Falling Stars, Rising Hopes

An Important Decision

                                                                                Chapter 9

    The number of scouts grew and grew. More kittens were being born, and more partials were being made. It was strange to see them in the middle of the transformation, with their bald necks that seemed too narrow to hold up their heads and eyes shining brighter than could be accounted for by the light around them. But it was a good strange, like seeing someone with a new haircut that suited them. 

    Sometimes, Tanya wished she were still working with them. But now that the staff were sure the transformation would work, and work consistently, only people with scientific degrees, like Felicia, worked with the partials, because the terminology was so complex. Tanya understood their reasoning. They needed people who spoke technobabble, and she didn't. 

    But, at the same time, there was something special about the partials' transformation that even the kittens couldn't match. Like seeing someone rise to their fullest potential and grasp something they'd never dreamed of having. There was an element of triumph about it, and the thrill of discovery. Working with the kittens was like working with a highly specialized computer. They were fun, and exciting, and always surprising her with what they could do. But the partials were like a computer built from scratch. Not so advanced, but she could see them developing, see the process, see every success and milestone. With the kittens, that had already been done.

    In early November, Dr. Daniels called her to his office, saying he had a request for her. It wasn't a long trip, just a few extra doors down the hallway. But she had plenty of time to wonder what he was calling her about, and why she had to come to his office. Normally, if a staff member wanted to talk with a base worker, they would just do it. Office visits were only for more formal, confidential conversations. And even those were rarely one-on-one. She wondered what was so important and so specific that he only needed to talk with her. The door was closed. She knocked.

    "Come in," he called. She did, closing the door behind her. Dr. Daniels was sitting behind his desk, looking through a screen. As she watched, he tapped a last command and put it down on the desk, display side down.

    "Have a seat," he said, gesturing to the chair in front of the desk. She sat down.

    "You're probably wondering why I called you here, and why no one else is with you."

    "Yes, sir."

    "I'll answer the second question first. The reason you're here alone is that there is a very important decision I need you to make, and we don't want to put pressure on you to answer in a certain way. This is your personal decision. There will be no advantages if you accept, no disadvantages if you decline. Your job will in no way be affected by your decision. Remember that." What does he want me to do that's so important? she wondered, but didn't ask.

    "Did you know, that of the 147 people working with the scouts, only three of them have cats of their own? There are four cats in this base that are not part of our experiment. Four cats, out of 487 people. Almost a shockingly small number, don't you think?"

    "Not really, given how few cats to people there were before."

    "True. But we specifically picked people to work with the scouts that love cats. You would think most of them would have had cats. And, actually, some of them did. Have you ever thought about how we got all these cats, Ms. Kerrigan?"

    "You got them from a breeder, right?"

    "Most of them, yes. But some of them were pets. Darien, Trumpet, and Ebony, for example. Their owners agreed to let them be part of the experiment because of an old rule that said no base staff were allowed to have their pets on site except in an emergency." Tanya was starting to understand.

    "You want Handful, don't you?" Dr. Daniels actually blushed..

    "Well, yes. There have been rumors going around that the bases are going to ban pets to lengthen the rationing time. I'm surprised Iris didn't tell you about them."

    "She probably didn't want to say anything until there was proof."

    "Well, the base staff has made a decision. Just in case the rumors are true, we are asking for the last four cats to become partials. That way, they will be part of a sanctioned experiment, and, thus, untouchable. If you don't want Handful to become a partial, she can be part of our control group, which will not be modified. Don't give me your decision now. Take a few days to think about it. It's an important decision, and not one to be taken lightly. I believe your shift starts in five minutes, so you'd better go." Tanya glanced at her watch. He was right.

    "Thank you, Dr. Daniels. I'll certainly consider it." Her watch beeped, and she glanced at it. Dr. Daniels had sent her the information about the partials. There were two documents, and she asked why.

    "The first was written for other biogeneticists. The second uses much clearer language. Ms. Gravari did the translation, if you want to use that word."

    "Ah." She appreciated the gesture. Scientific documents were twice as hard to read as normal ones, especially since she usually had to look up every third word.

    For three days, the question flickered at the edges of her mind. On the one hand, it would be so cool to talk to her cat and have her talk back, albeit with an accent. On the other hand, the transformation was still risky, and no one knew if there would be any long-term side effects. But Handful would so much better a life with the partials. She was lonely, spending most of her time in little rooms, and not understanding why she couldn't go meet the other cats. But what if being a partial just made it worse? What if the other cats would hate her because she wasn't part of the original group? And, this was the question that burned at her mind the most fiercely, what if Handful became a partial and decided she had had a better life as a cat? Tanya didn't want to ruin her life.

    Every chance she got, she studied Handful, trying to understand what she would want. She didn't get much than what she already knew. Something needed to change, but was that becoming a partial, or just joining the control group? On the third day, she made her decision. After her shift, she went to Dr. Daniels' office. Thankfully, he was in.

    "Ah, Ms. Kerrigan. Have you made your decision?"

    "I have. I'd like Handful to be a partial, if she may."

    "I thought you might. Here's the paperwork." Her watch beeped as the document came through.

    "I'll get it back to you by tomorrow. Will that be fine?"

    "Of course. But the procedures can't start until everything is signed." She nodded and left.

    As she answered the questions about Handful, her fingers shook. She made twice as many typos as she usually did. The reality of what she was going to do weighed on her. But this was what was best for Handful, and with that thought, she signed her name neatly and sent the document back to Dr. Daniels.

    The first procedure was at 3:00 the next day. At 2:56 on November 10, 2164, Tanya put Handful in her new cage. One of the rules was that the former owners were not allowed to visit their cats until the transformation was complete. So this was the last time they would see each other for four months.

    "Good luck, sweetheart," Tanya whispered, stroking Handful's fur and blinking hard against the tears that had appeared in her eyes. "See you in four months." Walking away from that cage was one of the hardest things she'd done in her life. Handful, unused to being confined so tightly, called and called for her like she never had before, even when Tanya was taking her to the vet.Only once the door to the partials' room closed could Tanya escape the sound.

    While the rules said she couldn't see Handful at all, the rooms' positioning meant they could easily be bent. After all, Tanya had to walk through the partials' room to get to work. It was inevitable that she would catch glimpses of Handful between cages, or as someone was cleaning her cage. But she never went over to her, only watched as long as she could before continuing on to the kittens' room.

    The four months passed in a dragging blur of kittens and evaluations and sitting in the common room bored out of her skull. Sometimes, she would play computer games with some of her coworkers, but everyone had their own tastes in games, which rarely overlapped. Most of the time, when she was't working or sleeping, she just sat in the common room and read a holobook, or watched other people playing games. Why is it so much more interesting to watch other people playing games than to do it yourself? she wondered. A lot of people agreed with her, as was evident by the  crowds that surrounded the best gamers, but no one could come up with an explanation.

    Finally, the day came. On March 10, 2165, Dr. Daniels called Tanya to the partials' room. She almost ran there, excitement threatening to spill out of her, mingled with a thread of nervousness. The moment of truth had come. She was about to find out if she had made the right decision.

    "You wanted me?" she asked, and Dr. Daniels smiled. He was standing next to a cage that had been set apart from the others and covered with a dark sheet.

    "I did. There's something I want to show you." He pulled the sheet away with a dramatic flourish, revealing Handful sitting primly in the center of the cage. There was something different about her, a glint in her eye that hadn't been there before. The cat-the partial-turned to look at her.

    "Thank you," she said. Tanya almost started crying. To hear her cat speaking was somehow even more amazing than hearing Battalion that first time.

    "You're welcome," she said, not sure which of their voices was rougher.