Where I'm Supposed to Be

Chapter 2

The music was thumping, and smoke from hookah filled the air. Luna looked around the crowd for Stephen and couldn't find him. She figured he must be here, but where?

"Luna look, he's not even here anymore, they must have left," Sade said as she grabbed Luna's hand.

Sade pulled Luna to the bar where she ordered them two shots of vodka to calm her friend. So many thoughts ran through Luna's mind about how they never really talked after the breakup. She never hated him; in fact, she missed her best friend. It just angered her that he never really cared to reach out or even try to work things out. He accepted things and went on. In Luna's mind, he must have wanted an out and got just that.

"Do you wanna go home and talk about it?" Sade asked.

Luna looked around the crowd at everyone enjoying themselves and shook her head. "Nah, I promised I would make tonight our girls' night."

The song changed and reggae filled the room, Luna's favorite song to wind to. She twisted her head, closed her eyes, and smiled.

 "Let's dance," Luna said. 

Luna grabbed the hand of a mystery guy that had been eying her all night and pulled him close. She turned in front of him and winded her waist as he held her hips. She took her hand behind her head and placed it on his chest. The liquor had set in. Luna made up her mind, Stephen wasn't going to ruin her night.

"What's your name miss pretty?" Luna's mystery guy whispered in her ear.

Luna thought for a minute what name she would tell him. Sade and Luna never gave out their real names at clubs, it was always fun to be someone else for the night. She wanted something sweet but sassy.

"Raven," Luna whispered back as she turned and faced him.

The spotlight in the club bounced off of the walls and hit his face, "And who are you?" Luna said smiling.

"Luke…uncle Luke if ya nasty," he said laughing. Luna burst into tears laughing.

"You're corny but that was funny," Luna said still chuckling.

Luna paused for a moment as she got a good look at him under the cap he was wearing. His eyes were hazel-green, full lips, and a dark black beard. He smelled so good; something Luna was weak for. He held her hand and admired her back for a moment. Even his nails were clean. He had on a white button-up with dark jeans and a gold cross necklace resting on his chest. They danced a few more moments and exchanged numbers. Luna was hesitant about giving him her real number, but she secretly was extremely attracted to him.

Luke's phone flashed a few times and he looked down and back up to Luna.

"I wasn't wanting this night to be over but one of my guys is outside sick, I'm gonna go see about him." Luke said, "I'm going to text you, I hope you'll text back."

Luna smiled and looked him up and down, "we'll see."

Luna turned to see Sade wasn't far doing her happy dance and clapping to see her friend finally flirting again.

"It wasn't anything, just talking," Luna said blushing.

"Well, he's cute!" Sade exclaimed, "the guy I was with breath smelled like yuck," she said making a face.

 They both laughed and agreed they were tired and ready to go. They made their way out of the club and waited a short while.

"The uber is showing 5 minutes away," Sade said.

Luna looked around as more people started coming out and that's when she spotted Stephen. He walked side by side with a girl. Luna could see them, but they never looked over and seen her. Luna's heart sank. She instantly questioned who she was. It all made sense when Stephen and the girl stopped by his car and kissed.

"This is not happening right now," Luna said as she turned her head.

Sade hugged her and encouraged her that things will be okay. Luna's eyes began to water, and she felt faint. How is it that heartache physically hurts? Luna thought.

The uber driver pulled to the curb and Sade opened the door and slid in, Luna fixed her face and turned and that's when it happened. Stephen and Luna locked eyes. At that moment Stephen was shook. He hadn't seen her in what felt like forever. 

Luna quickly slid on the back seat of the car, slammed the door, and said, "please let's go."

A wave of emotion filled Luna's heart, but she sat in silence. Sade tried her best to figure her friend out, but Luna kept quiet the whole ride home. The uber pulled up to Sade and Luna's apartment they shared. They both jumped out of the car and went inside. At the same time, they went to their bedrooms. Luna walked through her door and slouched over on the bed. She peered up over her nightstand, her clock read 1:00 am. Luna pulled herself up and began undressing. She turned the shower on, steaming hot just like she liked it. She wrapped her hair up in a high bun and took wipes to rub off her makeup. She stepped in the shower and let the water run down her body. The steam and warmth of the water brought her comfort. She couldn't help but cry. She let all of the emotions she held back in the car flow like a river. She hated crying in front of Sade, or anyone for that matter. She built the idea up that she was over the situation to everyone, but she knew she was not. Luna closed her eyes and prayed for strength. She finished her shower, threw on comfy pajamas, and brushed her teeth. She headed out of her bathroom to see Sade standing there with a glass of wine.

"You ready to talk to talk it out yet?" Sade said.

Luna nodded and they headed to the living room where they lit candles and put on their favorite chick flick, "Waiting to Exhale." Sade always knew how to comfort her friend. Their personalities were so alike, she knew a cozy night of girl talk would bring her ease.

"So, what's going on in your head? I can't believe he was actually there, and with some girl?!" Sade exclaimed.

"It was just so sudden for me, and then to see him moved on so soon…I just don't understand," Luna said.

Luna always wondered if Stephen thought of her as much as she did of him. If he was reminded of her doing everyday life. Then to see him with someone, made her angry for thinking of him. She felt so pathetic. Sade put her arm around Luna and squeezed her softly.

"Tonight, we danced, you met a fine guy, and we had the best time, if Stephen is willing to let you go, let him go because he's the one who is missing out," Sade explained.

Luna knew her friend was right, and that she needed to move on. She was simply scared. In Luna's mind, Stephen got tired of her. His little acts of love stopped and all they did was argue. She worried that if she gave someone else a chance, she'd run them off too.

Luna felt the two sides of herself, one being a side that encouraged her like Sade did to move on and be happy, and the other that doubted her worth.

"I'm on the same page, and tonight showed me you're right," Luna said.

They finished the night reflecting on everything, laughing and making jokes. Before they knew it, they were both asleep.

The next morning Luna woke up and looked around realizing she was not in her bed. She shook Sade to go to bed and dragged herself and her blanket back to her room. The look on Stephen's face continued to play over and over in her mind. She drifted asleep when she got to her room. She dreamt of herself back in her old apartment she and Stephen shared.

"I don't think this is going to work, I can't keep arguing with you…I need space," Stephen said.

Those were the words Stephen said shortly after he never stopped having his space. He left that day and seldom came back. He went to stay with a friend and came back in spurts to pick up items here and there. He had given up and so had Luna. They came to terms to end the lease and go their separate ways.

Luna jumped up from her sleep to her phone vibrating on her face. Two messages came in at the same time. Both numbers weren't saved. 

One read, "Good morning beautiful, this is Luke," while the other message said, "Lue I can't get you off of my mind."

The only person in the world that called her "Lue" was Stephen.