I am the Night - the last She-Wolf

Chapter 10 - A Storm is Coming

For the first time in years, I am bothered by the cold. Icy air stings my skin. Pinching it as if it’s made of sharp needles.

The last thing I remember before darkness took over was the sound of the dirt bikes flying through the snow. I heard gunshots. I felt pain. I couldn’t say what kind of pain because I have gotten so used to it, that it almost turned my body numb to the sensation.

I’m shivering, when I awake. Everything seems foggy. Quiet, but foggy. I don’t know where I am, but I know it’s nighttime. Did we make it? Or am I back in a dark cell?

“Do you even know what you’re doing?” I hear a stranger's voice. It takes me a moment to realize that it belongs to the wolf. “She was right when she said, she won’t make it!” he adds.

“Go! No one is making you stay,” Cillian snaps at him. I wonder how long they’ve been bickering. But the wolf is still with us. Somehow I doubt he’ll abandon us. I like to think it’s because he’s a good person when it’s probably just because he needs us. He needs Cillian.

“She’s dying!” the wolf points out. Me? I am dying? I feel like I am. But that’s nothing new. I’ve felt like that for weeks now. Death always within reach.

“No,” Cillian says stubbornly and I feel him touch me. Pushing the hair out of my face. “She’s tough,” he adds softly.

“What happened to her anyway? Why throw you two in the cage with me? Why was I supposed to kill you?”

“Supposed to? You didn’t want to kill us?”

“Not necessarily,” the wolf answers, “that thing you pulled off me, it was messing with my head. Driving me crazy.”

“They controlled you?” Cillian asks. I can feel him sitting down close by. He gently lifts my head and places it in his lap.

“No one controlled me,” the wolf mutters, “it just drove me mad.”

“Sure,” Cillian sighs in disbelief.

“What did you do to end up in a cage? Did you screw the wrong girl?” The wolf chuckles and I’m sure he’s talking about me.

“No, I just made a mistake.”

“Must have been a big mistake if they wanted you dead. You’re a Hunter, aren’t you?”

“I thought I was, yes,” Cillian sighs, and his fingers run through my hair, “I was wrong about a lot of things.”

“And everything has to do with the girl? What’s her story?” A moment of silence, “her scars-,” the wolf continues, “a wolf did that.”

“Yes,” Cillian answers.

“And she’s alive?”

“As I said: She’s tough.”

“No one is that tough! What aren’t you telling me? Why do they want her so desperately?”

“My blood,” I whisper and they both fall silent.

I manage to open my eyes. We are somewhere inside. A shack maybe. It’s freezing and it’s dark. I can make out the shape of the man sitting across from me. Cillian is behind me. His hand stilled. It drops to his side.

“You’re awake,” Cillian asks softly, “how do you feel?”

“Tired,” I mumble and close my eyes again. “I’m hungry,” I add.

“I found this,” the wolf says and leans over to hand me a piece of dry bread. It’s hard. Frozen. But I’ll take it anyway. “Why do they want your blood?” he asks me.

I shrug and try to move, but a sharp pain in my side makes me wince and lie back down.

“You’ve been shot,” Cillian explains, “We got the bullet out, but you’re... you’re not doing too well.”

“Dying?” I ask, looking down at my body. There’s blood all over. I can’t tell which is mine and which is not. I look hideous. We all do.

“No,” Cillian says softly, “you’re too stubborn to die.”

“Mhm,” I hum, with a soft smile on my lips. I set the bread down. Too weak to eat it. “I think I’m okay with dying,” I say as I close my eyes again.

“I’m not okay with it.”

“Touching,” the wolf sighs annoyed, and I open my eyes again, to look at him.

“What’s your name?” I ask.

“What’s yours?”

“Mika,” I say, “I’m Mika. And Cillian,” I say hoping he knows who I’m talking about. I’m not able to lift my hand to point at him. The wolf takes both of us in before he sighs and nods. Probably more to himself than to us.

“Logan,” he says, “I haven’t said my name in a long time.”

“How long?”

“Can‘t remember,” he says, “too long. But I get why they captured me. But you. Why you? You’re human!”

“Sort of,” I sigh, “I was bitten a few years back.”

“You... that’s impossible!” he says, suddenly on his feet, making Cillian jump too. His hands are ready to reach for his gun. “It’s impossible!” Logan says again.

“Yet, here I am,” I sigh and close my eyes again. I’m so tired. I want to sleep. Forever.

“They wanted her to change,” Cillian continues to explain, “I assume that’s why they threw us in there with you. Threatening me and her life. Trying to trigger something.”

“That’s not how it works,” Logan groans, “stupid humans. They know nothing about our kind! Absolutely nothing!”

“Told you so,” I mumble, making Cillian chuckle.

“Yes, you did,” he says, “guess you were right all along.”

“Always,” I whisper, feeling darkness taking over again.

A thick fog clouds the world around me. Like a blanket covering me, dulling out every sound. Every feeling.

It’s like floating through nothingness. Floating. Not existing. Maybe this is what it feels like to die. Maybe this is death finally taking me with him.

In my dream, I am free. I am running fast, large paws hitting the snowy ground. My lungs expand as I breathe in a steady rhythm. My heart is beating fast while I run.

The forest around me seems sharper. I can see every leave, every snowflake as I fly past it.

The pounding of large paws beside me doesn’t distract me. I know exactly who is by my side. I trust them with my life. They are part of me. Part of my family. They follow me everywhere. To the end of it’s necessary.

I am willing to go there. I am willing to go the length. The wolf howls and with a feeling like snapping a rubber band I am being pulled away. Out of my body.

I can feel the pull. I can see the wolves running. One of them scattering to a halt, while the other two rush past it. It is staring straight at me.

Air leaves its muzzle in sharp huffs. I am right there, but I’m not really. The other two wolves trot back. Wondering what is going on. I can tell, by their body language. But the large wolf looking at me doesn’t move. She doesn’t even flinch a little. She keeps her gaze fixed on me.

I can’t feel the cold anymore. I can’t feel anything, but a strange pull towards the beast. I take a few steps closer. I can’t reach her. I want to, but the closer I’m trying to get, the further she gets away. As if the space between us stretches endlessly.

I groan in frustration. “What is this?” I ask no one in particular.

“You’re in between worlds,” a woman says. I whirl around, trying to make out the source of the voice. There is no one there. Just me. Even the group of white wolves is gone now.

“Who’s there?” I ask, but I don’t get an answer. I just follow a glowing path in the deep snow. “Hello?” I carefully ask again.

“Mika!” someone breathes out my name softly. The voice vibrates with love. It fills me with warmth and a feeling of coming home after a long time away. My name echoes through the trees again. Softly.

I can’t tell where it is coming from, but I want to see the person calling me. I want to be with her. I want her to embrace me and tell me that I’m okay now. I am safe.

“Please,” I whisper, “I just want to come home,” I say. My words are filled with so much meaning, that I don’t even understand half of it. I don’t know what home I am talking about. I don’t know where it might be, but I long for it.

“Let me come home,” I say, standing in the middle of a snowy meadow. The sky above is clear. The moon shines bright. Brighter than usual. It’s calling me. It is breathing new life into my tired bones. Recharging me. Pushing me back into my body. Into the painful reality.

„Not just yet, little Luna,“ the woman says, but her voice breaks, and I can sense her tears.

With a gasp, I jolt upright. I’m covered in blankets. And as I wake, someone jumps to my side, pressing his hand over my mouth.

“Shhh,” he breathes into my ear. Cillian. “Stay quiet,” he whispers, and I nod slowly and his hand drops from my mouth.

In the corner I see a large wolf hovering near the doors to the shed we were hiding in. People yell outside. They found us.

“Can you move?” Cillian asks me, his voice low, “I want you to keep out of the way,” he points to a pile of boxes.

I nod and slowly try to crawl over to hide. I wince at the pain in my body, but I push through it and sack down, leaning against the dusty wooden boxes.

“Door is locked!” Someone yells from outside, “should I check inside?”

“The door is locked. From the outside, dumbass!” someone answers, “how were they supposed to get in, huh?”

“Don’t know. Maybe we should check it out anyway. Their tracks went in this direction.” The voice closer to the shag says. A soft rattle on the door makes me cower, trying to shrink into the shadows. Melt into them and become one with them.

Logan in his wolf form crouches lower, ready to jump whoever dares to enter our little hideout.

“It snowed all night. Their tracks are gone,” the other voice says, “they‘d be crazy if they are still in town. If they’ve gone this way, they must have taken the route over the mountain. We’ll catch up. They run out of gas soon enough and they’ll be slow on foot. The girl was pretty messed up last I saw her.”

“Parker,” I breathe the name with recognition. And something in me snaps. I don’t know how, but I manage to stand up. The man who guarded me. Took me to one torture after another. He even participated in a few himself. And he enjoyed it.

“What are you doing?” Cillian hisses at me as a gust of wind rattles the roof of the shack.

“I think a storm is brewing up,” the voice close by says, “They won’t make it. Let’s head back to the farm, spend the night and wait out the storm.”

I move towards the door, just about to push it open, when Cillian grabs me and pulls me back, his hand over my mouth again. “What are you doing?” he hisses at me, “have you gone mad?”

“Let me go!” I mutter against his palm. My body starts shivering and I struggle against Cillian. I kick out my foot and knock over a metal bucket. The ear-piercing sound silences everything at once.

“Did you hear that?” the voice outside says.

“It came from the shack!” Snow crunching under boots. Someone fumbling with a metal chain. I don’t know how we got into this place when it’s still locked. Maybe through a window.

“Damn it,” Cillian hisses and pushes me behind the boxes I was supposed to hide, “I swear, Mika, you are going to get us killed if you keep this up!”

I lower my head. I know it was my fault they found us. They were about to leave, but something made me want to strangle the man who guarded me for so long. I wanted to kill him.

I didn’t think about the state I am in. I didn’t think I couldn’t do it. I just wanted to tear into him and rip him apart.

“Sorry,” I mumble, and with a gust of wind blowing in fresh snow the doors open wide. Logan doesn’t hesitate. He pounces on one of them. He doesn’t even have time to scream. Cillian attacks the other one. Parker. He knocks him out quickly.

“They will come looking for them if they don’t report back,” Cillian says quickly. He pulls the jacket off Parker and hands it to me. “The storm will slow them down, but we need to move right now if we want to stay ahead of them.”

“What if... what if we turn around?” I ask and he looks at me as if I had lost my mind. “They follow the tracks, right? They know we are here, so, what if we circle back? While they keep looking for us right here?”

“Might be crazy enough to work,” Logan says, putting his clothes back on.

“It’s too risky.”

“A snowstorm in the mountains is too,” Logan counters, “she’s not strong enough to make it through. She slept for two days straight. Trust me, what's waiting beyond these borders is far worse.”

“What?” I ask confused, “we’ve been here for days?”

“We take cover in the storm. With these uniforms they won’t be able to tell us apart from the rest,” Logan continues, “we will just slip through.”

“The border will be guarded. If we climb the walls, an alarm will go off.”

“Is there a way around it?”

“No!” Cillian says, “there is not.”

“But, it’s meant to keep things-,” Logan points at himself, “-out. It’s not meant to keep things inside. There must be a way!”

Cillian glares at him for a long moment, before he shakes his head, “I can’t believe I’m agreeing to this,” he sighs, “the sewers,” he adds, “there’s an outlet... near the gate. We have to climb down a couple of feet,” he points at me, “she cannot climb!”

“How far are we talking?” Logan asks.

“About fifty feet. Give or take.”

“Alright. I’ll take her and I jump.”

“Has everyone around here lost their mind?” Cillian groans, ruffling his hair.

“Can you... can you do that?” I ask, curling my arm around my stomach, “jump that far down?”

“Sure can,” he confirms.

“This is crazy!” Cillian sighs, but I can tell he’s giving in. Maybe this will work. Maybe it won’t, but it’s better than waiting and being captured again. I can see it in Logan's eyes. He wants to prevent that at any cost. I can tell he’d rather die. And so would I.

“I want to try,” I say, reaching for Cillian’s hand. He looks at me, with a torn expression. “I can’t go back there. I... they... the things they did... you saw, Cillian, you saw what they did to that man! I... I need you to promise me if they catch us, you have to-,”

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence,” he warns.

“You have to kill me!” I dare and finish the sentence.