Unspoken

Unspoken Pain Pt. 1

We're still lingering in the past...

Romel watched as Leela left the hospital room that evening. Even watched through the small window of the door Robin confronting Leela, and Leela tried her best to ignore her, to hold back what she really wanted to express. It troubled him, though he wouldn't ever let it show. He wanted to protect Leela, but he just couldn't allow himself to do so, not with so many odds against he.

I can't allow myself to fall in love with her because then I would have to face feelings that I'm not ready to handle, let alone understand why I feel so deeply for this woman. Plus, there's Robin, and I think that's why I keep Leela at arms length, just in case my love and my heart really are still with her. I don't know what to do? I am not a quitter by no means. Maybe leave them both alone and find someone better than me, better for them? Having an in-depth conversation with Leela right now could help, but it could hurt, and I don't want to hurt her anymore than I already have. But I do need to have a conversation with Robin and see where her head is truly at.

Romel continued to think while lying in that hospital. He finally came to the conclusion to stay with Robin, see where things would go, and allow Leela to slowly fade from his memory.

***Fast-forward***

Romel chuckled to himself, "I knew I should've left you alone while I had the chance to. God gave me the chance, but nah. Being with you is going to jeopardize my future plans, and honestly, we're on different levels. With that being said, I don't think we should be together any longer. I wish you the best in all upur endeavors. Thank you for the good times that we were able to share."

Robin slapped Romel, "i***t!" She grabbed her belongings and headed out, slamming the door behind her. But of course, she couldn't leave without slashing Romel's tires before speeding off in her car.

8 months had passed before Romel had heard from Leela. He didn't dare reach out, and as promised, she allowed him to get his affairs in order. He waited another week before contacting Leela, "Hey! It's good to hear your voice. Can we meet up? Just want to catch up," Romel awaited for Leela's response.

"Sure. I'll see you later. 5pm at the park."

Romel tried to hold back his smile and started to get himself ready to meet up with Leela after so long. He put on the cologne that always made her melt. The button-down shirt that she thought made him look so handsome in. He put his glasses on, shaved...he was ready to see Leela.

Leela sat on the bench at the park that seemed to overlook the city, holding a mirror in one hand and red gloss in the other, slowly applying it to her lips. Putting on her favorite perfume again, then crossing her legs. Romel watched her from afar as she gussied up, smiling hard whenever she pushed her glasses up.

"Still pushing up those nerdy glasses I see.." Romel sat down beside Leela, looking out towards the city.

Leela couldn't hold back her smile. "Romel!" Hugging him tight, he embraced her warmly as well.

Romel sighed deeply, "I know things haven't been the greatest between us, and I probably didn't make things easy for you the last time we saw one another. I apologize about that, and I do see how that affected you. I've been done with Robin for some time now."

Leela looked surprised by those words and interjected, "Oh really?!"

"You seem happy," Romel bursted out in laughter while Leela smirked and rolled her eyes.

"Anywho...so aside from leaving Robin, how are things?"

"Well, and you probably won't like this, Kellie started coming around more, and now her and I are together. She tried things out with another guy that I wasn't too fond of as a person, and I guess my pride just wouldn't allow me to let another man have her, so I stepped up to the plate and made her mine."

"Ah, provoked by jealousy..." Leela looked over at Romel, trying hard to control emotions and, most of all, her facial expressions. She thought to herself as Romel continued on. I guess he found the one he's willing to work hard for.

Romel could tell that Leela had retreated into deep thought, "Leela, you okay? What's on your mind?"

Leela gathered herself, her thoughts, her emotions all in one breath, "Aww, I'm so happy for you! That's great."

"You sure you're okay? I know when you're holding back what you truly want to say."

"No, no. As long as you're happy, then I'm happy," but inside a feeling of being overlooked once again set inside of Leela and Romel could sense it, but tried to take Leela's words for truth.

Romel watched Leela's body language, and knowing her like the back of his hand, he could tell Leela was having a hard time processing the new information, crossed her legs, lips twitched before pushing out a smile showcasing only one simple. Romel knew that when both of Leela's dimples showed, she was truly happy or excited, so only seeing one alerted Romel that she was doing her best to remain happy.

He had made his decision. Yet looking into Leela's eyes and almost seeing the sparkle in her eyes immediately disappear, made Romel question himself for a moment, then in an instant, made the resolve to stick with Kellie.

"She's a really great person and friend. It's a nice vibe that we have."

"That's good!"

"Are you seeing anyone?," Romel glanced over at Leela.

"Um...yea...um....yes, just kind of talking, nothing too serious though," Leela looked down at her heels, then up at Romel to meet him with a warm smile.

"Oh really?! That's good then that you've found someone you're interested in..." Romel didn't truly mean that, and even made a fake smiling face that also expressed confusion and uneasiness. "So is it okay that I still call you when I just need a good friend?"

Leela tried hard to hold back her smile, as though everything Romel had just said was void, "Of course you can. I don't like it when we let months pass us by without speaking."

"I know. I just know that any time we're around one another, our feelings are undeniable. But I want to be fair to whom I'm with."

"I understand that. I always have."

Romel and Leela. Friends? Star-crossed lovers? Destined to be? Fated to fail? Romel forced himself not to be in love with Leela, while Leela forced herself to just be happy for whomever Romel was with... even if it wasn't with her. This thing called love is a beautiful disaster for them. Will they ever just let everyone else go and finally be together? Will they learn to communicate their true feelings? So much has been left...unspoken...

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