FORBIDDEN MOONLIGHT

CHAPTER 17: Forbidden Words

The tension in the cabin had grown unbearable, a silent, oppressive force that seemed to weigh down on both Ethan and Lyra. For days, they had danced around their feelings, pretending they could maintain the boundaries they’d set, but each attempt to keep their emotions in check only made the pull between them stronger. It was as if they were magnets, drawn together by a force neither of them could control, yet both were desperately trying to resist.

As the sky outside darkened with the approach of a storm, Lyra could feel the pressure inside her mounting, an almost physical sensation that made it hard to breathe. She moved through the kitchen with a tense energy, her every action sharp and deliberate as she tried to focus on anything but the man sitting across the room. But it was impossible to ignore him, impossible to block out the awareness of his presence that had become a constant thrum in her veins.

Ethan sat at the small table, his gaze fixed on the map in front of him, but Lyra could tell he wasn’t really seeing it. His brow was furrowed, his jaw clenched, and there was a tightness in his shoulders that spoke of a struggle within him—one she recognized all too well. He was on edge, and she was too, both of them coiled tight as springs, waiting for the inevitable moment when they would snap.

Finally, Lyra couldn’t take it anymore. She slammed the knife she’d been using onto the counter, the loud thud reverberating through the quiet cabin. “Ethan,” she said sharply, the sound of his name cutting through the tension like a blade. “We need to talk.”

Ethan’s head jerked up, his eyes locking onto hers with a fierce intensity that made her heart stutter. For a moment, neither of them moved, the air between them crackling with an electric charge. Then, slowly, Ethan rose from his seat, the movement deliberate, controlled—yet she could see the storm brewing just beneath the surface.

“What is it, Lyra?” he asked, his voice low and rough, barely masking the turmoil within. He took a step toward her, his gaze never leaving hers, and she could feel the heat of his presence, the way it drew her in despite every rational thought telling her to stay away.

Lyra clenched her fists at her sides, her nails digging into her palms as she fought to keep her voice steady. “We can’t keep doing this,” she said, the frustration in her tone matching the tightness in her chest. “We can’t keep pretending like there’s nothing going on between us.”

Ethan’s jaw tightened, his expression hardening as he took another step forward, closing the distance between them. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said flatly, his voice cold and controlled, as if he could will away the truth by sheer force of denial.

But Lyra wasn’t backing down. She couldn’t—not when the truth was staring them both in the face. “Yes, you do,” she countered, her voice rising with a mix of anger and desperation. “You feel it too, Ethan. I know you do.”

His eyes flashed with something dark, something dangerous, and Lyra’s breath caught in her throat. He was close now, so close that she could see the tension in his muscles, the way his hands were clenched into fists at his sides. It was as if he were holding himself back by sheer will, fighting an internal battle that he was losing, inch by inch.

“I can’t feel anything,” Ethan bit out, his voice sharp, almost a snarl. “I don’t have the luxury of letting my emotions get in the way. You need to stop pushing this, Lyra. It’s not going to change anything.”

The words hit her like a slap, and for a moment, Lyra felt the sting of rejection, the ache of knowing that he was denying what was so obvious between them. But there was something in his eyes, something flickering just beneath the surface, that told her he wasn’t being honest—not with her, and not with himself.

“Why are you lying to me?” she demanded, her voice trembling with the intensity of her emotions. “Why are you lying to yourself?”

Ethan’s eyes blazed with a mixture of anger and frustration, and he took another step closer, his proximity sending a shiver down her spine. “I’m not lying,” he insisted, his voice tight with barely contained emotion. “I’m protecting you. I’m protecting us.”

Lyra shook her head, her heart pounding in her chest as she stared up at him, her own anger flaring in response to his denial. “You’re not protecting anyone, Ethan! You’re just running away! You’re scared, and so am I, but we can’t keep pretending that this isn’t real.”

Ethan’s jaw clenched so hard she could see the muscles jumping beneath his skin. He was breathing hard now, his chest rising and falling with the effort to maintain control. “You think this is easy for me?” he snapped, his voice rough, almost a growl. “You think I don’t feel it too? Every time I’m near you, it takes everything in me to keep from—” He broke off, his fists clenching tighter as he struggled to rein in his emotions.

Lyra’s heart ached at the raw honesty in his words, but she couldn’t let him shut her out, couldn’t let him push her away just because he was scared. “Then stop fighting it!” she urged, her voice trembling with the force of her emotions. “Stop pretending like you don’t care, like you don’t want this as much as I do.”

Ethan shook his head, his eyes hardening as he took a step back, putting distance between them. “It doesn’t matter what I want, Lyra,” he said coldly, though his voice wavered ever so slightly. “This isn’t about what we feel. This is about what’s right. And what’s right is keeping you safe, keeping us both focused on the real danger out there.”

Lyra felt a surge of frustration, her emotions bubbling over as she stepped forward, refusing to let him retreat. “And what about the danger in here?” she shot back, her voice sharp as she gestured between them. “What about the fact that this—whatever this is—could destroy us if we keep trying to ignore it?”

Ethan’s expression twisted with something close to anguish, and for a moment, she thought he might finally break, might finally admit what was so obvious between them. But then he hardened again, his resolve steeling before her eyes. “We’re stronger than that,” he said, his voice firm but strained. “We have to be. We can’t let this… distraction… get in the way.”

Lyra’s heart twisted at the coldness in his tone, but she wasn’t ready to give up. She couldn’t. “Ethan, please,” she whispered, her voice trembling. “Stop hiding from me. Stop hiding from yourself.”

For a moment, Ethan looked like he might crack, like he might finally let the walls he’d built around himself come down. But then, with a visible effort, he straightened, his expression hardening into something unreadable. “I’m not hiding,” he said flatly. “I’m protecting you, Lyra. And that’s all there is to it.”

The words felt like a final blow, and Lyra felt the fight go out of her, her shoulders slumping as the reality of his denial settled over her like a heavy weight. She could see the truth in his eyes, could feel it in the air between them, but he was too stubborn, too afraid to admit it, even to himself.

“Fine,” she said quietly, her voice hollow. “If that’s how you want it.”

Ethan’s expression softened for just a moment, a flicker of regret passing through his eyes, but it was gone before she could fully grasp it. “It’s the only way,” he said, though his voice was barely more than a whisper.

Lyra nodded, though her heart was breaking. She could see the conflict in him, the way he was torn between what he felt and what he believed was right, but he wasn’t ready to face it. Not yet.

As the storm outside finally broke, rain pattering against the windows, Lyra turned away, her chest tight with the weight of everything left unsaid. She could feel Ethan’s eyes on her, could feel the tension still thrumming between them, but she knew that nothing had been resolved. They were still standing on the edge of something dangerous, something that could either destroy them or bring them closer together—but for now, they were both too afraid to take that final step.

And as she retreated to her room, the distance between them feeling like a chasm, Lyra couldn’t help but wonder if they would ever find a way to bridge it—or if the emotions they were both so desperate to deny would tear them apart before they even had a chance to find out.