I love you. Forever.

Chapter 3: Streak of darkness

Warning: Triggers for self harm ahead. 

Rebecca's POV

All three of us had a few classes together after lunch before going our separate ways for the last period. It was a good afternoon. Surprise, surprise...Ben's fan club grew as the day went on. But he stuck to his guns, the only girl he took interest in was little old me. And Matt's afternoon was peaceful thankfully. Ben and I made it our mission to make sure Matt has a lot more good days this year. He deserves it. Other than Tara and Sara being themselves, I had a pretty good day. I didn't even run into my step brother. A win for me. Then there's Ben Wilder. God, every second I spent with him today was incredible. There's no doubt in my mind that I have fallen for him. He is such a special and beautiful person. 

I started my walk home enjoying the nice weather and some time to myself. My walks home by myself help me to decompress from the day and being around so many people for hours on end. I clear my thoughts and just enjoy God's green earth. But of course, that would be short lived today. 

Zach pulled up in his red F150 pickup, Tim bought it brand when he turned 16. I admit it was a pretty truck. "Get in Rebecca." he yelled out the window. I stopped and talked to him through the window that was down. "I'm good Zach, thanks though," I replied with a small smile. I do really try to be pleasant with him. But it's never enough. He hopped out and scurried to the sidewalk standing in front of me. "Get in NOW, Rebecca." He hissed. "Your mom wants us back home right away." he added. "I know Zach, I'll be there in 10 minutes. Just chill out." I said getting pissed. From the corner of my eye I see a classic black Thunderbird pull up and park ahead of Zach's truck. I noticed a handsome boy hop out telling Matt to stay put. Just then Zach grabbed my wrists trying to pull me into his truck. "No Zach! You drive like a crazy person. Let me go!" I shouted angrily freeing myself from his grasp. "You know what Rebecca f**k you, get over yourself. That accident was ages ago. Get over it bitch." He snapped. "f**k you Zach."  I yelled. The bastard had to go there. He just had to go there. 

"Is there a problem here?" Ben said in bold and forceful voice while he gently wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me close into his side and away from Zach. Ben looking like he is about to murder Zach. I never seen him look quite that intense and scary. Thankfully Zach backed off and got back in his truck. "See you at home sis." He hissed at me before speeding off. 

Ben let go of my waist and turned to stand in front of me with his strong hands gently holding my shoulders. "Are you okay Rebecca?" He asked tenderly. His facial expression was soft and gentle again. I saw  a look of worry in his eyes. He gently wiped away a stray tear that had escaped my eye as I leaned into his touch. "I'm fine, Ben." I said with a sad smile. "Zach is stubborn and lives to annoy me. That's all."

It took everything I had to keep myself together. The urge to cut was strong. I can't handle when my accident is thrown in my face like that. I need to get out of here as much as I want to stay in Ben's arms but I need a release, my body is going numb. 

"I gotta go, Ben. See you at 7pm? I asked with a fake smile. I could tell he saw right through me. "Yes for sure, but do you need a ride right now? I promise I'm a safe driver." he said kindly. "I'm ok, ben. I need to walk. It's a awesome car though." I said trying to change the subject. "Raincheck on a ride?" I added

"Of course, beautiful. Call me anytime for anything, ok?" He said. "Thank you, sweetie." I said nodding my head gently. He's sees right through me trying to hold it together. I need to get away just for a few. "No problem, Rebecca:" He said pulling me into a bear hug and kissing my forehead sweetly before letting me go. We said our goodbyes and went our separate ways.

As soon as his car turned, I ran into the woods and collapsed against a big tree. I can't get the images of my dying dad out of my head. All the emotions bubbling up at once. I need control. I tore off my jacket and ravaged through my purse until I found my razor blade; cutting my left arm. Each cut satisfying my urge and need to control my pain. I leaned against the tree with my eyes closed taking in the physical pain and temporality pushing my emotional pain deep into the depths of mind and soul; calming me down. 

I breathe deeply and evenly, regaining my senses when I hear my phone go off.

HandsomeBoy: I meant it when I said to call me anytime you need anything, baby doll. I'm here for you. See you soon.

He's too sweet. I thought to myself as a smile crept onto my face. 

Becs: I appreciate that, handsome. How about I use that raincheck tonight. I'm at 122 Rain Ave.

HandsomeBoy: I'd like that very much. I'll be there for 7pm for you Sweetheart. 

Ben melts my heart. I stayed sitting against the tree for a few more minutes wrapping my cuts with a tissue I had in my purse before putting my jacket on and scooping up my purse and bookbag. I am expected home real soon and I don't want my mom to worry. 

Ben's POV

I saw a streak of darkness in her. He brother really knew how to set her off. That bastard. I'm assuming she was in a car accident before and she's still traumatized or hurting. I saw her try to mask her emotions in front of me but I saw right through her. My heart broke into a pieces when I saw the sadness in her beautiful hazel eyes. They weren't dancing like they were all day today. I will be there for her when she's ready to share her story with me. This girl is so so special. I need to protect her. Take care of her. To love her. Matt pulled me out of my thoughts...

"That Zach is a real piece of work. He's trouble. I don't know how Becca lives with him." Matt said. 

"Yea, I can't believe their siblings." I responded. "They are step siblings. Her mom remarried after her dad died." Matt said sadly. "What happened to him?" I asked. "Rebecca doesn't talk about it. She can get closed off sometimes." Matt explained. "You like her, don't you?" He added smiling. "I do, buddy." I said smiling like a i***t. "I'm glad. I think you'll be good for her. She really has no one to look out for her." Matt said. "Thanks man, that means a lot. She has me now to look out for her." I said smiling at Matt. He's a good guy. We need more genuine people like Matt in this world.