FOREVER AND ALWAYS

The Party

Julie tried to remember when things were good, when her dad still had his job, when their mother was still with them, the divorce really did a number on him. When she was younger she had never seen them argue openly, but she knew when things were not okay, the excessive makeup her mother use to put on, the way she stayed out of her fathers way, the silence.

She didn’t realize he was abusive until she was fifteen. She was the only one at home that evening, sandy took baby Cole to their neighbor’s for a play date. She could hear them arguing from her room, her mother was accusing him of something, asking about some phone calls, she was still trying to make sense of what her mother was saying when she heard her shriek, he had hit her, it continued for maybe 10 minutes or so but it felt like a lifetime. All she could do was close her ears, she couldn’t defend her.

She tried once, to defend her mother. It was the day after thanksgiving, but it didn’t end well. All she could remember was stepping in between them, she stood in front of her mother, maybe her dad didn’t see her, or was just blinded by rage, but all she could remember was light exploding all around her.

She woke up in the hospital later, sandy said she had been unconscious for 2 days, and the doctor said she had a fractured cheek bone. So that’s where her father had hit her, Julie tried moving her neck and realized she had braces on, that’s when she started feeling the dull throb all over her face and neck. Her mother came in later, holding her little brother cole, her face was red and her eyes swollen. “I can’t do this anymore, I can’t ” her mother kept muttering under her breath as she stroked Julie’s head. She looked across the room and saw her father standing outside the door, he looked pitiful, like he had been crying too. At that moment Julie wanted to die, she hoped that she had internal bleeding and the doctors wouldn’t notice so she would just sleep and not wake up. Nothing like that happened.

Her mother filed for divorce 2 weeks later, after she was discharged from the hospital.

*****

It had been three weeks since their conversation at the diner. Julie was at Ashley’s for the weekend. They had gone together to get a new phone for her, her mum had sent her some money so she just added up to buy it. Ashely lived off the campus so it was a bit more comfortable for Julie as her roommates were hardly ever around. They were watching a movie that morning,

“Broody’s party is this evening, should we go?” Ashely turned and asked her. Ashely was the fun one, in fact, most of the times Julie went out was with Ashely, she knew how to brighten a room with her presence. Normally Julie would have found 101 reasons to not go, but she had been under a lot of stress lately trying to balance up her grades, so she felt a little fun wouldn’t hurt.

“Well, it’s not like we have anything doing this evening, so why not?” She felt light as she said it, it had been a while since she attended a party, or any function at all. Even if it was on such short notice, she didn’t really mind.

Ashely shrieked “ who are you and what have you done with my friend?”

Julie chuckled “don’t get too excited, I might change my mind”

“No way! So, what are we going to wear? It has to be sexy” Ashley laughed as she stood up from the couch.

They spent the rest of the day trying to pick outfits, Julie couldn’t go back to her dorm so she had to wear one of Ashley’s dresses, a blue backless gown, well above her knee.

“Isn’t this too much?” She turned to look at her back in the mirror “I mean, there’s no sleeve, what if it gets cold out?”

“Oh, poor, simple Jules, that’s the whole point, we can take coats with. Is that better?” Ashely smirked at her from the mirror

“Yeah”

They got dressed and left for the party, Ashely wore a short green gown with a slit at the sides. Julie wore her hair down, Ashley’s hair was a short bob, so there wasn’t much work to do.

*****

They got to Broody’s apartment, music was blaring so loudly, they could hear it from the foot of the stairs. She wondered if the neighbors were going to call the cops because if the noise, but she doubted it, Broody always got away with these things.

They knocked on the door and it opened, Broody was standing at the doorway, at least he was trying to, he looked wasted, holding a cup in his hand. He embraced them tightly and dragged them inside.

The music was even louder inside. The room was full and the air looked foggy, Julie could see smoke rising from every corner of the room, maybe this was a bad idea, she turned to say something to Ashely but she was already dancing her way to the counter, for drinks. She searched the place with her eyes for somebody she might know, most of the faces were familiar but she didn’t exactly know most of them.

“Hey, take this” she turned to see Ashely holding a cup towards her, sweating and dancing. Well that was fast.

“I’ll be out back, a few of our friends are there” Julie took the cup and downed its contents. They walked to the back together where they met Sally, Israel and Carla, their friends from freshman year. They exchanged greetings and were talking for a while. Carla was talking about a pride rally they had that weekend and was asking if any of them would like to join her. “Is that really the plan or are you trying to get a new girl?” Sally asked her playfully, “that may be one of the reasons” Carla laughed. She just had a rough breakup with her girlfriend after she found out she was pregnant for her ex boyfriend. Julie felt pressed and stood to go to the bathroom “I’ll be right back guys” she heard a beep from her phone, it was from Ashley “please bring a bottle back with you, xoxo”.

She was in the hallway when someone grabbed her arm, she looked up to see Broody, how was he still standing, she thought he’d be passed out somewhere. “Hey.. I’m um, um, trying to find the bathroom” his speech was slurred, she was about to answer when he puked on her. She heard a few gasps. She stood there frozen, her checks had turned red, she was too embarrassed to move.

“okay man, that’s enough, you’ve had too much” she heard his voice, she knew who it was

“really sorry about that, I’ll get something to fix it” He said to her, she looked up at him, He was just staring at her, he held Broody by the shoulder and whisked him away. She managed to drag her feet to the bathroom, she smelt horrible. Her cheeks were getting warm as tears welled up in her eyes, “why did I come? Why didn’t I just stay home” she sobbed quietly as she tried to wipe off the vomit. Ashley and Carla entered the bathroom

“Hey honey” Ashely hugged her, wiping the tears with the back of her palm.

“You’ve got vomit on you now” Julie said with a chocked voice. They wiped it more with a handkerchief Carla brought. There was a knock on the door, Carla went to get it.

“Hey Jules” she came back holding a black rumper, “someone said to give this to you” She took it and changed out of her dress. They walked out of the bathroom and into the hallway. Ashley had already booked a ride to home and they were waiting for the driver.

“Hey, I’m really sorry about earlier” Julie turned to see him standing behind her, she didn’t say anything “For me and for him, I was rude that day and I apologize, which I should have done sooner. And for him, because I was supposed to be watching him knowing how excited he can get. So, sorry again”

Julie smirked “So all it took was getting barfed on for your to apologize. Wow” they both chuckled

“I’m Sam by the way” he extended his hand and they shook

“Julie” she said back. She took a good look at his face, the jawline, his eyes, slightly dropping at the end, like a girl’s. He was good looking.

“I’m guessing you’re the one that brought the romper, so thank you” He nodded and half smiled.

On their way home, she kept on replaying their conversation in her head. She even dreamt it, including the part where she got barfed on, everything was on repeat in her head