In the life and mind of me

What a life

Well I'm now 9 yeas old and looking back at the past few year my scares have made me who I am f****d up and broken.

I have a scar on my arm were my dad had took his torch and burned my arm to teach me a lesson about touching food without asking even though I asked Mom and she said yes.

I can still feel the heat and the smell of the flames burning my hair and skin off my arm I cried for hours as I laid in my bed I could here them fighting in the next room then dad yelled at my mom and said " I'm taking it b***h rether you f*****g like it or not" then I heard him hit her and she got real quiet!!

I ended up crying my self to sleep the next day I wake up mom had a black and blue jaw and a black eye I think my dad hit her because she stuck up for me.

I asked Mom "did dad hit you because you stuck up for me?" mom said no Brandon he wanted something that mommy would not give up so he r***d me!!

I had no ideal what that was. I do know that I'm older but that's really f****d up! now where was I oh ya so I let it go as if she was ok.

Mom made me food right before I had to run out the door for the bus stop thank God dad was not home or else I would of gotten beat for running one day I'm going to kill him! and make him feel everything my mom and me has had to feel I will not keep doing this!

On the way to school my friend Dan told me how his dad touches his sister down on her down stairs and I thought to my self what the ducks really going on I think he was just trying to make me feel like I was not the only one going through the same hard ship!

I'm glad he talked to me because before him no one wanted to talk to the scared up kid who's always keeps to him self and that says crazy s**t no one ever believes me anyways but Dan did he's been my friend now for years and one day when we get older we are going to own our own boat and call her the dirty b***h funny being a kid and wanting to name a boat something like that right I know!!

The bus pulls up to the school and I go to my first class at that age I just wanted to never be seen and can't wait to get through the day I smell like s**t kids are looking and whispering all around me I want to just snap or cry but God damn if I f*****g cry and my dad finds out I'll get the s**t kicked out of me and if I snap and go off and get kicked out of school the same thing will happen so it's like what the f**k do I do!

Well it's now December 16st and now i have been kicked off the bus so untill Christmas break I have to walk to school witch is five miles to school in the ice and snow IV almost caught frostbite 3 times so far I can't wait till I get older where I can drive and get away from all of this I want to kill my self everyday but I fight and fight I will be 10 September 16 next year to dame slow if you ask me!

I get home from school to find mom bleeding on the floor dad was hitting her with a crowbar over her head over and over I tryed to help but he hit me one time in the head and nocked me out at this point I did not know what the "f**k HAD HAPPENED"!