Falling for the nerd

Chapter eighteen - Maybe I am falling

Elle's POV:

Lately, Alex is different. I don't know what is going on with him, but I like this version more. The shy one will always be my favorite. He thought that I was sleeping and kissed me. Well, not a real kiss, but I still liked it. I won't tell him that, because he might think of something else and I promised myself that I will go slowly with him. If I have to be honest, I won't deny going out with him. Is it possible that I like Alex? Probably I am imagining things. Moreover, just because he kissed me doesn't mean that he will do it again. I need to think about something else. 

As usual, I woke up and got dressed. I am in a good mood so I dressed up a little bit better. I decided to dress the same way, which Alex dressed me one day. I know that he still checks me out sometimes and I don't find anything wrong with that. I went into the bathroom and put on some make-up, but not as much as the girls in school. I don't like it. When I was done I, walked downstairs for breakfast. 

I sat at the table and Martha looked at me. I smiled and started eating my breakfast. 

- Ok, will you stop looking at me?

- Someone is dressed well today. Can I know why?

- Because I wanted to. 

- You only dress like that when you are happy or in good mood. 

- So? Are you telling me that I can't be dressed like that?

- No, I am saying that there is a boy called Alex who is making you happy since you are wearing the clothes, which he picked for you one day. 

Sometimes I forget how good is Martha's memory. Well, I share everything with her, since I don't have someone else. She still acts like a teenager sometimes, but at least she understands me. I have talked with Andrew as well, but he doesn't understand these things. 

- And why do you think like that?

- Because it's written all over your face. Moreover, the moment I said his name, your cheeks turn into light pink. 

- Really? - I said and pulled out the camera on my phone

They really are. This can't happen. How I will hide this when I see Alex in school? He won't know that he is the reason, but somehow, I have to do it. I don't want him to know. Not yet. One day I have to tell him, but until then I will keep my mouth shut. 

- Elle, what is going on?

I have to admit it. I know that she won't tell anyone so I can trust her. 

- I will tell you something, but promise me that you won't tell anyone. 

- Ok, I promise. Now, what's going on?

- I think that maybe I am falling for Alex. 

- I thought that you will tell me something new. 

- What do you mean?

- It was visible that you like him. 

- Please, promise me that you won't tell him. I will do it when the right time comes. Please. 

- Ok, I won't tell anyone. This will be our secret. 

Martha and I talked for a while and later I went to school. In the moment I saw Alex, I felt how my face is getting red. I preferred when he was doing it. I don't know what is going on with me. Even for my ex, I didn't feel that way. Maybe because he didn't actually love me. With Alex is different. Yes, we are only friends, but he shows more care than that used to be my boyfriend boy. 

I walked up to him with a smile, which he returned. 

- Elle, are you ok?

- Yes, why? I am totally fine. 

- Your face is red. You are not sick, right?

- No, I am not. I just feel a little bit hot. 

Then he realized the way I am dressed and he smiled. I winked at him and it was his turn to become red. Karma is a bad thing. Both of us were looking at each other, without saying a single word. I don't know is it awkward or just we have nothing to say. After a while, we decide to go for our first class. It will be a long day. I hope that my blushing will stop. 

After the class, I went to my locker and saw Jasper standing in front of him. He hasn't talked with me for almost a month so I wonder what he wants. I pretend as if I didn't see him and was about to open my locker when he moved exactly in front of it. 

- Can you move? I want to take my things for the next class. 

- We haven't talked for a while. Is this how you will greet me?

- Excuse me. Hello, can you move?

- I can, but I won't do it. 

- And why?

- Because I don't want to. 

- Look, I don't like you so can you go away?

- No, I can't. - he said, grabbed my hand, and pinned me to my locker

What the hell is wrong with him? I have told him many times that I don't like him and that I don't want to mess with him and his friends. What form that he can't understand?

- Let me go, you i***t. 

- I will do it if you do something for me. 

- And what is that something?

- If you give me a kiss, I will let you go.

- In your dreams. You are the last person who I would kiss.

- Because the nerd is the first one, right?

- What? I don't understand. 

- I know that you like the nerd, but let me tell you something. He can't give you all the things that I can. 

- Don't you have a girlfriend? I don't think that she will be happy to see you trying on another girl. Especially when she is right there. 

Luckily, he turned around and I used to moment to remove his hand from mine. He didn't look pleased that I lied to him and grabbed my hand again. Jasper was about to kiss me when someone appeared behind him. I won't lie that I am glad to see this person. 

- Let her go right now!

- Look, the nerd came to save his friend. Go away or I will finish you. 

- I said to let her go. 

- And if I don't? What will you do?

- That. - Alex said, removing Jasper's hand from mine and pulling me close

I gave him a big tight hug, coming with a small thank you. To be honest, I didn't expect him to do that, but I am very happy that he finally is fighting back with Jasper. I only hope that something won't happen to him after that. 

- Who do you think you are? I'll tell you. One big nothing. No one likes you so you don't have to pretend to be a hero. 

- That's not true. I like him. Alex is my friend and I won't let you talk like that about him. 

- Are you sure that he is only your friend?

I wanted to say something, but no words came out of my mouth. I don't know what is going on with me, but I will lie if I deny it. I'm not sure what I feel for Alex, but I can't say that he is only my friend. Lately, I don't trust my own feelings. 

- What happened? Did you swallow your tongue?

- I am pretty sure how the whole school saw that you are trying on me and very soon Maddie will find out and trust me. She won't be happy. 

- And I'm not. 

All of us turned around to see her standing behind Alex. Someone will be in trouble. I am so glad to see it. 

- Maddie, I can explain. 

- You know what? I was going to blame her, but I saw that this time she didn't do anything. Yes, I don't like her, but I saw what you did. I know that you want to separate Alex and her, but this doesn't mean that I will let you do what you want. Even cheating. 

- Alex, maybe we have to go. 

- No need to. I am not doing this for you. Look, Jasper, I like you and that's why I agree to go out with you, but lately, all you do is thinking how to separate them instead of me. Like I am a ghost. Yes, Alex might be a nerd, but to be honest he didn't do anything to you or whoever it is. 

- Are you defending me? - Alex asked her

- Let's say that when Elle came here and decide to be your friend at the beginning I couldn't understand why. Later I saw that maybe you are not that bad since she is doing so much for you. I don't know what she has found in you and I don't want to know, but maybe I was wrong about you. To make it clear this doesn't mean that I like you. 

- As long as you don't bother me, I am cool. 

- I won't and Jasper I think that you should stop too. I will say it like that. If you don't stop getting obsessed with the idea to separate them, you will be single. 

I couldn't believe my ears. Is she really saying all of this? I hope that it's not a joke or something like that. I wouldn't like it. I looked at Alex who was surprised just like me. Everybody was watching and I see that they can't believe what is going on. Is Jasper really obsessed with Alex and me? Why? I don't see anything wrong with us. Yes, I cut him off, but only because he was treating my friend badly. 

- Now, let's go, Jasper. We'll talk later. - Maddie said and both of them left

- Alex, are you ok?

- What? Yes, I am fine. Did this really happen?

- I think that it did. I only hope that it's not a game or something. I wouldn't like it.

- Me either. Let's go to class now. 

At least this made me stop thinking about Alex. Maddie was in our class, but she didn't say anything. Later Alex and I went to our place for lunch. My thoughts came back again. He is only my friend, but why can't I look him that way. He sat next to me and I looked at him. I don't feel the same anymore. Alex didn't do anything, except that kiss, which wasn't even real, but it was enough to make me feel different. 

- Elle, is everything ok? The whole day you are looking at me. Did I do something?

- Yes, I mean no. You didn't do anything. Don't worry. 

After school, Alex and I went to his house. We don't have much to study so when we finished we watched a movie. Usually, I am snuggling, but I don't feel comfortable doing it today. 

- Won't you snuggle?

- It's hot and I don't want to sweat.

- Ok, what is going on? 

- Nothing. 

- It's not... nothing. I want to know what is going on with you. 

Maybe I have to tell him. Alex is my friend and deserves to know the truth, no matter that he may hate me for it. I only hope that he won't make me leave. 

- I'm listening to you. 

- I just feel weird after yesterday. 

- What do you mean?

- I liked what you did more than I told you. 

With that, he looked at me. Is he mad? I hope not. I don't want to lose my friend. Alex is very important to me. I don't want to leave him alone. It took him so much time to get out of his comfort zone that he doesn't need to go back there. 

- You mean when I kissed you?

I didn't say anything and nodded my head. I felt tears in my eyes, but I wiped them. 

- That's it? 

- Aren't you mad?

- No, of course not. If you want I can give you another one. 

- I thought that you didn't like it. 

- Maybe I have changed my mind. - he said and winked at me, which made me laugh

It was better than expected. I am glad that we clear this out. 

- Can we continue with our movie now?

- I think that we can. - I said and snuggled

Alex wrapped his hand around me and instead to kiss the top of my head as usual he kissed my cheek. I felt how my cheeks turned into light pink. 

- Who is blushing now? - he chuckled

- You did it on purpose?

- It's called payback. 

I want to hate him, but I can't. I love my friend. Maybe I overreacted to what happened yesterday, but if he continues like that, I don't know what I will do. Let's hope that he won't do this again. I don't want to get addicted. It's time for my payback. If this is how we'll go, I see many paybacks. At least they are from the sweet kind. I believe that soon or not something will happen. We'll wait and see.