Her secret mate

A touch can heal

Our lips moved with a new-found hunger and need.

The need to taste more of him, to have more of him, was undeniable. And today I had no wish or need to deny myself any of it, so I let myself just feel this... this current moment and get lost in the kiss. The need was driving me wild, and I became bolder and bolder with every moment. My hands landed on his shoulders and I gave him a slight push so that I could have more access to him, and he went down willingly.

His hands stayed on my ass while I devoured him.

My lips and teeth were not gentle or careful as I moved down his neck. Only now did I notice the anger that filled my chest... I... I felt that anger grow and growing in my chest and the need to hurt him became too strong to ignore. With enough force to break the skin, my teeth sank into his color bone. The coppery taste of his blood filled my mouth as a pained moan left Darcy's mouth.

The anger in my chest did not subside... the pain he felt did not help.

A part of my brain tried to understand what the hell brought this anger.

My teeth sank down again, this time a bit lower, closer to his peck, and he released another painful moan.

As I was about to move lower... to do it once again, he stopped me.

His hands landed on my shoulders as he slightly pushed me back, enough so that our eyes could meet.

"Baby, please... a bit gentler..."

Our eyes met and for a second I saw a shadow of concern in his lust-clouded eyes. The concern in his eyes, only fed the guilt I was feeling.

The guilt for being angry with him for no apparent reason... guilty for using him to sooth the pain and get my mind to shut up for at least a moment so that I would not go completely crazy.

I felt guilty that I was doing this with him, when I knew that he was not my mate...

It felt like a light bulb went in my head as I realized the reason for my anger...

I was not angry that he lied to me... or that he kept things from me.

I am not angry at him, because he did not contact me for the whole week that I was at my parents... or because he never told me that we were not mates...

No... I was angry at him because he was not my destined mate.

I'm so angry at him right now, because I want him to be my mate... for him to be Colin... that I would be kissing Colin and not him...

Tears started to gather in my eyes again and before even one of them could roll down my cheek I was in Darcy's hands again.

"Shhh... it's okay baby... it's okay..."

He gently pushed my face into his neck and started to rock us gently as ugly sobs formed in my chest.

"It's okay, I'm not angry with you... it's okay..."

He whispered to me and I did not have it in me to tell him the real reason why I was crying. I did not tell him that the reason why I started to cry even harder was because I really, really wanted him to either become my true mate or to... to be Colin.

We spent almost an hour like that, with him rocking me to his chest until my tears finally died down again.

The heat and lust that was there before died down alongside my tears, and it left me so exhausted. I curled up into his chest and let myself just exist in the current moment while he continued to softly stroke my back.

An hour after I finally stopped crying, there was a light knock on the door.

"Alpha Darcy, miss Valery, please come to get breakfast."

I recognized the silent voice of one of my father's omegas. She did not wait for an answer as a moment later we heard the light taps of her feet as she walked away from the door.

Darcy was the first to move out of the two of us. He pressed his lips to the top of my head as his hands gently stroked my hair.

"We need to get up, or they will cause a scene."

He whispered as I carefully nodded and made a move to rise. Pulling away from his warm body, I felt cold creep into me and only now did I remember that I was almost naked.

Another wave of guilt with light layers of self-disgust started to rise when I felt his warm palm on my cheek.

"Hey? You okay?"

A small smile appeared on my lips as I gave a short nod. It was nice to feel that, no matter the circumstances that we were under... he... he was still Darcy.

"I... I am not sure..."

I told him, feeling the need to be completely truthful with him.

My words only deepened the frown on his face and I rushed to reassure him.

"But I will be... I have to be..."

The last part was more to myself than him, but I guess he knew where I was coming from because I felt a soft kiss on my forehead. He was probably one of the few people that really understood what I meant by those words, and it felt reassuring to know that he still got me... even if we were not true mates.

"Well, don't rush it, take your time."

He whispered as he lowered his legs to the floor and turned to me again, this time with a bright smile on his face.

"Well, I almost forgot."

He said as he gave me a small kiss on the lips as I stared at him confused.

"Happy birthday."

The light happy notes in his voice mixed with the simplicity of his words in the current situation made me laugh. Actually, in the mix of everything that has happened in the last... eight hours, I completely forgot about it.

I guess my laughter was infectious because not a moment later he joined me and we both laughed to the point of tears.