Youngblood

Chapter 19

Cameron

After we got back to Saint Petersburg, I kind of lingered around just to stay close to Rachel. 

We all ended up on the basketball court playing basketball.  I couldn’t help but smile as Traci chased Rachel who was laughing so hard, she could barely run straight.  “TELL ME!”  Traci yelled as she chased her towards me.  I looked at Kenny as he looked at me.  We both shrugged our shoulders. 

I looked back at Rachel as she ran behind me.  “HE’S NOT GOING TO SAVE YOUR ASS!  NOW TELL ME!”  Kenny grabbed Traci allowing Rachel to hide behind me.  I smiled listening to her laughing and trying to catch her breath.  I faced Rachel making her look at me as she continued to laugh. 

“RACHEL TELL ME OR I’M GOING TO KICK YOUR ASS!”  “What is she supposed to tell you?”  I asked as Traci took a deep breath and looked at me.  “She’s falling back into her depression again.  What happen on your trip?”  I looked at Rachel as she stood next to me.  “Nothing happened.”  She answered.  Kenny and Traci looked at me for confirmation.  I looked beside me at Rachel who was trying to threaten me through her stare.  “Cameron look at me.”  Traci ordered.  I looked at her.  “What happened on your trip?”  “We had fun.  What exactly are you asking me?”  “Nothing!” Rachel yelled looking at Kenny for help.  He shook his head at her. “Rachel we’re trying to help you.  Talk to me.”  I looked back at Rachel who stood there trying not to explode.  “What am I missing?”  I asked.  “Her depression.” Kenny answered. “She’s having a setback.  Something on your trip triggered it.”  Traci explained.  I looked at Rachel who was backing away from everyone.  “How do you expect her not to be depressed?  She was at Disney World and her kids are dead.  She never got to take them.” 

They stood there staring at me thinking about what I dropped on them. Their attention then shifted to Rachel who was halfway to the back door.  Kenny and Traci gathered the kids as I followed her.  She walked through the kitchen to the living room and down the hall to her room.  She entered the room and slammed the door in my face after her.  I opened it and stepped in.  She collapsed on the bed as I looked around.  This was my first time in her room.  I noticed on the floor by the closet was her book bag with two books and a notebook scattered around it with her highlighters and pens.  A few feet away were about four dolls, a coloring book, and crayons.  On my way to her bed, I stopped at her dresser.  I noticed she had a collection of different perfumes.  “Do you wear all of these?”  I asked looking back at her as she sat up.  She stared at me wondering whether to curse me out or answer my question.  “No.  Most of those were gifts.  I don’t really go out, so I don’t wear them.”

Rachel

He nodded his head and sat next to me.  “Why are you in my room?”  I asked.  He smiled.  “Because I like being around you.”  I jumped to my door swinging open. Kenny and Traci walked in.  Kenny sat in my recliner and Traci lay on top of me hugging me making me laugh.  She kissed me as we sat up.  “Is that why you didn’t want to go in the first place?”  Traci asked.  I shook my head.  “I just didn’t want to be around him.”  Everyone looked at Cameron.  “She likes me she just doesn’t know it yet.”  I looked at Kenny as he fell out laughing.  “Shut up.”  Cameron mumbled making me laugh.

 “Well, I see that has changed.”  Traci said smiling at me.  “What?”  I asked.  “You like him.”  I looked at Cameron as he smiled at me.  “See I told you.”  He said to Kenny who was shaking his head at him. “I mean he’s okay and all, I guess.”  Kenny burst out laughing as Cameron smiled at me.

  “I shared my nachos with you, and you guess I’m okay?”   “Hey, you drooled in my Slurpee and made my baby throw up.”  “I did not drool in your nasty ass Slurpee.”  “Oh, now its nasty?  It wasn’t nasty when your ass was washing down them nachos.”  “Jalapenos are hot.  I needed something to drink.”  He said as we laughed.  “I’m glad you’re feeling better.”  I smiled at him.

 “And, for what it’s worth Rachel, I know that you feel guilty that you lived, and they didn’t.”  I stared at him.  “It’s not your fault.”  “I’m their mother.  I should have protected them better.”  “You can’t protect them from everything. And let’s say by some miracle you did save them, they would have died some other way.”  I sat there letting his words sink in. 

I relived that day almost every day.  What if I held onto Robi instead of Tiffany?  Would he have lived?  Would I have never gotten so depressed to the point Mario needed to get me out the house?  Would he and Roni still be alive?  If they were alive would I still be in California? Would Maryah have been born?   I feel like I would be living happily ever after with Mario and our kids if I somehow were able to save them.  But I didn’t. 

I sat there going over everything in my head until I came to the conclusion, I could not have saved them. 

I looked at Cameron who was playing around with Maryah who was sitting in his lap.  Maybe he was right.  Maybe it wasn’t my fault.  Whether it was my fault or not I would give anything to have all three of them here with me.  To be able to kiss Robi’s chubby cheeks and hear Roni’s beautiful laugh again or feel Mario holding me is something I would always crave for the rest of my life.

            That morning I found myself standing at Mario’s grave in California.  I looked at the two tiny graves next to his and yearned for them more than ever.  I needed to touch and smell them again.  I dropped down to my hands and knees and began digging.  I franticly pulled the dirt back trying my hardest to get to the love of my life.  That’s when a tiny hand caught my attention from the corner of my eye. I looked over to my left at Roni’s grave where his tiny dirty arm waved around from under the dirt.  “RONI!”  I screamed diving for his hand. I held his hand as I franticly dug him out.  No matter how much I dug, I just couldn’t uncover his body.  He seemed to slip further and further away from me.  I looked up as the dirt began to fill the hole with me inside.  I screamed as I tried to fight against the dirt.  It filled my mouth and splashed in my eyes blinding me.  I continued fighting the caving hole until I felt a hand land on my face.

Cameron

            I was sitting on Rachel’s bed next to her trying to wake her from her nightmare when she jumped up screaming making me jump up.  I stood back watching her sit there half asleep and panicked gasping for air.  My heart pounded out of my chest watching her look around the room.  

            Her eyes stopped on me as Traci stood in the doorway watching us.  She stared at me trying to figure out if I was real or not.  That’s when I reached over and smoothed her sweaty hair out her face.  She relaxed immediately making me return to her side.  She rested her head on my shoulder as I gently rubbed her back.  I wiped her sweaty forehead with my hands and kissed it as her breathing slowed. 

“You’ve got to get a grip baby.”  I said as she nodded her head.  “I can’t save them even in my dreams.”  She admitted.  “Maybe you were never supposed to.  Maybe it was destined to happen this way.”  “I don’t accept that.”  I looked at her.  “You don’t have a choice.  They’re gone baby.  There’s nothing you can do about it.  You have to accept that or you’re going to go crazy.” “I’m already crazy.”  I smiled.  “Okay, crazier.  Then I have to be crazier so I can get put away with you.”  She sat up and looked at me.  “Why are you in my room?” 

We looked at Traci as she laughed and walked away. 

“Because you were screaming, crazy.”  She looked away to keep from smiling.  “I ran in here to kick some ass because I thought you were in here fighting and s**t and you were still asleep.”  She burst out laughing making me smile. 

I loved hearing her laugh.  It was one of the most beautiful sounds she could ever make.   

 “Are you okay now?”  I asked making her look at me.  She smiled and nodded her head.  I returned the smile as I stood up.  “Goodnight.”  I said walking towards the door.  “Stay.”

 I froze in place as I stood there staring at the doorway wondering if I was going crazy.  I turned and looked at her.  She reached over on the other side of the bed and pulled the covers back.  I looked at her and then the bed.  “Please?”  She asked making me feel aroused.

 Oh God, I thought turning away for a moment.  Did she really have to say it like that?  “What?”  She asked as I composed myself.  I turned back to her and smiled.  “Nothing, but just so you know, I sleep naked.” 

She stared at me for a moment before laughing.  I laid beside her in her bed as we both faced each other.  We laid there a moment staring at each other until she started drifting to sleep.  “You can come closer if you want.”  I said as she closed her eyes.  “I don’t want to give you another erection.”  She mumbled making me laugh.  She smiled.  “You saw that huh?”  “It was kind of hard to miss.”  “I hope you don’t think you were going to get some d**k from me tonight because I’m holding out.”  She looked at me and laughed.  “You think because I asked you to stay, we’re going to f**k?  No Cam.  I’m not one of your whores.”  I couldn’t help but laugh.  “So, we’re really not going to f**k?”  I asked as she laughed again.  “No, Cam.”  I stared at her for a moment.  “Are you sure?  Because I feel like something supposed to be happening right now.”  She laughed again making me smile.  “No, and you better not have one of those dreams either in my bed.”  “I’m a grown ass man.”  “I see.”  “Shut up.”  She laughed again. 

Melina

            I was dancing the night away with Helena at the club.  I was half drunk, high as hell, and wanted the night to last forever.  I looked at Helena who was gulping down her drink.  She sat the glass on the floor and ran to the post where the dancers were. She climbed the stairs and began dancing with the dancer on the pole.  My God this woman is so f*****g sexy!  I thought watching her swirl on the pole twerking.  I watched the crowd go crazy for her.  I guess they feel the same way.  I looked back at Helena to catch her stare.  I watched her sexily dance on the pole for no one but me.

 A minutes later we were in the bathroom ripping each other’s clothes off.  It was so crazy how addicted to this woman I was.  She held me against the sink drowning me in her lustful kisses while her merciless fingers adored my insides. 

“Excuse me,” We looked at the attendant who was sitting there watching us. She was six shades of red. “Do you mind taking that somewhere else please?”  I looked back at Helena who did not want to stop.  She inhaled my n****e and continued her quest.  My legs wrapped around her waist and I held her closer to me.  She pushed me away and bent me over the cold sink facing the attendant.  The attendant covered her mouth in embarrassment and shock watching Helena’s face disappear inside me from behind.  I held the sink and attempted to watch the attendant, but my eyes began to cross feeling her arrogant tongue torment me until I couldn’t take anymore.  She threw one of my knees on the sink to give her easier access to my core.  My n****e bounced against the freezing sink which intensified my aura!  All I could do was scream out in pleasure and let my body convulse against her face.  “That’s my baby.”  I heard Helena say kissing at my back as I tried to breathe.  I looked at the attendant who was still watching us in shock. I giggled and stood up.  I guess she likes the show, I thought facing Helena.  She smiled at me as she licked my juices off her lips and fingers.  I watched her sit back on the floor as I stepped out my underwear.  “Oh my God!”  The attendant said rushing out the bathroom leaving me to straddle Helena.  I pressed my soaked lips against hers making her moan out in pleasure.  She watched me watching her.  Pleasure filled her face each time I grinded into her.  Her hands roamed up my stomach to my bouncing breasts.  She began playing with them as I played with hers.  It felt so good f*****g her right there on that bathroom floor.  I felt so free and happy!  I did not want to stop ever.   We filled the bathroom with our moaning and panting until we both fulfilled each other.

About two hours later we finally made it to my house.  We walked into the house together.  I spotted Thaddeus asleep on the couch with Malik.  I smiled at them and watched them sleep for a moment before following Helena to the guest room.  I spent what was left of the night locked in that room fulfilling the woman I had fallen madly in love with.

It was crazy I felt like this about her and didn’t care who knew it.  I was finally happy again and wanted to stay that way.  My son and brothers were taken care of and I didn’t have to torture myself anymore by sleeping with Thaddeus.  All I wanted was Helena. 

That morning I awakened with my face buried in Helena’s naked breast. I was still laying on top of her with her holding me while she slept.  The sun blared in my face making me turn towards the door to see Thaddeus standing there in shock.  After about a minute or so he walked out closing the door behind him.  I laid my face back in Helena’s breast and went back to sleep.