Desperate Moves

20

I walked hesitantly into the doctor’s office. My steps faltered a little and my hands were still trembling. He was on a call when I stepped in, so he motioned me to sit on a chair beside the large oak table in his office. I looked around the office as I sat. It was painted a light yellow color and had some beautiful flowers decorated with green color on it. There was a beautiful painting of sunset by a beach hanging on the wall behind him. A photo of a woman holding a baby sat on his desk, slightly facing him but also very visible to anyone sitting on the visitor’s desk. That must be his wife, I concluded.

He soon hung up and apologized for keeping me waiting.

“No problem Sir, I should be the one apologizing for inconveniencing you.” I tried to sound as strong as possible. Truth is, I would have loved the call to last forever.

“I’m just doing my job.”

“Thank you sir.” I really was not sure of how to respond to that, so I said the first thing that came to mind.

“How are you doing?” his tone was more serious now.

“I...I’m just ...I’m as fine as I can possibly be.” I stuttered. He was looking at me sympathetically. “I mean with everything that has happened...” I trailed off.

“Any new development? I mean, are you feeling anything different?”

I nodded slowly. I had dropped my gaze to my laps where my hands were rested and was fiddling with them. I was not sure of where to start from. After thinking for a moment, I decided to start from the least.

“I am not eating well and not sleeping well too.”

He grabbed a ball point pen from a pen rack on the table, tore a paper from a writing pad, similar to the one the receptionist had used earlier and scribbled on it. He must have sensed that that was not all so he gestured me to continue with a look.

“I am also itching.” I released a breath I did not even know I was holding, and turned my face away out of embarrassment. My face was flaming hot. I had expected the statement to have an effect on him, probably he should be embarrassed as well, but I was so wrong. He hears things like that almost every other day, so he must have gotten used to it. He even looked amused at my reaction.

“Ok...” he urged me on.

“I...” how hard can this possibly get? I had not planned on how exactly to frame the words to the bomb shell I was about to drop.

“Hey, relax. Breathe. The doctors are here to help. You don’ have to be nervous or think of the best way to frame what you are going through. Just say it the way it is.” I would have thought he was reading my mind if that were possible.

I did as he instructed; took in a deep breath and exhaled loudly before attempting to talk once again.

“I’ve been throwing up a lot in the morning recently. Any little smell makes me nauseous.”

“Ok... anything else?”

“No.”

“Just so I’m clear; is the itching in your private part?” he asked quite bluntly.

“Yes.” I still felt a bit flushed.

“Are you having abnormal vaginal discharge as well?”

Arrh! Doctors and their bluntness! “Yes.” I was a little annoyed.

“Any other symptoms, like frequent urination and pain while urinating?”

When he mentioned it, I remembered I had been urinating a little bit more than usual and I had also been experiencing pains while urinating; a symptom I attributed to the r**e.

“Yes.” I wanted to tell him that I had attributed that to the r**e, but I changed my mind about it.

“Ok. I will write out a list of test for you to carry out. You will bring back the result when the test is concluded.”

“Will the test result be out today?”

“Definitely, if you can afford to wait! In a matter of about an hour, the result should be ready. That is, if you are ready to do the test now.”

I didn’t mind having to wait for the results that day. I will be very useless if I had to go home and come back another day for the result. I only had to remember to tell Tosin to go. I didn’t understand the part of being ready. I raised my eyebrow giving him a confused look. “Ready?”

“If you are financially ready to do the test now.”

“How many tests am I to do and how much does each cost?” I was silently praying it should be something I could afford. I was running low on cash based on the budget I had made for the month and I didn’t want to dip my hands into my savings. Sam had offered to refund the money I had spent in the hospital but I declined, even when he insisted.

“You are to run two tests; one for sexually transmitted infections, and one for pregnancy.” Even though I was expecting it, I still flinched at the mention of pregnancy. I was shocked that I was more concerned about being pregnant than about STI’s especially HIV. That was probably owing to the fact that I could hide HIV for a long time, but not pregnancy.

“What is the cost of each test?” I asked again since he had omitted that detail.

“You will have to ask the lab technician.” He said as he brought out a medical analysis book. He took a slip out of it and wrote the tests I needed to do.

“Ok.” I said standing up. He handed to me the analysis slip he had written on, directing me to give it to the technician at the lab.

As soon as I stepped out from the doctor’s office, Tosin lifted his head from his phone which was keeping him occupied. He stood up and walked towards me. When he was close enough, he asked “How did it go?”

“It went fine.” I shrugged.

“What’s next?”

“I’m going to the lab for the test.”

“I’ll go with you.”

“Do you need to do that?” my forehead was creased as I turned to look at him.

“Do you have any reason not to let me go with you? If you do, ill respect it.” he said shrugging.

“The result may take a while to be ready. Could be more than an hour. I think you should go, while I take the test and wait for the result.”

“Edi, I don’t have classes till evening, so I can wait.”

“What of work?”

“I am my own boss.”

What if you are needed?”

“They’ll manage just fine without me for today.”

I actually did not have any other reason not to let him go with me to the lab, since the interpretation of the test result will be done in the doctor’s office, so I just let him tag along.

I didn’t know the way to the laboratory, so I asked the receptionist.

“This way” she said pointing to a small hallway to our left. “Turn right when you get to the end of the hallway. It’s the second door to the left.”

“Thank you.” We both said as we made our way to the laboratory.