Bit Broken.

Heavy.

It was the last semester. Now that the summer break was about to start, everyone started enrolling in the big companies for internships. Vijay and I applied for the Malhotra group. Tara went for the Singh Textiles, the company Vijay's father owned. As per the rule, students couldn't do their internships from the companies which belonged to their family.

Papa was in and out of the hospital many times. It was still really difficult. I was hoping I would end up in a bigger company after my degree was complete. I would get Papa to a better set up.

Though I was smarter than Vijay, he was still having a blast during the internship. We were to work in various departments of the company, starting from human resources to sales and IT. Vijay was appointed in the human resources and I was first appointed to the sales department. Well he mostly chilled in the office rooms along with other staffs who were good friends with his dad. I was fetching snacks and coffees for everybody..literally everybody, even for Vijay. I tried pitching my ideas here and there, nobody cared. f*****g bunch of good for nothing oldies.

"Should I talk to dad about it?" Tara wanted to help. She too was having a good time in the Singh textiles.

"No...I'll manage." I denied. I didn't want Tara to get involved in all this. Her nagging was quite annoying sometimes though. I understood she wanted to help but it constantly poked me with the fact that she was privileged.

I couldn't take it anymore. One fine day I finally barged into the king's cabin. I thought Mr. Malhotra would be angry. He wasn't. He had no f***s to give. The day wasn't that fine I guess!

"How are you liking it here?" Mr. Malhotra asked without looking at me. He had his specs on. His vision concentrated on the computer screen. "I would like you to join the company after you get the degree. What new did you learn ?" He uttered casually.

"Getting coffee from the coffee machine. Cleaning the clogged tube and the filter basket..." I blabbered out of frustration in a robotic voice. "It's really fun and it's really funny! I might write a thesis on the espresso machine!"

He finally looked up. He nodded and sighed. "Come to the sales team meeting in the second half."

"They wouldn't allow an intern..." I shrugged. I looked at him, he wasn't joking. He looked damn serious.

"I'll be there. Don't worry." Mr. Malhotra assured. I knew he was being a true businessman. He knew what I could provide. "Just be there."

As the meeting started, I stood in the corner. They didn't allot me a seat. Mr. Malhotra sat in the head end seat. He looked keenly to the opposite wall where the projector was screening all the presentations. All the bullshit ideas. There was nothing original. Every product was assigned the most popular and most expensive designer in the market, also the advertising companies had the same formula for promotion...'A super hot model or actress holding the product in her hand.' I literally stood there biting my tongue watching they present their 'original' ideas. These things had a setting. Everyone had a commission if their ideas pass. When you are long in business, you have to ignore the pattern. But I was new, wanting to break the pattern. Bring something new to the table to these people who had probably lost their taste buds  long ago.

"Miss Tanvi!" The king looked at me. I was s**t scared. "What do you thing?"

"I...I.."I stammered. "I think the ideas are good but won't make us win the race." I gathered my confidence. "This is the age of awareness. Consumers are being conscious in what they eat, drink or wear...Sustainability...That's what we should aim for." I stopped to look at their faces. Of course all of them had a big question mark imprinted on their faces.

"Could you please elaborate? I think many of us cannot follow you." He smiled. His eyes as  if challenging me.

"What I mean is...with the increase in awareness, people are looking for more eco-friendly options. What if we incorporate more such aspects to make an impact in the minds of people. Designing with subtle colors, taking an effort to find toxic free materials for the packaging, advertise to tell people that we believe in what they believe... Also it would be great to incorporate more ESG standards. The government regulations would anyway incorporate that in the following years. We would be way ahead of our rivals. Influence and Impact that should we be aiming for."  I looked back at them. They looked impressed. I just hoped they wouldn't tell me to bring coffees to the table. I looked at Mr Malhotra.

"Impractical...."He casually uttered. I couldn't smile anymore. The smile on my lips was now replaced by the frown on my forehead."What about the prices? Have you given that a thought? We would need more researchers." He smirked. "There is a difference between the theory and the practical. Theorems change as you apply them in reality." He stood up. "For now, let's keep this to here. I would finalize the product in the next meeting." He announced and left the room. I stood at the corner, looking at the faces giving me insulting smiles. I was insulted. I was angry. Very angry. I had a tear film formed in my eyes. It was good for me. It made the faces passing by hazy.

I was in the cafeteria with Vijay in the break time. He was telling me about what he had been doing, playing games, eating good food and fooling around with the other girls. I was slurping my cold coffee hoping it would flush down my anger. The phone rang. I took it out from my pocket,  anticipating it would be Tara. It wasn't. 'The King' it read. I wasn't in the mood to pick up the f*****g phone but I was an intern and he was the boss. He was the one who would put his sign on my certificate. I picked it up.

"Sir?"

"Come to my room."

"Yeah. I'll be there."

"Make it fast."

He cut the call. I won't be his servant...I repeated in my mind. I had promised dad. This is just for the internship. This is just for the internship. I chanted while I went to the fourteenth floor. I'll show him how to run a company with new ideas...I thought. I was really angry and I was imagining stuff. I love how I imagined great stuff when my blood boiled, I know that's human nature but I f*****g enjoyed the scene of the king begging to save him!

"You are good."He uttered. "But this frustration won't lead you anywhere..." He said. I was sitting on the leather seat in front of his huge desk. I looked out of the glass wall. The city skyline and the cloudy sky looked  back at me. "Don't think that I mocked you back there...it was a lesson. You are here to learn right?"

I nodded. I looked around. Finding things to look at. I shook my right foot violently hoping that would curb my anger. The files lied on the desk. Blue, Black, brown jacketed files. The prototype of the product was kept on the table at the other corner.

"You have taught Tara well and you..." He was interrupted by the knock on the door. "Yes...come in."

His secretary, a woman in her thirties, stood in front. She looked kind of exhausted. No wonder she looked drained, the company was a crematorium for talented people. I bet the king didn't remember her name. "Mr. Singh is waiting for you in the lobby." She said. It was Vijay's dad.

"You sit here, I'll be back. I have some things to discuss with you." He said. I nodded and stood up as he went out of the room. I kept strolling through the room. He had a good collection of renowned old literature. The fishes in the aquarium were having a great time teasing each other, the small shark was kept with the golden ones. The goldies ran for their life as the shark hunted them. One of the golden fishes bled, it hid itself behind the oxygen pump. My attention then was captured by the files. One had the product details, the other some upcoming government policies and then I touched something which was to turn the sides of the coin. That file had all the accounts of the company, sales, taxes, returns everything. My hands trembled as I opened the file. My heart pounded wildly as I scanned the document with my phone. My ears were warm with the heat. I could feel my pulse in my throat. I heard the footstep approaching. I quickly scanned the last page and closed the file. I went to the aquarium and pretended to watch the fishes. I was glad to see the golden fishes fighting back the shark. They too could bite!

"I am sorry to keep you waiting." The king returned. "You may go. I'll have the talk with you later..."

I nodded and kept going to the door. My heart was still beating fast. I had stolen something. Something really precious.

"And..."He uttered. My breathing was checked for a moment. "How's your dad?"

"He's ..He's go...good!" I stammered.

"His name's Kishan right?"

I nodded and got out of the room. Dinesh Mathur, my papa's name. He forgot. Again.

That day, as I walked out of the office. Vijay called me from behind. I didn't want to look back to his f*****g stupid face. I had started to learn to tolerate him well but what happened in the meeting and in the room was really pissing me off. I was insulted. I was mocked at. I had stolen some pieces of data of a million dollar company. I was a thief and I was feeling...well I didn't feel bad at all. I was supposed to feel guilty but I felt...how to put it...empowered!

"Do you want to eat something? There's a restaurant...."

"No."

"The Italian is..."He gestured a chef's kiss, "and the cocktails...."

"No."

"What happened to you? You seem..."

"Not today."

"I had something to tell you...would you..."

"Tanvi!" Tara shouted from the car. Ah, it was so calming seeing her face. I ran to her. I turned back to Vijay. "I'll see you tomorrow."

I got in the car. We went to the ice cream parlor. We had a ritual in our internship days. After the office was over. We would get to the parlor, or  stroll through the park, or roam in  the malls and talk about the day. What we did...what we learned...how shitty the day had been for me! Everything.

That evening it drizzled. We sat in the ice cream parlor. In our usual seats. I ordered the ice creams. The Double Decker Tooty fruity. I no longer wanted to get stuck to the plain vanilla.

"How was your day?" She asked digging into the cup.

"Nothing much." I answered. Not looking at her.

"They didn't bully you today right?" She giggled. "I knew if you talked to dad...he would teach them a lesson."

I didn't say anything. I didn't say to her that her dad was the one who picked on me that day. "Will you come to the washroom with me?"

"Sure...what happened? Did your periods start? Isn't it still early?" she kept asking as we reached to the washroom. "What..."

I took her to one of the stalls and pinned her to the wall. I loved it when she wore frocks. Red and white checks. Her hair in a pony with matching ribbons. I kissed her. I tasted the ice cream. The warm and cold breath...leaving me intoxicated each time. "What's with you today?" she spoke in a husky tone.

"Sshh...stop talking." I whispered to her ear and bit it softly. She moaned. My hands went down to her knee and pulled down her pants. I kept kissing her as my fingers went into her. She moaned harder. I kept going in. Biting her tongue. Feeling her all the way to the core. I don't know what was happening. I didn't want her moans to stop. I was enjoying her being so restless...so breathless. I knew I was not giving her pleasure anymore...it was pain...just pain but I just couldn't stop.

"Please...stop."She cried at last.

I didn't care.

"Stop!" she yelled. I tasted her tears as I sucked her lips hard. That made me stop.

"I am sorry." I panted. She sat on the commode. Crying. Hiding her face in her palms. "I am sorry", I repeated.

"What's wrong with you?" She sobbed. I tried holding her in my arms. She pushed me back. I hugged her forcibly this time. "If there's anything that's bothering you....just talk." her voice muffled as her face was buried in my chest.

"I am sorry. I am...." I didn't know what to say. I had lost control to my emotions...my anger. This was the first time...I hoped it was the last time. We didn't talk as we returned home. She still slept the way back keeping her head on my lap. That night it rained heavy.