SHADOWS OF KAYLA

WHAT A BAD DAY

Kayla.

Why did Rick call dad Dexter? I pondered. More problems seemed to pop from the corners, adding to my worries. Certainly that couldn't be some kind of mistake, or a slip of the tongue. No way.

Did dad lie about his real name to Roderick?

Why?

I watched him slam the door to the house shut as he went in and I almost wept for what my dad had become—Helpless.

I rushed in to see more of what the crazy day had left.

“What the hell was that, Sandie?” He chimed at mum.

“What the hell was what, Joe?” Mom leaned towards him, ready for whatever complaints he had.

“You almost created a scene right there. Do we have to spell out our problems to the whole world?”

“Funny now that your so-called boss, who sees you as a son, is all of a sudden ‘the whole world’." Mom spat, making the quote sign with both her hands.

“Sandie! Why do you have to be so insensitive?”

“You are the one who's insensitive,” she yelled, catching her breath before she added,

“If you continue like this, I'm sorry I'll have no choice but to leave.”

Mum's threat caused dad's eyes to bulge. He walked over to where she was standing and leaned forward.

“Yes…yes, I think that's better. Things will be easier if you were not with me,” dad shockingly agreed.

I felt myself go weak hearing his words, I watched mum lose her balance for a second too as she heard him speak. Her eyes never left his, they were brimming with tears as she caught hold of herself by holding on to the staircase railing.

What was dad doing? What was so important to him that didn't even care whether mum left or not? It was obvious she had said that to get him back to his senses. But his response came as a bombshell. Dad stood helplessly in front of her, silent after what he had said. He was also probably just realising what he had just said.

What is wrong with dad?

I felt so sorry for mum and for dad, I had no idea what was happening. I had been there with them for twenty-three days, but it was like I was just brought into the house that day. I felt so pathetic that they didn't even know I was there watching everything.

“Joe…” Mum's finally found voice quavered. I watched the tears start to drop from her lids as she leaned her weight on the railings, not taking her eyes off the stranger in front of her. No, that wasn't dad. Her chest heaved continuously with pain and I wanted to comfort her. I was hot with invisible tears, feeling miserable at the whole situation.

Dad let out a frustrated sigh and held his face embarrassingly in his palms. I could see how red he was from his ears to his neck. The air was tense as the couple were both having their shares of grief. Watching the two of them sickened me to my stomach.

“I didn't mean it that way, Sandie…” He raised his face and pressed his fingers to his temples, holding his waist with the other hand. Dad turned his face away from mum and sniffled. I could clearly tell he was trying to hide away his tears.

What exactly is going on?

Is it because of me?

I couldn't stop wondering if I was the cause of their problems. I wasn't sure they had problems like this when I was alive…I had been too busy with my life to notice anything.

Mum had dropped to her heels by the time dad started talking again. She held her hand to her chest and let the tears pour as they pleased. Dad shook his head as if to send the approaching tears away, dabbing his eyes with two of his fingers. He crouched next to mom and held her by the shoulders.

“I didn't mean what I said, honestly…I just…ugh…” He dabbed his eyes again and sniffled.

“How did everything change so quickly, Joe?” Mum cried as dad pulled her to his chest where she soaked his shirt with her tears and running nose.

“We were such a perfect family, right?" She mumbled weakly in his chest. Dad didn't say a word instead he patted her hair.

I could feel the tears coming for me too, my body shook a little. I gritted my teeth to stop the anger that was building inside of me as I watched and listened. It was too much of a suffering for me.

“How did we lose our precious daughter? How did she die? Why did it have to be Kayla? What did we do so wrong?” Mum lamented as she wept.

I winced dejectedly at the sound of my name. I was the one making everyone miserable. My fists were clenched tightly, as that was the only thing my meaningless self could do to hold myself.

“And Tom…the poor child doesn't know anything. I'm so evil…” she sobbed sorely and swallowed. Dad said nothing, he was letting her let everything out.

I saw Tom standing up the stairs watching the two in their own bitter world.

Did he hear? Did he hear everything?

I looked up at Tom and inspected the expression on his face with a startled gape. His face was contorting slowly into a confused one. The creases started to show on his forehead as he grimaced.

There was no way I could alert them that Tom was watching. I couldn't. I was pathetic.

“Kayla died?” Tom blurted nervously, startling mum and dad. His chest was heaving up and down, he was struggling to breathe. Tom held his neck with both hands, struggling to let out the air bottling up inside of him.

Mum didn't have time to regret what she had done and sprinted right up the stairs, missing each step before the other. Dad ran quickly behind her, making it right in time for Tom to collapse into his arms.

I ached as I watched from downstairs. It was too much for me to bear. It felt like my chest was clogged with agony and there wasn't any way to keep it out.

Toms heavy breathing was loud enough for me to hear from where I was. Or did ghosts have special hearing skills? I had no idea.

Everywhere went silent for a minute, before mum's shrill cry rented the air again.

“He's not breathing!”