ChapteTwo
1151 Words
I wake up the next morning to find myself wrapped in his arms.
“s**t,” I grumble. My head feels like it has been split in two.
I get off the bed, moving carefully so he won’t wake upland then I grab my clothes and leave the room quietly.
It’s easier this way. We won’t have to spoil the pleasant memories of last night with an awkward morning-after situation.
It’s meant to be just a one-night stand after all.
***
WHAT THE HECK?!
Now here I am two months after that night, facing the repercussions of first time I decided to let go.
My whole body shakes as I grip the test. Two lines. Bright. Bold. Unforgiving.
The three other tests I’ve tried also show the same bright lines.
“No. No, no, no,” I whisper.
The nausea returns and I rush towards the toilet bowl, making it just in time to throw up what’s left of my breakfast.
I lean back on the wall, taking in harsh, deep breaths as I stare at the ceiling. My right hand gingerly moves towards my stomach.
It’s still flat. Of course it is.
I breathe in a shaky breath, the sound of my heartbeat loud even to my ears.
This can’t be happening. There has got to be a mistake somewhere.
Scenarios flash through my mind. It’s blurry.
I remember myself saying his name, over and over again, like a prayer. But that’s the only thing I remember.
I start to laugh. I laugh hysterically at my life.
Because of course. Of course, something like this will happen to me, just I was starting to think I'm finally in control.
And then my laugh turns into sobs, heartwrenching sobs that echo against the walls of the bathroom.
I’ve never missed my dad more than I do right now.
I walk out of the bathroom on shaky legs and look around the packing boxes scattered all over the floor.
I am supposed to travel to America to study in just two weeks. And now this.
A few weeks after my dad’s funeral, the insurance company called me. I’m supposed to receive the payoff from his life insurance. Two hundred pounds.
I couldn’t believe it. We weren’t that rich. There’s nowhere Dad would have gotten that kind of money.
Not to mention that he was bedridden for the past year and we literally had to struggle to cope with the medical bills and depend on my bartending job to survive.
He must have predicted my reaction as he left behind a letter. He wrote it a few days before he died.
My heart nearly burst out of my chest when I read it. The tears were unstoppable but I was smiling too. Apparently, he had invested in profitable stocks in the past.
He said it’s his biggest wish that I make up for the past two years and go to college. Only if I want to, of course.
A tearful laugh escaped my throat when I read that. My dad was the best.
So I decided to do just that.
I decided to pursue my old dream. To study Business Administration in California.
But now I’m pregnant with and the only thing I know about the father is his nickname that no one knows about.
I spend the next few days indoors, wallowing in self-pity.
My nights are plagued with nightmares of me being pushed of an airplane bound for America with a baby in my arms. And then I dream of dad, I dream my childhood.
I always wake up panting, my clothes drenched in sweat.
And then I make up my mind and make the most terrifying decision of my life. I am going to keep this baby. My dad never abandoned me, and I am not going to abandon my baby.
I will never forget my dream. I can always go to college later.
I ask at the club for Maverick but as expected, no one knows who he is.
It’s terrifying, doing this on my own.
I don’t bother unpacking.
Within the next month, I use a bulk of the insurance money to buy and furnish a cute little studio apartment and use the rest to get everything the baby and I would need.
I might as well just get everything ready now.
You’re really set on a baby-proof place, huh? Most single renters your age don’t ask for that.”
I look at the interior of the apartment.
“Yes, Charlotte. It’s perfect.”
In the two months, I moved in and got a job as a waitress at a three-star restaurant not too far from my studio.
I said it, things are turning up for me again. With my new job, I will be able to save enough till I can work again after delivery. I’m sure i’ll be fine.
I take it back, I’m not fine.
“Arghh.” I groan loudly as I stretch my legs in front of me on the floor of the toilet.
This has become a morning ritual. Me, spending at least an hour in front of the toilet bowl.
I splash cold water on my face. “This is so freaking awful.”
I get ready to go to the hospital, my buzzing restlessly. I’m having an ultrasound for the time today.
I’m going to know the gender of the baby!
I arrive at the hospital thirty minutes before my appointment. Maybe I’m a little too excited.
By the time the nurse calls my name, I’m already bouncing from foot to foot.
The doctor welcomes me warmly.
“It’s your first time, yeah?”
I nod.
She looks behind me, as if expecting someone else to come in. My chest squeezes in a painful pang.
I try not to let any emotion show on my face. “It’s just me.”
“Ohh.” That’s okay.”
Her bright tone saves us from the awkward silence and I feel at ease once again.
“You can relax, you know.”
I wonder if she can hear my heart beating as she smears the gel in my stomach.
I gasp at the sudden coldness.
And then I hear it.
Thump. Thump.
My eyes fill with tears as I stare at the image I can’t understand on the screen.
But what I do understand, however is the sound of my baby’s heartbeat. As clear as day.
This is real. I have a human growing inside me. A baby.
My baby.
I can practically feel my heart swell with love.
“Do you see it?”
She points at a spot on the screen. I shake my head. I don’t see anything.
“It’s okay if you don’t know where to look now. He’ll be easier to spot as he grows.”
My eyes snap in her direction.
“It’s a boy.”
- Writer
