back up the car and start driving, my mind still racing at all of the thoughts.

I mindlessly drive towards Tyler's school, and he hops into the car, with his regular frown on his face. No words are exchanged when he gets in, which is a pretty usual thing, and I start driving back home.

"Is Tori coming over soon?" The pre-turd suddenly asks, and I raise my eyebrows, not looking away from the road.

"No" is all I say, and I notice his frown as soon as the word leaves my mouth.

Guess I'm not the only one who's gonna miss having Tori as my fake girlfriend..

"Hey Tyler?" I say in an usually soft tone, and I mentally cringe when I realise.

He looks pretty shocked too and raises his eyebrows at my voice.

"Yeah?"

"How, um, close are you with Tori?" I ask.

"We're pretty close. She's one of the very few people who understands me, and focuses on the good instead of the bad" he says with a small smile.

Yup, that's Vega alright.

"Um.. how would you feel if we were ever to.. split up?" I ask curiously, and he looks at me with a surprised look on his face.

"One, I'd never speak to you again for taking away my reason to smile everyday.." he says seriously, and I roll my eyes at him. "And two, I'd think it would mostly be your loss, as Tori's perfect for you. She changes you for the better, and you've started to become nicer.. even to me, since you started dating her."

Wow.

I scowl at him for a few seconds, but then I go into deep thought. Coz now that I think about it, he's right. Without Vega, I'll go back to my rude, arrogant self. Vega's the one who makes me feel bubbly and giddy inside. She makes me smile in the mornings. It's like she's my personal unlimited supply of coffee, that brightens up my day.

But what about Beck? I can't leave him.. he's been my boyfriend for more than a year and.. I can't imagine not being with him anymore. Although, we are fighting a lot more recently.. and maybe it would be for the best if we moved on to see new people.. Maybe.

But first, I gotta know how Vega feels. She's barely given me any signs to show that she likes me and I don't f*****g know how to read her mind, so how am I supposed to get her to like me? I've tried being more affectionate and nice towards her.. but I guess I'm just trying to figure out whether I like her more than Beck. And in conclusion.. I think I do.

But who knows how it'll be if we actually dated. I mean, I know we're dating right now.. but what if this is all just part of her act, and she's just a really good actress? I guess I'll never know unless I actually date her for real.. but that'll never happen..

Unless you suck up your balls and just tell her how you feel.

As of right now, I don't think I should tell Vega about the whole Beck situation just yet because I know she'll have a lot of questions and I'm honestly just not ready to confess my feelings to her. Not until I get some sort of indication from her that she likes me too.

But at the same time, I can't ignore her forever. She's already starting to feel suspicious, and I can't lie to her..

"Jade? Are you not coming in?" I hear Tyler's annoying voice break my thoughts, and I blink in shock when I realise I've already pulled into my driveway. I was so lost in my thoughts that I hadn't even realised that I was mindlessly driving, which could've be very dangerous.

I sigh and get out of the car, and unlock the front door, letting the pre-turd go in first. I walk towards the couch in the living room and plop onto it.

Vega will never like me. I've blackmailed her, threatened her and hurt her.. she deserves someone wayy better than me to be honest. Someone who'll treat her right. Someone who'll be there for her. Someone who she can trust..

I sigh sadly, and then suddenly hear my phone chime, so I take it out to see that I've received a message from Beck.

Beck: Hey Jade, you okay?

Ugh I don't wanna have to deal with this right now..

But before I can even ignore his message, Beck's name and picture flashes on my screen as he tries to call me.

Ughh.

"What" is the first thing I snap at him when I accept the call.

"Are you okay? You looked a little lost today and I was just checking.." he trails off in a soft voice, making me feel bad for snapping at him.

"I'm fine" I say through gritted teeth, hoping he doesn't push it further.

I hear a sigh from the other end of the phone, and I'm just wishing he would hang up soon, but that doesn't look like it's gonna happen anytime soon.

Why did I pick up in the first place?

"Jade.. I've dated you for so long. I think I'd know if you're upset or frustrated, just by the tone of your voice.." he says in a calm voice, and I raise my eyebrows even though he can't see me.

"I-I'm not-"

"Yes you are Jade. You've been like that all day and I have a feeling it's my fault because of what I told you" he admits sadly and I sigh. It's not that it's his fault.. it's just.. my fault I guess. I'm just realizing how easily I could've avoided all this confusion, if I had just talked it all over with Beck, and not blackmailed Vega..

And he doesn't deserve to wait for me either. I'm sure he'd have a line of girls waiting for him outside his door everyday, just for him to notice one of them.. but he probably won't coz that's how loyal he is. He really does love me.. and I'm starting to not feel the same towards him anymore.

For f**k's sake.

"Look Jade" he says, startling me a little. I was so in my thoughts that I hadn't even noticed I was still holding the phone to my ear. "I'm not forcing you to leave Tori or anything.. but don't you think that you should look it from her side of things too?" He asks, and I raise an eyebrow.

"What do you mean?"

"It's just.. Tori told me she knows that she's just your rebound, and she told me, quite happily might I add, that she wouldn't mind us getting back together.." he says in a confident tone, and I frown.

"When.. did she say that?" I ask, hoping he's lying. Tori wouldn't say that recently, right? I thought she was starting to like hanging out with me. I-I thought she was starting to like me.

I know I kept telling myself that she doesn't like me.. but deep down.. I dunno, I guess there was hope.. that she might actually like me back.

"Yesterday at lunch" he says, and my heart breaks a little.

All I can imagine is her happily eating her food and telling Beck that she can't wait for Beck and I to get back together. She can't wait to leave me.. she can't wait to get the f**k away from me..

It doesn't take long for my hurt and sadness to turn angry as I clench my fists and flare my nostrils.

"I gotta go" I say through clenched teeth before hanging up.

Why do I have to be such a f*****g retard!? I can't believe I actually thought that Vega liked me! And after all the sweet things I've done to her.. I guess I'm just not good enough for her! And it's true that she changed me into a 'better' person.. but now look where that's gotten me. My f*****g heart hurts like hell, while the old Jade would've never given a f**k! Well guess what.. I'm bringing the old Jade back!

Alright then Vega. You want me to leave you so f*****g bad.. then so be it!