Her cold Heart

| 9| You did what ?

Izaya’s P.O.V

“You’re unbelievable, you know that?” Kovr barked from the pool chair next to me.

I ignored her, continuing to scroll on my phone. We’d already been out here lying by the pool for an hour, and had been listening to her rant the entire time.

She wanted details about last night but I wasn’t about to give in so easily. I was nursing an earth-shattering headache and trying to make sense of all that had gone on last night in my own mind.

The last thing I wanted to do was delve into all the details with Kovr right now so she could direct and overanalyse the whole thing like she usually did.

“Are you even listening to me?” Kovr shrieked, louder this time and leaning towards me.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about Kovr.” I smiled mischievously at her, never taking my eyes off of my phone.

I knew exactly where she was going with this but I enjoyed irritating her.

I had been giving her excuses all morning. Thankfully, she had been the only one woken up by me sneaking back into the house early this morning.

I could only imagine what my father would have said if he caught me tiptoeing up to my room, dress wrinkled and heels in hand, at 4 AM.

It certainly wouldn’t have been pretty and he definitely wouldn’t have let me off as easily as Kovr did.

I had got her off my back by promising to tell her all the juicy details later on if only she’d let me get some rest.

That lasted briefly. She was at my door at 9AM ready to go out to the pool.

I begrudgingly joined her, but had remained tight-lipped on the whole thing so far.

Truth be told, I had spent a lot of time in bed last night, but none of it sleeping. Elijah, was more than ever expected.

When I ducked out on Toni, I never intended to meet up with the dark and mysterious man from earlier in the night, but lucky for me, I did.

I was reckless , I left the bar with him and went to a hotel, something incredibly uncharacteristic, and incredibly irresponsible, of me.

I wasn’t myself last night though, I was Bonnie. And she was definitely the kind of person to throw caution to the wind and go back to a hotel with a stranger, letting him have his way with her all night.

The guy was even more of a masterpiece up close. A pair of piercing, dark eyes. Dark brown hair just long enough that I could hold onto during our escapades, big strong hands that held me in every position imaginable until the sun nearly came up.

Just thinking about his deep husky voice gave me chills. It was almost too good to be true.

If I didn’t have his possessive marks on my body and the deep soreness in my legs, I would have almost thought I dreamt the entire thing.

I couldn’t exactly tell Kovr all of that though. She was my older sister, after all, and even though I trusted her with the world, I couldn’t imagine what she would think of me.

It couldn’t be any worse than what I thought of myself though. I kept floating somewhere between being ashamed at what I had done and relishing in every detail replaying in my mind.

Bad decisions were kind of my calling card recently, but last night had taken it to an extreme that I was even shocked by.

I knew better than to run off with a guy like that without telling a single soul, and yet I had done it anyway. What if he was a rouge? What if he kidn*pped me and held me for ransom? I didn’t even know the guy’s last name.

What if he had a mate? Or a disease? Goddess, what had I been thinking? There were a million things that could have gone wrong, and it’s a damn miracle that nothing did.

Not to mention, the second he gave me the time of day, it was like I threw every moral I had right out the window.

I left my date with another man, although justified, and practically jumped into this guy’s bed. Better yet, I had let him use me like some glorified, high price hooker.

He took me to a hotel for Christ Sake, and if that hadn’t been enough of a red flag for me, maybe, just maybe, the gun he had strapped to his ankle should have.

He was dangerous to me in more ways than one, but never for one second did I feel threatened or afraid of him.

He was attentive and gentle when I needed him to be, and underneath that tough tattooed exterior, I felt an insane connection with him.

The guy was bad news, exactly the opposite of who I should be associating with right now and yet, if I had been given the chance, I would relive last night a thousand times.

God, the way he had touched me. It was literally like ecstasy. Even his kisses were like nothing I had ever experienced before.

His tongue slid through every inch of mouth as if he was searching for something. His teeth gently tugging on my lower lip and sending me absolutely reeling.

He was dominant and let me know exactly what he wanted, but made sure he was taking care of me. Normally, I would have been put off by someone ordering me around but when he did, I felt weak in the knees.

It was so hot. All night, he pushed the line between pain and pleasure and took me to places I didn’t even know existed.

He held me like he was hungry for me, like he had been waiting for me forever, like if he let me out of his grasp I would slip away forever.

Considering that was exactly what I did, he was probably right to.

“Don’t even start with me!” Kovr threw her hands in the air exasperatedly, ripping back to reality.

“You can’t just come crawling into the house at 4 AM and expect me to not ask questions.

I know you hooked up with someone because you’re practically glowing and you keep getting this cloudy look in your eyes like you’re daydreaming.

What happened?” Kovr persisted. I knew I wouldn’t be able to hold her off much longer, she was starting to get pissy.

“Fine,” I grumbled, giving in only because I loved her. Out of all my siblings, she was my favorite. Especially after Isaac died.

“But you can’t tell a soul.”

“I promise.” She bounced up and down on her pool chair giddily and offered me her pinky. We had been making pinky promises to each other our entire lives.

It was the most sacred of vows you could ever make in our eyes, even to this day.

I smiled, locking pinkies with her and trying to figure out where to begin.

“I met Toni at this really interesting bar across town and...”

“I’m guessing you didn’t hook up with Toni. None of Langdon’s friends are very hot and you definitely have the look of someone who got screwed out of her mind last night.” She smirked, challenging me almost.

“You are disgusting.” I laughed, shaking my head. “But would you shut up so l can tell you the story?” I arched an eyebrow at her.

“Okay, okay. Sorry!” She held her hands up in surrender.

“Anyway, I’m at the club and before I even see him, I notice this guy with a group of friends or something. He’s like, drop-dead gorgeous. Tall, dark, handsome. Tattooed, wearing a button-up dress shirt, like take- my-breath-away beautiful.”

“love where this is headed.” She clapped her hands together.

“We start making flirty eye contact and before I know it he buys me a drink,” I continued.

“He buys you a drink when you’re at the bar with another man?!” Kovr shrieked, interrupting me for the third time.

“At this rate, we’re never going to get to the good part.” I narrowed my eyes at her and she immediately clamped her mouth shut in anticipation.

“Anyway, this was after I left Toni in the diner across. After talking for a while I chose to leave instead of staying with him like I desperately wanted to, I did the adult thing dad would have wanted and walked away from him.”

Kovr arched her eyebrow. “You? Izaya Dumais, doing the adult thing?”

“Don’t look so shocked.” I giggled. “Look the dinner with Toni was actually really nice, he’s just so much more... established than I am. Ready to settle down, you know?”

Kovr rolled her eyes sarcastically. “God forbid.”

Ignoring her, I continued. “So I explained to him I wasn’t ready for anything long term and tried to leave as fast as I could to clear my mind. But somehow! I wound up in the club hooking up with a sexy stranger.″

“You hooked up with someone in the Club?” She looked over her sunglasses at me in a condescending way. So much for her not judging.

“Of course not!” I rolled my eyes. “He suggested we go somewhere quieter, so we did.”

“Which was?” Her words were pointed.

“A hotel,” I admitted reluctantly.

“Oh my God, this is so Pretty Woman! I love it!” Kovr clapped her hands together excitedly.

“Can we choose another movie? I don’t like the p********e reference.” I scrunched my nose up at her. It was as if she was rubbing salt in a wound she didn’t know I had.

“I mean, there’s a hotel in Fifty Shades of Grey, but is that really that much better?” She shrugged.

I bit my lip, replaying a few of the things that he had done to me last night. Fifty Shades of Grey was definitely more on track, but that was one of those things I was going to leave out because Kovr was my sister.

“Does it have to be a movie at all?” I groaned, readjusting myself on the pool chair.

“Yeah, let’s not even go there.” Kovr shook her head wildly, regretting her own insinuation. “So he took you to a hotel and then what?”

I sighed. And then the best night of my life began. “We went upstairs and hooked up. I left this morning, ran into you in the hallway, slept a little bit and now you’re basically up to speed.” I smirked, knowing she wasn’t going to let me get away with that.

“No way! I want details. How was he?” She leaned forward, hanging on to my every word.

“Honestly, Kovr, it was incredible,” I confessed with a sigh. “He was perfect, the s*x was even better. It wasn’t even just that though. He was sweet and charming and it felt like he was genuinely interested in me, not just using me for the night.”

That was the part that had surprised me the most. We had had meaningful conversations in between s*x and he was always checking in on me to make sure I was okay.

He seemed to know exactly what I needed, treating me gently at times but dominating me at others.

“Then why did you leave?” she asked, clearly confused. Honestly, I was. confused too. I left because I panicked. Seeing him in the daylight terrified me.

What kind of person would he think I was? I gave him a fake name and practically threw myself at him, I’m sure he was used to being with girls much classier than that.

The problem was, normally I was classier than that. I had no idea what came over me last night. Part of me was concerned that I wouldn’t be the girl he thought I was in the morning.

I had done things with him I never even dreamed about before, Maybe I walked out because it was the most intense connection I ever had with someone, and I left before anything could happen to taint the memory for me.

I wanted it preserved a certain way in my mind forever.

“It was just a one night thing,” I told Kovr, trying to hide the defeat in my voice. The reminder was as much for my own benefit as it was for her.

What happened last night certainly couldn’t be repeated, we had both agreed on that, and it was for the best.

“And you’re okay with that? You seem really into this guy. And if he’s as great as you say he is, maybe once isn’t good enough.” I hated that she was right.

Once would never be good enough, but I had to live with that. “It doesn’t matter what I want now, Kovr. I agreed to a one-time thing.

That’s all it was. That’s all he wanted.” I shrugged.

“Did he actually come out and say that’s all he wanted?” she inquired with a knowing look in her eyes.

“Not exactly, no. But guys like that...”

“Izaya, I swear to God, I am going to murder you.” Nadia’s voice rang out from the house as she came out towards the pool.

“Damm it. Hide me.” I groaned, putting my magazine over my face and sinking low into the chair. I certainly wasn’t equipped to deal with the wrath of my sister right now.