Falling Stars, Rising Hopes

Remembrance and Loyalty

    It was May 10, 2165, the first anniversary. The entire base was tense. Predicting this, the staff had set up a room where people could record their thoughts about the past year. While they weren’t ordered to do it, it was highly encouraged. Tanya went during her lunch break. Unsurprisingly, Adira was the one operating the recorder.

    “Hi, Tanya. Come to chat?” she asked.

    “Yup.”

    “Well, you’ve come to the right place.” She scrolled along her screen. “Let’s see. We’ve talked a lot about the base, but not much about how you came here. How did you?”

    A green light appeared on the small gray block, and it projected a holographic face. Even after eight months, Tanya had no idea why she called it Junior. “I had heard a lot about the meteor shower. It was supposed to be spectacular…” She went on to tell her about everything that had happened from the time she first heard about the meteor shower to her first shift with the cats. Occasionally, Adira would ask her to clarify something or to stop chasing a rabbit trail. Never in those words, of course, but the intent was clear. She talked until her watch alarm went off with a vibrating buzz that shook her arm.

    “Off,” she said. “I guess I’d better go.”

     “All right.” She turned off the recorder, and Tanya hurried out the door. She'd never realized before exactly how quickly things with the rats had happened. She had gone from an entry-level worker in a computer voice company to a member of the SSCR program in, she stopped to count on her fingers, about four hours. But it had seemed more like four days.  An hour, especially an exciting one, was a lot longer when you were living it than when you were remembering it.

    That shift was one of the most depressing ones she had. Most of it was spent talking with the kittens about the rats, based off a series of notes Dr. Daniels had sent out the night before. There were a lot of videos of the destruction they caused and discouraging statistics about the bases. Mixed in with it all was the idea that the scouts had a duty to protect the humans and to work with them to free the planet from the rats. Tanya wasn’t happy about that part. It seemed too much like propaganda to her, but no one else seemed to share her concerns, so she didn’t say anything after her initial comment. At least she’d learned that much. Used to be, she’d jump into just about any argument she cared about, regardless of whether or not other people agreed with her. Now, she could almost feel herself becoming more cautious, more reluctant to voice her opinion if there didn’t seem to be support, and generally just less willing to take a risk if it meant lowering other peoples’ opinion of her. When did that change? she wondered, and had no idea of the answer.

    The base decided to cheer people up by showing a comedy holovid that evening. It was too little, too late, in Tanya’s opinion, but at least they didn’t have to go to bed with the depressing images and phrases they had come across all day flashing through their minds. To her surprise, she ended up sitting next to George, and they talked a bit before the vid started. 

    It was nothing special, just a bunch of people going about their everyday lives and having funny everyday problems. But, to Tanya's surprise, there were people crying through the whole vid, mourning the loss of their old lives. She didn't know who, she tried not to notice at all. It helped that she didn't know that many people outside of her job. But the memory stuck with her for a long time, the sound of quiet sobbing undercutting even the funniest scenes. 

    Jason found her just after the vid ended, meandering over from the gaming center as the crowd was starting to disperse.

    “Don’t you think that’s a little inappropriate, Tanya, screeching like a banshee on the anniversary of the shower? You ought to pay some respect.” His voice carried over the room like oil on water, waiting for a flame, as he loomed over her. She stepped back slightly, and he moved forward so she almost had to strain her neck to look him in the eye. Who was he to tell her what to do? She was a grown woman, not some eight-year-old to be ordered about by any adult who took a mind to it. Besides, she hadn't been "screeching like a banshee" at all. Laughing, yes, but not screeching with it.

    “Don’t you think that’s a little inappropriate, Jason, coming up to people and insulting them for no reason?” she returned in the same tone.

    “I’m merely attempting to maintain the solemnity of the occasion.”

    “Ooh. Fancy,” Tanya mocked, hoping he couldn't sense her growing nervousness. He was obviously spoiling for a fight, and she didn't want to be his target. “But who says you can tell me what to do?”

    “Society.” Was he going to play that card, then? Cheater’s way out. Answer the question without actually answering the question, and hope the answer is fancy enough to intimidate them. Well, too bad. She'd taken enough sociology classes to explain to him, in detail, why he was wrong. But a simpler answer would do the job just as well.

    “Oh? Are you going to do the whole ‘Men are superior to women’ thing? I thought we grew out of that ages ago.”

    “Don’t mock me,” Jason snarled. She instinctively flinched from his tone, and a tiny smile flickered around his mouth.

    “You’re mocking me,” Tanya pointed out, keeping her voice level. “If you’re doing it, I figure I can do it, too.”

    “Too bad. Life doesn’t work that way.” She spotted George on the edge of the growing crowd, and felt a sense of relief, which she quickly squashed. Sure, it would be nice if George could help calm Jason down, but she didn’t need his help. She was holding her own just fine, at least for now.

    “Stay out of this. It’s not your fight,” Jason snapped, noticing him, as well.

    “Why not? Two of my friends are fighting, I can’t try to talk some sense into them?” George inched closer to Tanya, trying to position himself between them.

    “Yes, George. Tanya is your friend, isn’t she?”

    “Oh, stop it, Jason. What’s it to you, anyway?” he asked. Tanya began to slip away as unobtrusively as she could.

    “Don’t you even think of sneaking off! We’re not done with this conversation yet.” Jason called over George’s shoulder. She froze for a second. His tone was just like her mother’s when she got started on a tongue-lashing. Then she deliberately kept walking, trying to pretend she had never paused. It probably didn’t work, but she had to have some dignity.

    “As I said, who are you to tell me what to do? We’re equals, Jason. I will go where I want, when I want, and you can’t stop me,” she said.

    “Oh, can’t I?” There was a dangerous glint in his eye. George moved directly in front of him, blocking his view of her. Again, there was that flash of relief. In the mood he was in, there was no predicting what Jason would do. George had a much better chance of stopping him than she did.

    “Jason, calm down. It’s not that important. Why are you so upset?”

    “Oh, look at the knight in shining armor bravely defending his lady,” Jason mocked, avoiding the question. Tanya blushed, even as she rolled her eyes. That rumor had been going around for ages, and she had no idea why. She and George had never been more than friends, and she would have thought that was obvious.

    “She isn’t-”

    “Of course she is. That’s why the two of you have been stuck together since you met. It’s almost sickening.” Tanya reached the doorway and sat down on a nearby chair. George wasn’t the confronting type, and she was curious to see how he went about it.

    “Jason, just go. You’re tired, I’m tired. It’s been a hard day. Just go, and we can discuss this later, when we’re all more rational.”

    “Oh, look at the glorious mediator. ‘When we’re more rational,’ you say, but when will that be? It’s only your way of reburying a conversation so you don’t have to deal with it anymore.”

    “Why do you always insist on picking fights? Are you just the sort of person who likes to make other people miserable? Is that it? Huh? Is it?”

    “I’m a cynic, George. It’s part of the job description.”

    “Not in my opinion, but you can think what you want.”

    “How kind of you.”

    “Good night.”

    “Hey! Where are you going? We’re not done with this yet!” Jason shouted. George just walked away. Good for him.

    “I am.” And, so far as Tanya knew, he didn’t say a word to Jason for the next two weeks.