I love you. Forever.

Chapter 16: Battle for Inner Strength Part 2

Ben’s POV

Its been an hour since Becs fell asleep. Mom and dad came in to check on her leaving water and pain meds if she needs it when she wakes up. My dad rested his hand on her head in the most fatherly way. I can see it hurts him just as much as it hurts mom and me seeing my girl like this. “How can anyone hit a little girl.” Dad sighed to himself shaking his head as he walked out of my room. Mom reached over and held my hand that was resting on Becs’ side. “Your dad sees her as his own. We both do, sweetie. We will do everything we can to support her. Her mom will pick her up this evening. They have a lot to talk about.” Mom said teary eyed. “I don’t want her to go back, mom. I don’t trust him.” I said rigidly trying to keep calm. “I know Ben. And she is always welcomed here but only her mom can make those decisions for her. Her mom needs our support too.” She said squeezing my hand. “I will start dinner soon. Let us know if you need anything.” She added. “Thanks mom.” I whispered.

I look down at Becs face still half hidden against my chest and notice the occasional tear escaping her eye as she sleeps. She must be dreaming. “Stay with me baby. Right here in my arms.” I whisper tightening my embrace and kissing the top of her head. A few minutes later I hear Becs mumble something in her sleep. The tears are flowing now. “No daddy, don’t leave me!” She cries out. f**k, she’s having a nightmare. “Becs, baby doll. Wake up.” I say sitting up and shaking her shoulder. “Please daddy.” She cries again. “Rebecca wake up! Please.” I’m shaking her more roughly. Just then she shot right up gasping and sobbing. “You’re okay my love. You’re with me. You’re safe.” I comfort her. She melts into my arms as she catches her breath and calms down. Mom and dad came rushing in hearing her cries and sat on the edge of the bed resting their hands on her shoulders in comfort.

“How’d I get here.” She whispered. “My head hurts.” She reached up to hold her head. “Here baby doll, take this.” Mom passes me the pain medication with her water. She took the pill and looked up at me. I caressed her cheek and kiss her forehead. “I was on my way to your house when I saw you running into the woods. When I found you, you had cut yourself pretty bad. You started crying uncontrollably after that. I brought you  home to get your cleaned up. Dad put butterfly stitches on your cut and I got you to bed. You seemed to be in your own little world the whole time. What happened, Becs?” I said as I rested my hand on her face, drawing circles on her cheek with my thumb.  We all sat on my bed as she told us what happened between her and Tim.

Mr Wilder’s POV

10 minutes after Ben took Becs upstairs to bed.

“Hello Lily. Ben brought Rebecca here to calm down and rest. She is safe.” I said over the phone.

“How is she?” Lily asked distraught. “She’s still upset and unable to talk. We got her cleaned up and Ben took her to rest. Are you okay?” I asked. I needed to make sure she was fine. I haven’t met Tim yet but I do not trust him. How can any man hit a young girl and cause blood shed. My heart broke when I saw her face. She is supposed to be protected not harmed by a father figure.

“I am fine. Tim is staying at a hotel for a few days. He will not lay a hand on my daughter again. He has a decision to make. Either take anger management courses or sign divorce papers. I will not allow him in this house until he has proven himself.” She commanded confidently.

“Good for you Lily. I am glad to hear that. Rebecca is a wonderful girl. My wife and I love her as our own. I know we all want what is best for her and you. Though if it were up to my son, he’d keep her here. He hasn’t left her side at all. I have never seen him so caring towards anyone. He’s always walked his own path and never let anyone close. But he let’s your daughter in his world. He is truly happy.” I said warmly.

“Ben is bringing my old Rebecca back. She’s becoming the carefree and happy girl that she used to be before her dad died. She smiles more and she’s singing again. I couldn’t be more thankful for your son. Ben is a beautiful boy inside and out. I know that given the chance, she would always stay with him too. But I need to pick her up this evening. We have a lot to talk about and I just need to hold her. My baby has been through way too much at her age. I feel like I failed her.” She sobbed.

“Lily, you are a great mother. She is a strong willed girl and will be okay. She has support all around her. Please just let us know if there is anything you and Rebecca ever need. We are here for both of you. You can come earlier for dinner with us if your like.” I offered.

“Thank you for your kind words. I’ll take a raincheck on dinner. I have Zach here. He is trying to take in everything that has happened today as well. I’ll be there around 6pm to pick Rebecca up. Thank you again for everything.” She said before we ended the call. Hopefully her husband will get help he needs.

Becs’ POV

During her state of uncontrollable crying.

I get to my tree in the woods and collapse to my knees before sitting against it. I can’t believe Tim was brazen enough to tare into me about my so called attitude and his problem with Ben, and then the fact that he backhanded me put me in shock. I did not see that coming with my mom in the house. His words cut deep. Why does his opinion of me even matter. Am I still trying to gain his affection subconsciously? I hope I’m not that pathetic. I have no respect or positive views of this man other than he makes my mom happy somehow. And yet his words hurt. Liar, worthless b***h and piece of s**t, trouble maker. Then the whole reminder of me being fatherless. He has to get some kind of satisfaction to say these things to me. I know he only hates Ben because Ben wasn’t afraid to stand up to him and the fact that he makes me happy. I think he hates seeing me happy as well. I don’t get it. I don’t think I will understand Tim and his hate for me.  

I’m jumping out of my skin with my mind racing. I need to cut. I roll up my sleeve and grab the razorblade out of my handbag. I cut myself. It’s deep because that’s how deep his words hurt. I need this physical pain. I need to cut…”Rebecca, please stop.” I hear Ben interrupt my thoughts but I need to cut just one more time. He’s not letting me. He’s begging me to stop. I give in to him as he comforts me and talks me through. But he saw my face now and his voice completely changed. “Who the f**k hit you?” I hear the pain and anger in his voice. I lost it. I’m stuck in my own darkness now. Tim’s words and the feel of his hand connecting to my face runs across my mind on a loop. All I want is my daddy right now. Why can’t he be here with me. Why did he have to die and leave me. I feel Ben picking me up but I’m unable to respond to him anymore. I’m trapped and oblivious to my surroundings. But I’m with Ben, so I’m safe. My head hurts but everything else feels numb. I feel someone cleaning my arm and then my face. I hear voices but do not know what they say. I’m being moved again and my clothes are taken off. I know its Ben. Only his touch brings any kind of comfort even with Tim’s hateful words torturing my mind. I feel coldness pressed against my face and my hand being moved to hold the coldness. Ben is talking to me again. Soon after I feel him wrap his arms around me allowing my to steal his warmth. I can’t stop crying. My head hurts so much with the nonstop reel of hurt and anger caused by Tim. I start picturing my dad. I concentrate on his face as my cries dissipate. I roll into Ben’s chest and breathe him in. I hear him say, “Go to sleep gorgeous. I’ll be right here when you wake up. I love you.” With that I allowed sleep to overtake me. My mind is able to rest but it doesn’t seem to last long. I’m back. Trapped in the car watching my dad die again.

Ben’s POV

“I’m going to kill him.” I hissed after hearing about Becs and that bastard’s argument. “Ben, please. He’s not worth it. I need you calm.” Becs whispered as my parents agreed with her. “I’m sorry baby.” I said trying to be calm. I pull her into me and hug her tight.

“Your mom will pick you after dinner. Tim is staying at a hotel for now. Your mom wants to talk and spend time with you Rebecca. She’s is worried about you honey.” My dad says holding her hand. “Okay, thank you.” She smiled weakly. She looks exhausted. Both mom and dad hug her before heading to the kitchen to finish getting dinner ready.  

She turns to me about to say something but I take her face in my hands and gently kiss her lips not wanting to hurt her busted lip. I rest my forehead on her’s after. “I’m tired, Ben. Why does his words hurt me so much?” She whispered. I hug her tight and rest my chin on top of her head. “I don’t know sweetheart but I do know that nothing he said is true. You are the most honest, courageous, and compassionate person I have ever met. You’re my precious gem Becs. So unique and beautiful. I love you and will continue to love you through all your good and bad days. Please run to me baby doll, for everything. I don’t want to search for you in the woods again. I will though. Always.” I say softly. “I will try Benny. I wasn’t thinking. Everything hurt deeply.” She sighed in exhaustion. “I love you too.” She said looking back up at me. I smiled warmly at her.

“What were you dreaming about Becs?” I asked. I have a feeling I know. “The accident. I dream about it every once in a while. Think everything that happened set it off. I’m sorry if I scared you.” She said tiredly. “You have nothing to apologize for, ever. I’m just glad you’re okay and right here with me.” I say caressing her face. I leave a gentle trail of kisses all over her face avoiding her jaw and busted lip for  last. I ever so lightly give her a feather kiss over her cut and bruise. She closes her eyes taking in my kisses. “I wish you could just stay with me. I want to always protect you my love.” I whispered in her ear before nuzzling and kissing her neck. “I know Benny. I want that too.” She said.

“Dinner is ready!” We heard mom call out from the kitchen. “Let me find your shorts or sweatpants to wear.” I said crawling over her to get out of bed. “You do like to get me out of my clothes, don’t you?” She asked teasing me. “Believe me baby doll, I got no pleasure out of it today. You were completely out of it.” I said handing her a pair of my joggers with a drawstring. “I know, Ben. I just hate that you had to deal with me like that. I’m trying to get better.” She whispered looking down. I pull her to her feet and embrace her tightly. “I know you are my love. We will get there together. I will always have your back.”  We stood there a few minutes as I just held her close.