Chloe

Chapter 3 - Tension

The constant noise from the waves was even getting to me. Crash, crash, crash. Does it ever stop? I tried walking inside, closing all the doors to shut out the never ending roar but then the clock tick seemed louder. Tic, tic, tic. So I dismantled the clock, satisfied to have peace but the quietness felt loud. The low hum of the refrigerator, the click and soft woosh of the air conditioning, won’t it go away? Can’t I escape this? Why hasn’t Edwin called me? –Chloe’s diary

Chapter 3

Tension

Since she didn’t sleep the night before, school was even more unbearable than usual. She fell asleep in study hall and got written up for it. Her second period teacher yelled at her for dropping her book, her classmates sneered and taunted.

To say her first week of school was not going well at all and her home life was worrying her was an understatement. Everything felt precarious, and she didn’t know what to do or how to ask for help.

The only bright spot was that Britney must have been occupied with some sort of cheerleading thing because she and her cronies were nowhere to be seen. She was thankful for that one small boon.

   She and Kim sat together on the bus that bumped along without too many words spoken between them. It was by mutual consensus that their life sucked at the moment and they really didn’t want to discuss why. 

Chloe decided it was time for her to visit Bear since she had neglected him since school started. Thank goodness Cole was there to let Bear out of his stall, otherwise she would have felt horrible.

   First she needed to go to the cottage and change into jeans. Walking up the steps, Edwin greeted her but without his usual charm. He was distracted. She didn’t push but went to her bedroom to change.

As she slid on her jeans she wondered what his father did that required so much of Edwin’s time, and why was Edwin being secretive? What was that argument with Christoph about last night? She got irritated from the lack of answers but she was still afraid to broach a subject that may cause an argument. She decided small steps would be easier, one question at a time.

 Her stomach was upset asking any question but she pressed on. She needed to know something. She walked back out into the living room to find Edwin watching the ocean.

She sat next to him, “How’s home?” That was a good question, she thought, easy to answer.

Edwin turned toward her, looking confused for a moment. When his expression cleared, as if he remembered that he had a home, he answered simply. 

“Good.” 

Not a great answer. She would try again, “Anything interesting happen?”

“No.”

She was getting irritated and tired of Edwin being evasive so she said snappishly, “Do you do anything interesting outside of here?”

And that was all it took for Edwin to snap.

“What’s with the twenty questions?! Do I have to come home and have you question me too? God won’t everybody leave me the hell alone!”

It was the first time Edwin ever yelled at her, but it just confirmed what her father beat into her. Questions lead to unhappiness. Tears welled up in her eyes and she began shaking. She stood up for a moment but she didn’t know where she was going. Finally she stumbled out of the room to her room even though it offered no sanctity. She curled into a ball in the middle of her bed, something she hadn’t done since Germany.

   Edwin followed her into her room a moment later. When he saw her curled in the fetal position, he cursed.  When she felt the bed dip, she knew he was making his way to her. 

“I’m sorry Chloe. I’m really sorry,” he said softly. She stiffened slightly when he placed his hand lightly on her hip. 

“I’ve had a bad day. My father’s been on to me about some obligations, and I found out today that I’m leaving tomorrow for England.”

She gasped and sat up, turning toward him.

“No,” she shook her head and grabbed his shirt with her fists, “NO!” she said more forcefully. 

He closed his eyes and ran his hand through his hair. He looked like he didn’t get much sleep last night either. He looked pained.

“Yes, I’m afraid so.”

Her heart shattered. Barely able to choke it out she asked, “Are you breaking up with me?” 

His eyes registered shock, and he grabbed her arm still attached to his shirt, 

“Hell no, don’t ever say that or THINK that. I’m coming back as soon as it’s humanly possible and don’t think for a minute that I’ll ever let you go.” 

Yeah right, he was going back home, he‘ll never miss her. She searched his eyes for the truth, trying to see past the lies.

“Are you sure? You might go away and find that I’m not at all what you need or want….” She stopped then, ashamed at herself for being so pitiful. 

“Why do you ask, are you wanting to break up with me?” he asked with a degree of alarm to his voice.

She laughed but it was harsh and held no humor. “Are you insane? I’m afraid that if it was my choice, you would never leave my side.” 

She sighed, tears fresh in her eyes, “There’s no need to discuss this now, what will happen…will happen. I know you have your obligations,” she said obligations as if it was a dirty word, “and there is nothing we can do about it. Let’s not spend tonight fighting. It will be our last night for a while.” At that her heart squeezed painfully and her eyes filled up further with tears. His eyes reflected the same pain.

   They didn’t say that much that night. Edwin was upset he didn’t have enough time to arrange things at her school properly before he left, she was upset because he was leaving. She assured him that she would be fine, he assured her that he would back. They were empty promises but she refused to dwell on it.

  When morning came she held him tightly to the very last minute, tears still glistened in her eyes when she left the house and walked to her bus stop. She couldn’t believe Edwin wouldn’t be waiting for her when she got home - she wanted to throw up. 

One of her safety nets was just snatched from underneath her.