Unraveling Eris

Throwing Vegetables at Royalty: A Memoir I

Eris hadn't meant to linger.

In fact, she hadn't meant to be here at all.

She had only stopped by the library to return a book—an errand that should have taken less than five minutes. But as she passed one of the larger meeting halls, she noticed an unusual stillness inside. The doors had been left slightly ajar, and through the narrow gap, she could see a handful of noblemen gathered around a long table, their expressions grim.

At the head of it sat Theo.

Eris hesitated.

She had seen him in many settings—smirking, provoking, debating, infuriating—but never like this.

Gone was the teasing glint in his eyes, the ever-present amusement laced through his words. Instead, he was wholly composed, his expression unreadable as he studied the documents before him.

"—If we act too soon, we risk exposing our position." His voice was calm, measured. Decisive. "But if we wait, they gain the advantage. We need to control the narrative before they do."

A nobleman across from him frowned. "Are we certain the reports are accurate?"

Theo tapped his fingers against the table, deep in thought. "Given the source? Yes. And if even half of it is true, we can't afford complacency."

Another noble leaned forward. "Then what do you propose, Your Highness?"

Theo exhaled, straightening. "We preempt them." He glanced at a map spread across the table. "A formal statement won't be enough. We need action—subtle, but undeniable. We apply pressure here, here, and here." He pointed to various locations, his tone sharpening. "Nothing overt, nothing reckless. Just enough to remind them that Areta is not idle."

The men exchanged glances, murmuring their agreement.

Eris realized, somewhat begrudgingly, that they weren't just humoring him. They respected him.

He's not just playing at being Crown Prince.

She had always assumed Theo took his title lightly. He was too smug, too irreverent, too infuriating to be anything else. But this version of him—the one strategizing with cold precision, commanding the room without raising his voice—was something else entirely.

It unsettled her.

Eris didn't like Theo, obviously. He was arrogant, exasperating, and—

Her thoughts cut off as she realized he had gone still.

And then, slowly, he turned his head—directly toward her.

Their eyes met through the sliver of space between the doors.

Eris inhaled sharply.

For a moment, neither of them moved.

Then, ever so slightly, Theo smirked. "Oh?" His voice carried across the room, smooth and infuriatingly knowing. "No witty remark?"

Eris scowled.

And left immediately.

There was a brief pause before one of the nobles frowned, following Theo's line of sight. "Your Highness... who were you speaking to just now?"

Theo leaned back in his chair, exuding an air of supreme satisfaction. "No one of consequence."

A lie, of course.

But he wasn't about to explain why Eris Elhan had been watching him—and why, for the first time, she'd had absolutely nothing to say.

And Eris should have known better than to sit across from Theo at dinner.

It wasn't as though she had a choice—Georgiana had dragged her to the table before she could protest, and somehow, she had ended up directly in Theo's line of sight.

She should have left. She would have left, except that she was starving, and escaping now would only signal defeat.

And she refused to let Theo win anything.

Unfortunately, Theo seemed determined to make her regret her decision.

"You've been quiet today," he mused, twirling his fork between his fingers as he studied her with infuriating amusement. "That's unlike you. Lost in thought?"

Eris didn't even look up from her plate. "I've had nothing worth responding to."

"Ah," Theo said, nodding sagely. "So you have been thinking about me."

Eris shot him a glare.

William, who was seated beside him, let out a low whistle. "You're playing with fire, my friend."

"Am I?" Theo leaned forward slightly, lowering his voice as if sharing a great secret. "Because I distinctly recall someone watching me rather intently this afternoon."

Eris' fork stilled mid-air.

Slowly, she looked up.

Across the table, Theo's smirk widened.

William coughed into his drink. Georgiana, sensing something, glanced between them with open curiosity. Cassian, who had been trying to enjoy his meal in peace, sighed and muttered, "Here we go again."

Eris placed her fork down carefully. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Theo hummed, as if unconvinced. "You could just admit it. I wouldn't judge."

Eris narrowed her eyes. "Admit what, exactly?"

"That you find me fascinating."

A long silence followed.

Then—

A cabbage leaf hit Theo square in the face.

William choked on his wine.

Georgiana gasped.

Cassian muttered, "I knew this would happen eventually."

Theo, stunned into silence for once in his life, reached up and slowly plucked the cabbage from where it had landed.

Eris folded her arms. "Fascinating enough for you?"

For a moment, Theo just stared at her.

Then, to her absolute horror, he grinned.

"You are obsessed with me," he said smugly, setting the cabbage aside as if it were a treasured gift. "This is exactly the kind of passionate reaction I'd expect."

Eris picked up another piece of cabbage.

Cassian, clearly tired of the entire ordeal, grabbed her wrist before she could throw it. "Absolutely not. One diplomatic incident per meal is enough."

William, wheezing, wiped his eyes. "I swear, I live for this."

Georgiana, still watching with barely concealed delight, said, "I told you two spend more time talking to each other than anyone else."

Eris scoffed. "That's because we're arguing."

William smirked. "And yet you still seek each other out. Fascinating."

Theo, utterly delighted, leaned back in his chair. "She can't resist me."

Eris, deadpan, turned back to her food. "I genuinely cannot stand you."

Cassian sighed. "And yet."

Theo let out a dramatic sigh and leaned back in his chair, placing a hand over his chest as if deeply wounded. "You do realize that assaulting a member of the royal family is a grave offense, don't you?"

Eris gave him a flat look. "It was cabbage, Your Highness."

He exhaled heavily. "And yet, it has wounded me in ways I may never recover from." He gestured vaguely at his cheek. "The humiliation. The sheer violence of it all."

Georgiana, barely holding back laughter, gasped in mock horror. "Eris, what have you done? You've gravely injured our future king!"

William immediately joined in, shaking his head solemnly. "The Crown Prince of Areta, felled by leafy greens. What a tragedy."

Cassian muttered, "I'm surrounded by idiots."

Eris pinched the bridge of her nose. "I hate all of you."

Theo, looking entirely too pleased with himself, leaned forward again. "I could have you punished, you know."

Eris arched a brow. "Go ahead."

He smirked. "I would."

She leaned forward, matching his gaze. "By all means, go ahead."

A pause.

Then Theo grinned, pushing his plate toward her slightly. "Fine. You can pay penance by giving me your bread roll."

Eris stared at him. "I would rather throw more cabbage at you."

William clapped his hands. "Do it."

Cassian groaned. "I'm leaving."

Georgiana, laughing, reached for Eris' arm. "No, no, I need to see how this plays out."

Eris, scowling, took her bread roll and slammed it onto Theo's plate. "There. Happy?"

Theo picked it up, inspecting it with an air of great satisfaction. "Immensely."

Georgiana turned to Cassian with an expression of absolute delight. "Aren't they adorable?"

Cassian rubbed his temples. "They're something, alright."