The Devil’s Healer

Chapter 4:

ROSALIA POV:

The first thing I saw was Sophias car pulling into the parking garage. I had been sitting there for a while I guess. My phone lit up again, Sophia was calling me.

I answered before the ring even ended.

"I am here " she said. "I am in the parking garage."

"I am coming " I said,. She had already hung up.

Than a minute later I saw her running across the garage in sweatpants, a big hoodie and slippers that did not match. I would have laughed if things were different. She opened my car door before I could even unlock it and hugged me

"Rosalia..." She saw my face and all the sarcastic things she was going to say just disappeared. "Oh sweetheart " she said.

"I am fine " I said.

She snorted. "You look like you got hit by a truck."

"I have looked worse " I said.

She raised an eyebrow. "You literally have not."

We sat there in silence for a bit. Then she got down beside my seat. "Talk to me " she said.

I shook my head. "If I start talking I will cry " I said.

"Then cry " she said.

I do not want to " I said.

"You do not have to be strong with me Rosalia " she said.

I stared at the steering wheel. "I was not enough " I said and I did not mean to say that loud.

Sophias face got all serious. "No you do not get to blame yourself for someone Mistakes " she said.

" If I had..." I started to say.

"If you had what?" she said. "Been prettier? Funnier? Taller? More exciting?" She took my hands in hers. "You could have been all those things. He would still have cheated on you. This is not about what you lacked Rosalia. It is about what he lacked."

For the time that night I believed someone. Sophia. Got my handbag from the passenger seat. "Get out we are going to my apartment " she said.

"I will be fine " I said.

"No you will not " she said.

"I will survive and I can’t leave my car " I said.

"I know you will but you are surviving at my apartment, I will get your car for you, okay? " she. She closed my car door before I could say anything else.

She reminded me of all the times I had been there for her. How she was not going to let me push her away now. "Do not insult me by pretending you are a burden Rosalia " she said.

I smiled a little. "That was mean " I said.

"It was and it worked " she said.

We drove to her apartment in silence. It was not uncomfortable. It was the kind of silence that only happens between people who love each other.

When we got to her apartment she unlocked the door. Went to the kitchen. I took off my shoes. "I am not hungry " I said.

She did not ask me if I was hungry she just brought out a bowl of pasta. "You have barely eaten today " she said.

The pasta was not homemade she had ordered it. I laughed a little. "You know your strengths " I said.

She smiled. "I do." We ate in silence. Then she brought out hot chocolate. "You made chocolate " I said.

She just poured milk into chocolate powder. "I am very proud of myself " she said.

We sat on the couch. She put her arm around me. "You know I keep thinking about what happened and I wonder if there was a sign " I said.

"There probably was " she said. ". Love can make us blind to things we do not want to see."

I started crying and she wiped away my tears. "You loved him honestly Rosalia and you should not be ashamed of that " she said.

"I feel stupid " I said.

"You are not stupid " she said.

"I trusted him " I said.

"One day someone worthy of your trust will thank God you still know how to trust " she said.

I put my head on her shoulder. For the first time all night the silence did not hurt. It comforted me. Sophia turned on the TV. We did not watch it. At some point she put a blanket over us.

"You can sleep in the guest room " she said.

"I do not want to keep you awake " I said.

She rolled her eyes. "I have seen you survive school, Rosalia, one broken heart is not going to scare me " she said.

"Thank you " I said.

She kissed the top of my head. "You do not thank family, Rosalia " she said.

The word family stuck with me. I had spent years thinking I did not have one. Maybe I was wrong.

That night I lay in the guest room staring at the ceiling. I cried again. It was quiet this time. I was not crying because I wanted Enzo back. I was crying for the future I had imagined for the promises that would never be kept for the version of myself that had believed love was enough.

Eventually I fell asleep and as I drifted off one thought stayed with me: tomorrow I would have to learn how to live without him.