Man Down

Chapter Seven. Regret

Chapter Seven

Regret

Kristen had woken up to the blinding sun shining into Dawn’s room, an excruciating pain pulsed through her head. The sound of birds chirping outside was deafening and the pain pulsed harder. Suddenly she felt something twitch under her head, she turned her head to see Sky sleeping right next to her. His arm was extended out beside him, and her head was resting on it, his other hand resting on her thigh. She shot up and felt a wave of panic shoot through her entire body. Different scenarios were going through her head, how far had they gone? This was a horrible idea, she meant for self-destruction last night not permanent self-sabotage. she needed to leave, maybe he blacked out as well. She hoped they all blacked out as she did last night. That may have been wishful thinking, at least for Patty. This seemed to be a norm for her. Kristen had planned to sleep at Dawn’s another night to avoid the grey cloud that hovered over her house, but that plan went out the window and so did she.

She did the walk of shame back at home, the previous night she walked with such fury and now this morning the walk back was a sullen one. She crossed her arms, hugging herself. She could not believe what she had done, what she had made him do. She felt this was completely her fault, had she just stayed home none of this wouldn’t have happened. What about Elise? Kristen cared a great deal for Sky, the thought of him losing the girl he seems to love and seeing him hurt sent a sinking feeling in her chest. It would be her fault. She felt her lips begin to tremble; her vision blurred as tears formed. she had ruined her new friendships within the first two weeks. She quickened her pace, her lip was shaking, heavy sobs were coming.

She entered her house and tried to bypass her mother in the kitchen, she knew if she saw her face she would begin questioning. She also wanted to avoid her dad; he would be furious with her for taking the beer. As she walked past the living room, she noticed the grey area rug was missing, she thought it was weird but didn’t put too much thought into it. She walked quietly down the hallway and slipped into her room, she plopped herself onto her bed. She had attempted to fall asleep but the pain in her head was still too present to allow any resting. She went into her closet and grabbed a new pair of pajamas and headed out of her room, she stopped in the kitchen to grab a drink from the fridge. She turned to face her mom who had been washing the dishes.

“Since when do you do the dishes?” Kristen asked her mom.

Her mom jumped and spun around to look at Kristen, she was pale and wide eyed.

“Sorry geez.” Kristen said closing the fridge and beginning to walk out of the kitchen.

“Sorry,” Kristen’s mom began “I’m a little rattled this morning.”

“What happened?” Kristen was concerned for her mother; she had never seen her like this before.

Her mom sighed and looked down at her feet. “Last night your father came home at around eleven and he began packing his things.”

Kristen’s heart sank, “what do you mean?”

“He told me he had met somebody else, and that he was leaving with her.” Kristen’s mom was holding back tears, “he wanted a divorce.”

Kristen’s world crumbled below her feet; she felt an intense weight in her chest. How could this have happened? This place is cursed. She stared too stunned to respond to what her mother had just shared with her. She turned and walked down the hallway towards the bathroom, she locked herself in there and ran a bath. Her phone began vibrating on the vanity, she picked it up and saw sky’s number calling. Now guilt had joined the party once again, she turned the phone off and sank into the steaming tub. she dipped her head into the hot water, it relieved the throbbing pain. She sat there with her eyes closed allowing the water to envelop her, it comforted her and for a second the weight of all the events that had transpired just in this one morning had lifted off her shoulders. She felt horrible for ignoring Sky’s call, but she could not deal with that right now, that problem seemed so small now compared to what she had just happened to her family. How could her father leave her? Her heart was broken into a million tiny pieces, she felt betrayed. She felt worthless. She chose this homewrecking tramp over his own little girl. How could he? She let out quiet sobs.

She sat in the tub for hours, the water got cold and her skin incredibly pruned. It was not comforting anymore, she drained the water and stepped out of the tub. she grabbed the white fluffy towel off the vanity and wrapped it around herself. She stared at her mascara-streaked face in the mirror, she splashed her face with some water and wiped the rest with a makeup wipe. She looked over to a shelf where her and her mom had kept various skin care products, but she did not have the energy at the moment. She quickly put on her pajamas and plopped her hair up in the towel. She exited the bathroom and went straight to her room; she fell into her bed. She laid there for a moment until pulling the covers over herself, she had begun to drift off into a sleep.

When she awoke the towel, she had wrapped her hair in was twisted around her head, she unwrapped herself and looked towards the window. The sun was still shining bright outside, she turned on her phone to check the time. It was three in the afternoon, there were seven missed calls from Sky, eleven missed calls from Dawn, and too many text messages from Patty to count. One of the text messages was from Sky on Patty’s phone, he must’ve thought she blocked him when she turned off her phone.

Kristen it’s Sky, please answer the phone. I just want to talk…

She read the text over and over again. She could not talk to him right now, but she felt horrible. She needed to find out what happened, so she called Dawn.

“Kristen!” Dawn answered, “what happened we’ve been so worried!”

“I know I’m so sorry, I freaked out and left.” Kristen responded

“Sky has been trying to talk to you all morning,”

“What happened last night?” Kristen interrupted.

“Nothing.” Dawn began “well not nothing, but not what you think.”

“What do you mean?” Kristen asked.

“Well, you were pretty intoxicated and so was Sky,” she began “you guys were dancing and then you kissed, you guys then fell asleep on the floor together, but that was it.”

“oh”

“Yeah, you didn’t have to leave.”

“Actually, I did.”

Kristen began telling Dawn what she had found out when she returned home, how her dad had run off with some girl he had met and that he had been cheating on her mom. She explained that that was why she turned off her phone, she didn’t have the energy to deal with Sky after all of that.

“I’m so sorry Kristen.” Dawn responded.

Kristen heard the sadness in her voice.

“it’s ok,” she began “not your fault.”

Dawn was silent for a moment, they both sat in the awkward silence for a few minutes.

“Are you going to talk to Sky?” Dawn asked.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea, I couldn’t handle that kind of rejection right now.”

“I don’t think it’s that kind of talk.” Dawn chuckled “I can tell her likes you, and I would much rather you over Elise.”

“You really think he likes me?”

“Oh yeah I can tell,” Dawn said, “it would be a good distraction.”

“I guess you’re right, yeah I’ll get ready and go talk to him.”

They said goodbye and Kristen began to get dressed, she threw on a pair of leggings and an oversized white hoodie. She put her hair up in a messy bun and put a white headband to match her hoodie. She threw on a bit of mascara and headed out of her room and down the hallways towards the front door. She found her mom washing the floors in the living room. She was reminded of the missing rug.

“where’s the rug?” she asked her mom while putting on her shoes.

Her mom stared at her with a pale expression.

“I had to throw it away, after your father left, I spilled wine and couldn’t get the stain out.”

“oh” she began “makes sense, you know I’m here for you right mom?”

Her mom smiled at her but continued washing the floor. Kristen walked out of the house, despite all that had happened she was excited for her talk with Sky. She walked down the road and made it to Sky’s. she stood at the end of his driveway and took a deep breath, she walked up the path beside his driveway that led to the front door. She braced herself and knocked on the door. She heard footsteps heading towards the door, it swung open. It was Sky, he glanced at her and then looked down at his feet. He moved aside letting her enter the house. His home was much homier than her parents and Dawn’s. it was the same layout as the other houses, but there were dark brown hardwood floors, and the walls were painted a coffee brown colour. The living room had brown leather couches and the walls were filled of family photos. Pictures of little Sky fishing and playing in the snow. Barely any of them were staged, they were real happy family moments. It was sweet and cozy. She turned to look at Sky, he was still looking down at his feet. She felt uneasy, his body language didn’t tell her this was going to be a pleasant conversation. She followed him to his room. His bedroom was painted a navy blue and was quite plain looking. He had grey carpeted floors, an overflowing laundry hamper, a flat screen tv, and a gaming system under the tv on a tv stand. they both took a seat on the end of his bed. They sat in silence for a moment, not knowing who should speak first.

“You look nice.” He said still not making eye contact with her.

“Thanks,” she replied, “what did you want to talk about?”

“Last night.” He said looking down at his hands.

“Ok?” this didn’t seem to be going the way she had hoped.

“I care for you a great deal, but last night can never happened again.” He said finally looking up at her. ​

Kristen just stared at him. Her heart shattered again. She cursed dawn in her mind for giving her false hope. She didn’t need this right now. She stood up and headed for the door, sky grabbed her arm gently.

“don’t touch me!” Kristen snapped, tears flowing down her cheeks.

“Kristen I’m sorry.” He said, reluctantly letting go of her arm.

She ran down the hallway out of the house, Sky followed behind her but made no effort to stop her. He followed her down the driveway. Kristen quickened her pace, she waited until she passed the neighbouring house to look back. He was sitting on the curb watching her leave. She could not believe the day she had been having. Never again.