The Teacher's Secret

Chapter 5

“No, Gary,” I answered firmly. “I am not getting back with you! I don’t even know why you are making this suggestion.”

“Why not?” Gary asked as he moved closer to me and I took a step back. I wanted him nowhere near me.

“Because I gave you enough chances and you blew them!” I yelled becoming angrier by the minute. “I am not going to give you the opportunity to hurt me like you have done.”

“Calm down, Alison,” Gary said.

“How dare you!” I yelled. “Listen, you have no damn right coming up in here telling me to calm down. You made your decision. You want pretty young things and pretty young thing you got. Certainly you don’t want an old woman like myself who is not hot and fancy like your new love.”

“Alison, I’m sorry I…” he began but I held up my hand and started walking towards the door only to turn back and stare him squarely in the eyes.

“Sorry? You’re sorry? After everything, ten years of marriage, so many things we have been through together and you are sorry?” I yelled. “And you could get up one day and decide that I wasn’t good enough? No, Gary, I’m sorry. Sorry I spent a decade of my life going through thick and thin with you. Sticking by you. Supporting you. Being there. Doing everything I knew how to make you happy. So don’t come up in her telling how sorry you are! You know what Gary? I think you had better leave.”

“Ok,” he replied with quite a sad look on his face.

He walked to the door where he stopped and looked at me. “I’m truly sorry. If you give me another chance I promise to be the best man you ever met,” he said.

“A little too late for that now, Gary. Goodbye,” I said as I turned my back.

I heard the door close and I felt the tears gathering in my eyes. I blinked rapidly. There were many days that tears had drowned me. At other times, I could not even roll out of bed. Depression had sat on my shoulders like an anvil. Suicide had stopped by and nearly won me over. I was lucky to have had my friend Francine by my side, for the worthlessness I felt was like none I had felt before. Maybe he wanted the child or children that I was not able to give him which made him seek it outside of our marriage. I don’t know, but when I confronted him about this woman whom he was seeing, he had flatly refused to stop seeing her and I was furious, for it had not been the first or second time. And to add insult to injury, he had thrown disrespectful, abusive things at me. It was more than I could bear so I had filed for divorce. It’s quite ironic to see him coming here today to grovel and ask me to take him back.

I did not want to cry again but I could not help it. I allowed the tears to pour out of me in choking sobs. After a few minutes, the tears subsided leaving me feeling drained.

I was definitely at a better place in this whole divorce thing but the anguish I felt today was showing me just how hurt I was and it made me wonder yet again if what I felt for Jade wasn’t some way of showing Gary that I could get someone young too. Maybe my vulnerability was showing. Maybe I was not really in love – just infatuated with someone who had given me a reason to smile when I was nursing a broken heart.

I shook my head. No, I have never experienced these emotions before. I have never had a spark pass from a man to me and I have never been so turned on my any man’s scent, not even Gary’s. No, this was not just my vulnerability and my hurt and my frustrations or even my pain; it had to be more than that. It’s like the universe was trying to tell me that Jade is my special love, my forever love. I wondered why though, for I was thirty-eight and he was a mere eighteen years young. Nevertheless I was prepared to see where this led and prepared too to fight for him. Nobody was going to stand in my way as long as Jade says he wants to be with me too.

I was a little agitated and my cure for when I felt this way was to take a long nap but I was quite sweaty from my afternoon workout. I had returned from my session at the gym to find Gary waiting for me. He was really a piece of work: the audacity of the man! Did he think he could come over here to appeal to my forgiving nature so that he could get back together with me? Well he thought wrong.

I stripped and entered the shower, allowing the water to cascade over my body. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths of my Bath and Body Works Aromatherapy calming body wash as I lathered my body. I was going to wash away these negative feelings and concentrate on positive things. As I washed my body, I began to sing; singing has a way of helping to calm me. I switched off the shower and dried myself with the very fluffy towels I had yet again ordered from Macy’s.

Having dried myself, I sauntered out the bathroom to my bedroom, my little haven. I walked over to my dresser and took a closer look at myself. “You are a beautiful woman and you deserve to be happy,” I pointed out to myself in the mirror.

I took a match and lit the two large candles and two smaller ones that were on my dresser. I had bought these specially made candles that would out when they reached a special line.  A fruity aroma mixed with vanilla wafted through the room adding to the comforting effect my body wash had on me. My bed was like a cloud and soon I was drifting off to sleep.

I found myself lying seductively on my bed wearing one of my lacy lingerie watching as Jade walked towards me. He was wearing a low riding jeans, a cowboy hat that he had pulled low over his eyes, and no top. I liked the way his relatively flat and defined abdomen had the finest trail of hair that disappeared into his jeans. I wanted to reach out and follow that trail with my tongue. Music filtered into the room and shimmering colourful lights flickered all over the room. Jade began to gyrate slowly, his thumbs stuck in the loops at the front of his pants. He looked so darn sexy that I scooted to the edge of the bed so I could possibly run my hands down his abdomen. He danced his way over to me and straddled me. I made an attempt to touch his abdomen but he removed my hands.

“Naha,” he said playfully. “No touching the merchandise.”

I obeyed him and he continued by grinding his hips into mine. I thought I would have died of neediness. He came off my lap and slid across the floor, all the while doing some type of dance that made me feel as if I needed to go and get my purse and throw some money at him. I didn’t know Jade could dance like this but I was definitely not complaining.

When he came back over to me, he stood in front of me, took my hands and placed them on his abdomen. I just loved the feel of his skin beneath my fingers. Jade’s belly was firm but still had an amount of softness to it. I ran my index finger along the trail of hair and stopped at the waist of his jeans. I could clearly see a sizable bulge in his pants and I wanted to see it for myself so I proceeded to undo his button and unzip his pants. Jade held on my hands yet again, preventing me from going any further. He pushed me so that I fell onto my back on the bed. He lowered himself onto me and I gladly opened my legs to welcome him…

I groaned miserably and squeezed my legs together. This had got to stop. These dreams were driving me insane. I want Jade in my bed and I wanted him now. I rolled onto my back and ran my hands over my body.

“Oh Jade, I need you so much,” I whispered in the semi-darkness. The candles were out but their fragrance still lingered in the air. Only the night light remained.

My left hand found its way over to my breast. While I kneaded the globe, I imagined Jade’s hands there. My hands travelled down my body and thought of the pleasure Jade could be giving me right now. When my hand found its way to Lady Yumyum, I was not surprised to find her warm and slick from the dream I was having. My fingers slid in and out repeatedly as I arched my back and silently called out to the universe to send Jade to me. My soul had found the one whom it loves but he was not here with me. Instead, he was somewhere else, loving someone other than me. My orgasm was upon me and I relaxed my body and allowed the sweet waves to wash over me.

------

It was only nine o’clock so I knew Fran would not be sleeping just yet.

“Fran, I’m telling you, I feel like a little nymph,” I was saying to Fran a minute later.

“You want a man, Al, not a boy,” she replied. “You want a man with experience not a boy who may not even know what he is doing.”

“That may be so but I am willing to work with Jade,” I responded. “I can teach him how to love me. After all, I’m a teacher, right?”

“Yes, you are,” Fran laughed. “And a good one too.”

“Girl, David is home,” Francine said. “I have to go. We’ll talk soon, ok?”

“Ok. Later hun,” I said as we both hung up.

I looked at my phone trying to decide whether or not I should text Jade but that decision was made for me when my message ring tone chimed.

Hi Ms

Hey Jade…sup?

Im here. hru?

Not so good

Y?

Well, I think I need some tlc (blush emoji)

Sml…I know where you could get some

True? (smiley face)…where?

Well…u know if I tell you I would have to kill u after, right? (grin emoji)

DWL…so Jade do you want to play a game with me?

Depends

It’s called 30 things in 30 days….starting today, I share something about myself and you share something about yourself. In that way, we get to know each other a little better. Are you game?

Alright. Sure

Great, so I’ll start…I love long walks on the beach

Nice…for me, my favourite colour is red and I like blue too.

Jade and I spent another twenty minutes texting, talking about a variety of things which eventually led to a little flirting. I wore a big grin for most of the time we were texting and even blushed a couple of times. Jade seems to be an expert at flirting which was quite surprising seeing that he was only 18. I began to think that with all this flirting he may just be more than a mere boy as Fran had suggested. I was immensely happy to see that Jade might just be interested in me after all.

-Jade-

I sat there looking at my phone and scrolling back through the messages between me and Mrs. Clarke. I smiled sheepishly at the messages. The flirting between us was great, although it was not for long. I liked the way she was natural and plain and her flirting skills were, honestly, very on point. She matched me toe to toe. I was definitely looking forward to knowing more about her in this little 30-things-in-30-days game.

Speaking of game, it was time for me to log into Doom Eternal. As I logged in, my friend Fabian started chatting with me.

“Dude, where have you been?” he asked. “You’ve been missing all the action.”

“Man, I’ve been doing things I’m not supposed to be doing,” I grinned.

“Like what?” he asked.

“Suppose you had a grown woman interested in you, what would you do?” I asked.

“Dude…” he drawled. “I once had a woman do some things to me I ain’t gonna tell you!” he grinned.

Before I could respond, my father entered the room. From where he stood, I could smell the alcohol on him. My shoulders tensed along with my entire body.

“Fabian, I have to go,” I said and disconnected.

My father stepped further into my room, his steps faltering a few times.

“Jade,” he said, his speech a little slurred. “Why did you not cut the yard like I told you to?”

“I don’t see why I have to cut it, dad” I answered.

“What did you say boy?” he retorted.

“I said…” I started, but by this time, my father was in my face and his hands roughly grabbed me by the front of my tee.

I stood there looking at him, not sure what I should do. I took a deep breath and looked into his haggard face. The constant drinking had taken a toll on his once handsome features. The lines there told a story of recklessness and stress. I felt sorry for him. I truly wished that things didn’t have to be like this between us.

“Dad, let go of me,” I requested quietly.

“Or what, Jade?” he challenged me. “I said why did you not cut the yard like I told you to?”

“And I said I don’t see why I have to, dad,” I retorted. “I feel like I have to do everything around here. I am tired and I am not gonna be cutting the yard no more. You can do it.”

I felt the sting of his rough hand as it smashed into my face.  I was in disbelief. My father had never struck me before. I felt an outrage I had not felt before. I felt as if all the blood were rushing to my head making it swell like a helium-filled balloon. With might I did not know I had, I forcefully removed my father’s hand from my tee and shoved him. Though he was half drunk, his aim was not off; his fist caught me squarely on my jaw bone which had both of us tumbling to the floor. I punched him back in the face and a tussle ensued. I don’t know how long we were there but I heard when my mother and sister enter the room yelling frantically for us to stop. My mother and sister were able to pull us apart. At that moment I felt tears sting my eyes. I did not bother to stay in the room. I grabbed my cell phone and dashed from the house.

I started to run in any direction that suited me. I did not know where I was going but I had to exorcise this anger out of me. It was eating me alive and I did not want to be consumed by it.

I stopped when it seemed as if my chest would explode. I started walking towards a park I saw close by. I sat on a bench to catch my breath. It was then that I allowed the tears to fall. I was seriously tired of my father and his crappy ways. I could not wait to get out of that house. I would ensure that I did exactly what I needed to do to get a scholarship to a college far far away.

I leaned back on the bench and looked around. The Manda Bridge was ablaze with its twinkling lights but tonight it brought me no joy. I thought to myself that I would have loved to live in one of those apartment buildings in this area. I am sure that its tenants often found solace in its beauty.

One thing was certain is that I didn’t want to go back to that house tonight. I didn’t want to be anywhere near that ogre but what would I do? Where would I go? I was certain that I could not sleep at Jess’ house and Fabian’s house was too crowded for my liking. I sighed searching my brain for who to call. Who would put me up for the night? And then it hit me: Mrs. Clarke.